Love

3 Sweet Ways To Show Your Partner You're Loyal & They're The Only One For You

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I don’t know of anyone who doesn't want — and expect — loyalty from their partner. A solemn promise, whether before God, friends, family or a Las Vegas Elvis and showgirls, does not make the issue of loyalty a done deal.

In this day and age, keeping our eyes on each other is no easy task. But being loyal in a relationship — faithful, true, and devoted to our partner — is worth its weight in gold.

Loyalty is imperative to a great relationship and a lifetime of love.

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However, loyalty is not necessarily a byproduct of love, commitment, or a marriage license. Many couples begin relationships and marriages relying on their commitment to their vows as a safeguard from relationship betrayals. And so often, even those with the greatest of intentions are caught off guard by innocent temptations and lures.

Emotional affairs are devastating, and they lurk in the shadows of the unsuspecting.

   

   

At a foundational level, loyalty is about committing to an emotional connection. We look to our partner to be the number one person to share our hearts with, no matter what external distractions surround us or what we are feeling.

Without a strong, emotional connection with our partner, we leave ourselves vulnerable in the workplace, at the gym or even at church, to potentially inappropriate and destructive relationships. Whether emotional, spiritual or physical, these outside relationships will wreak havoc on a marriage.

Remaining loyal in our primary love relationship takes more than a promise or commitment. It requires a whole-hearted love relationship.

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The three ways to prove that you're loyal and your partner is the only one for you:

1. Make your partner the priority in your life 

I'm not just talking about giving lip service here. Your partner must feel more important than the kids, work, family, friends and recreation.

Every decision you make must come with consideration of your partner. How will they feel about _____? You fill in the blank.

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2. Create healthy boundaries, everywhere

Be very, very careful with your girls' or guys' nights out! Alcohol, fun music, and great food can provide an ambiance that perhaps should be reserved for your special someone.

Think twice or thrice about how, where, and with whom you exercise. I have had far too many couples come for help who are the victims of gym affairs.

Consider working out with your partner, if possible. It takes creativity to make that happen, but don't rule it out.

Getting hot and sweaty with your partner may add a fun thrill to exercise. Encourage and admire each other as you grow in strength or skill and keep your eyes off those who belong to another.

Business dinners, conferences, and sales calls can be a petri dish for the growth of emotional affairs. Schmoozing to close the deal over a glass of wine or on the golf course can lead to a bigger deal than you intended.

Invite coworkers or a boss to be part of an evening business meeting with someone of the opposite sex. Or change the time and/or venue to keep it all business.

RELATED: 7 Things Couples Should Do Regularly To Prevent Infidelity In Their Relationship

3. Spend quality time connecting

This can be so difficult in our busy lives. Make it happen, come hell or high water.

Go deeper. Get closer. Be open, honest, and transparent. Your partner should be your best friend and your confidant.

And for those who cringe at the mention of "emotion," think of it as science instead.

Attachment science is about emotion and connection.

So let's all, men and women, trust in a deeper and safer connection. It's absolutely vital to reducing conflict and creating a safe, secure, fun, and fulfilling lifetime love.

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Michael W. Regier, Ph.D. is an experienced clinical psychologist, Certified Emotionally Focused Couples Therapist and EFT Supervisor who co-authored Emotional Connection: The Story & Science of Preventing Conflict & Creating Lifetime Love.

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This article was originally published at Michael Regier's website. Reprinted with permission from the author.