5 Painfully Cold Reasons Men Don't Call You Back

The harsh truth about why you never heard from him again.

Three women checking their phones frustrated men haven't called back FluxFactory | Canva

How many times have you waited too long for a man to call and ask you out again after you had an amazing first date? He seemed truly interested, but then you never hear from him again. Why does this happen to so many women when they're dating? And what does it mean about men? (What are they thinking?)

Here are 5 painfully cold reasons men don't call you back:

1. He's having trouble being honest

If you and a man hit it off, trade numbers, talk for a while, or trade emails, but he never seems to take the initiative to see you — then something else is going on. Men often have a hard time sharing the truth about their feelings with women they've just met. Maybe he's already seeing someone else. It's fine to casually ask playfully, "I'm curious since you're kinda cute — are you dating anyone interesting right now?" Invite honesty from men and you'll get it. If you wait and wonder, you'll end up wasting your own time and energy.


RELATED: 15 Signs He's Not Into You

2. He's just looking for a fling

If a man likes you, but he is more interested in a casual encounter and senses you're not that kind of girl, he'll move on — partially out of respect for you (or his selfish desires). In either case, the timing is off. Not calling you back was his way of letting you know where he’s at without having to say it directly. Take heart, in this case, he's doing you a favor by not calling.



RELATED: If He Stopped Calling Or Texting, Do These 7 Things ASAP


3. He was just being polite

Have you ever given your number to a man who asked for it, all the while dreading the idea of ever talking to him again? Men do something similar to women. Sometimes men can enjoy a conversation with you but not be interested in anything more. In this case, a man was just being polite by asking for your number.

4. He lost interest

He was interested in you at first, but something happened along the way to change his mind about you. Maybe he sensed some anxiety from you that creeped him out. Or maybe he sensed a bit of desperation ("You're going to call me, right?") Communicating either anxiousness or desperation early on before a man knows you is a sure attraction-killer.



RELATED: 18 Texts Men Send Women — And What They Mean


5. He lost your number or forgot to call

Yes, sometimes this happens. Men lose your number and can't call. Unfortunately, when it does, women often fill their heads with all kinds of wild stories that only make them feel bad about themselves. Now, what do all these situations have in common? For starters, none of these reasons have anything to do with who you are as a woman. It's your choice to give these situations with men the meaning you want. If you're criticizing yourself because a guy didn't pick up the phone and call you, you’ll end up feeling more negative and overly attached the next time you get on the phone and try and have a casual conversation with him or another man. It just won't feel right to him. And here's the thing: men can sense that and will instantly categorize you as a woman they don't want to be around.

RELATED: 6 Subtle Signs He's About To Ghost You

Christian Carter is a dating coach and author of the e-book Catch Him & Keep Him. He has helped more than three million women become more successful with men, dating, and relationships.