People Raised In The 60s & 70s Can't Stand 10 Ways Younger Generations Parent Their Kids
M_Agency | Shutterstock It's only natural that parenting trends and styles change over time as the world we live in changes, too.
Today's kids aren't facing the same challenges that previous generations did. Still, some people raised in the 60s and 70s can't stand the ways younger generations parent their kids. These individuals who grew up decades ago had a very different upbringing, and they think modern parents' efforts are missing the mark.
Interestingly, the number of parents who claim to be raising their children the way their own parents raised them and the number of parents who are going in a different direction are about the same. Older generations still hold fast to the belief that younger parents just aren't doing it right, though.
People raised in the 60s and 70s can't stand 10 ways younger generations parent their kids
1. Being overprotective
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Many older folks criticize younger parents for being a little too overprotective of their children, and they might not be entirely wrong. Being a "helicopter parent" is often born from a desire to keep kids safe and ensure their needs are met, but it can have some pretty disastrous consequences.
Someone who grew up with overprotective parents may struggle to be independent or be confident in themselves. This isn't a good thing, and older generations know it because they grew up with more breathing room. Their parents didn't constantly hover over them and curate every detail of their lives, but they still turned out fine.
2. Asking for their kids' input
People raised in the 60s and 70s were usually talked at instead of talked to, and they think that's a custom that should continue. They grew up with very little autonomy, so they don't understand why some parents choose to engage with their kids in a way that allows them to share their opinions and sometimes be a part of the decision-making process.
As an adult, it might seem like it's not worth it to have this kind of conversation with a child because listening to their different perspectives can feel tedious. But giving kids the chance to talk is actually vital for their brain development. And, of course, the parent always has the final say. Asking for their kid's opinion doesn't mean they're required to let them eat ice cream for breakfast.
3. Constantly praising them
It's good to let kids know when they did something well, whether it's getting an A on a quiz or being a good friend. But in this era of participation trophies and telling kids how great they are seemingly out of the blue, it's not a good idea to just heap praise on them for the sake of doing so.
Hyping kids up for no specific reason can actually lower their confidence levels, which older people probably understand a bit better. They didn't grow up during a time when parents and other authority figures felt like they needed to constantly tell kids how great they were, so they don't get why it's become common now.
4. No physical punishment
Decades ago, spanking children was not only the norm, but also not really questioned as something that could be harmful. In more recent years, multiple organizations have denounced physical punishment, including the American Psychological Association, which says that "any perceived short-term benefits... do not outweigh the potential detriments."
Older folks would likely argue that punishments like this didn't really have a negative effect on them because they're perfectly fine now, and think that parents today are just too soft and don't discipline children properly, in general. Physical punishment is clearly not a good option, but it's hard to see why when someone experienced it themselves.
5. Not spending enough time outside
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Kids in the 60s and 70s were used to coming home from school and roaming around their neighborhood with friends until the sun went down because there wasn't really anything else they could do. Now, kids rush through their homework as quickly as possible so they can watch YouTube or TikTok videos sooner, and parents hand off iPads to pacify their child when they throw a tantrum. This is something older generations will never be able to wrap their heads around.
Getting outside has been proven to be beneficial for kids because it improves their mental health and gives them a chance to be active. Still, experts say that we're in the middle of a crisis called "nature deficit disorder" because everyone, including children, just doesn't spend enough time outside. Screens are often easier for parents to turn to, but easier doesn't mean better.
6. Gentle parenting
This parenting style has caused a lot of controversy over the last few years, mainly because it's widely misunderstood. Gentle parenting is about acting with empathy to help kids understand why they should or shouldn't do something. As pediatrician Karen Estrella explained, "The idea is to be more like a coach for your kid rather than a punisher."
Some people have misinterpreted gentle parenting as meaning that parents just let their kids do whatever they want without setting any boundaries or teaching them right from wrong. This is inaccurate, but it's still the image many people have of this strategy. It's easy to see why this would sound like absolute insanity to people who grew up with stricter parents who weren't afraid to dole out punishments.
7. Helping kids understand their emotions
Mental health is still heavily stigmatized, but talking about it years ago was basically unheard of. Kids were simply expected to be resilient and find a way to push through any problems they had with minimal help. This makes people who grew up in that environment think that it's not necessary to address feelings and that kids should just be able to tough it out instead.
Now, we know that understanding your emotions is important, even at a very young age. Parents who teach their kids how to regulate their emotions are doing them a favor that will help them be better students and friends. It's not weak, even if older generations see it that way.
8. Not teaching them to be responsible
People who were raised several decades ago learned about taking on responsibility pretty early. Their parents didn't coddle their kids and do everything for them. They expected them to take on age-appropriate responsibilities when the time was right and to be able to take care of themselves.
It makes sense that they would have a problem with modern parenting,. Child psychologist Allie Morford said it's important to teach kids about responsibility early on "to give them some motivation so over time they are getting in the habit of being responsible." Some young parents just do everything for their kids, which may feel like a way to protect them, but doesn't really do them any good.
9. Planning everything around their kids
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Older generations were raised during a time when kids were simply other members of their families. Their parents didn't ignore them when making plans, but they also certainly didn't make sure everything they did catered to them. This has given way to what's known as "child-centered parenting," where parents make all of their choices based on what they think is best for their kids.
This parenting style can produce children who are entitled and think they deserve to always be perfectly accommodated, while also not being very self-reliant. People who grew up in the 60s and 70s can't imagine parents treating their children like the world revolves around them and making every single decision based on their needs, so they're able to more easily recognize these flaws.
10. Not giving them the space to be bored
The minute a child starts to feel bored, they'll announce it to pretty much anyone and everyone who's willing to listen. This makes parents feel like they need to keep their kids constantly entertained, and technology makes it easier to do that now than ever before.
Allowing kids to be bored actually gives them the opportunity to develop their creativity and problem-solving skills. If a kid is really bored, there's a good chance that they'll be able to come up with a way to fill their time. This is what childhood was all about before being surrounded by screens, so older people know it's good to let kids be bored and figure out what to do on their own sometimes.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor's degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.
