4 Phrases Deeply Irresistible Men Always Say On The First Date

Learn how to be respectable, but still flirty.

Last updated on Jul 05, 2025

Man using irresistible phrases on a first date. Halay Alex | Shutterstock
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First dates are a lot like job interviews: You can't score the soulmate or the paycheck without that first meet-and-greet. While some glide through this necessary evil with straight-A finesse because they understand how to act on a first date, others bumble along a path of C-worthy mediocrity, producing mixed results.

Whether you and the person across from you will one day get married, we can't say, but you can't go wrong following the tactics below to ensure you come across as deeply irresistible on a first date.

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Here are four phrases deeply irresistible men always say on the first date:

1. 'I love that (insert clothing piece, hairstyle, tattoo, eye makeup)...'

woman laughs with man on a first date Lucky Business | Shutterstock

When you first see us, compliment us. I know, I know, are we really that insecure? Are we really that vain? The answer is yes. But don't paw and drool like imprisoned frat boys.

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We wouldn't be on a date if we wanted someone grabbing our butt. Surely, there's a dive bar down the street that can provide that service if desired.

Instead, appreciate the beading on our turquoise bracelet, compliment our navy blue eyeliner, or our trench coat. No, you won't sound gay. Trust us. You'll earn a few bonus points on the final exam if you appreciate our limited-edition Puma sneakers.

Of course, don't go overboard (no need to sound like Michael Kors), and don't force it. Rather, just verbalize what you're thinking.

RELATED: 13 Signs You're Basically Dating A Houseplant

2. 'And why do you say that?'

This may come as a shock, but we're as smart, funny, and quirky as we are beautiful. Find out for yourself by asking questions and genuinely listening to the answers. Research from Harvard Business School shows that people who ask more questions, especially thoughtful ones that dig deeper, are not only liked more but also remembered, making them more emotionally intelligent and likable on dates. 

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You may begin to feel a bit like a therapist, which means you're on the right path. And when you start to feel like the interviewer on a 60 Minutes reel, then you know you're golden, baby.

While it may feel lopsided or a bit too Barbara Walters at first if you're more ears than mouth on the first date, you've already distinguished yourself. You'd be horrified by the men who feel they need to yap, boast, and brag their way through dinner.

RELATED: 3 Things Brilliant Women Do On A First Date That Earn Them A Flirty Phone Call Later

3. 'Wow, you're good at...'

man on a first date with woman Lucky Business | Shutterstock

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Now give us an intelligence compliment. Something about our minds that isn't overly obvious. Something that will make us think. This might be tricky, but once you start looking for it, the answers will be so apparent you'll wonder why you haven't done this your entire dating life.

We're insanely cerebral, us lady folk, and if you can get in our heads, your chances of getting in our pants skyrocket. Maybe you're impressed with our wit. Maybe Jeopardy's on and we're kicking your butt. Are we good storytellers? Whatever it is, let us know.

RELATED: 6 Wildly Effective Flirting Tips From A Master Flirter

4. 'To tell you the truth...'

Yes, please do! Starting a sentence this way makes us feel like your guard is down and you're letting us in on some secret aspect of yourself. And this is our catnip. A study published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that when people answer pointed personal questions — even negative ones — others view them as more trustworthy and are more interested in them than someone who dodges the question. And according to social‑penetration theory, the right level of self‑disclosure — not too much, nor too little — builds trust and intimacy.

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This isn't an invitation to go on and on about yourself, your high school lacrosse glory days, or your foot fetish (best to save this for a later date). Any sort of long-winded bragging is more kitty litter than nip. Know what we mean? 

Confused? Don't be. Learning how to act on a first date means just letting us in a little.

RELATED: 4 Things Deeply Authentic People Do Without Even Trying

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Melissa Noble is a freelance writer and blogger who writes about love, relationships, and trending news stories.

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