If Your Family Had Dinner Together Every Night, You Likely Cling To These 11 Old-Fashioned Values As An Adult
GaudiLab / Shutterstock Growing up, I remember how important family dinners were. We would have big Sunday dinners with our extended family weekly. However, my family unit at home was not the best at dining together. We did as often as we could, but life was hectic. If you grew up breaking bread with your family every night, you likely inherited special old-fashioned values as an adult.
Sitting down at the table is a special ritual. It allows family members to connect. You always knew what was going on in each other’s lives because you’d debrief after each long day. If you have always experienced family dinners, you likely developed excellent communication skills. Perhaps you call your parents more often than the average adult, or consider your siblings your closest friends. You have a clear respect for elders and cherish family time. Family dinners bring old-fashioned values that we cling to as adults because they made such a difference in our childhood.
If your family had dinner together every night, you likely cling to these 11 old-fashioned values as an adult
1. You value family bonds
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Many people say that their family comes first, but for you, it’s actually the truth. You spent a lot of time sitting around the table enjoying their company. You can’t imagine life without catching up with your loved ones. Maintaining healthy familial bonds is a top priority.
Since you spend so much time with your family around the dinner table, you are comfortable sharing anything with them. They are there for you unconditionally. You were able to keep successful family ties from the foundation your family laid. This is a tradition you will carry on with your own family. Your children will likely foster old-fashioned, traditional family bonds, too.
2. The importance of communication skills
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If you grew up feeling comfortable opening up to your family over dinner, you likely developed old-fashioned communication skills. Some people struggle to open up to their families. For someone who shares their life with their parents and siblings every night, communication comes easily not only with your family, but with others around you. People feel comfortable talking to you.
“Effective communication is key to creating stronger, more effective family relationships. When all family members can openly share their thoughts and feelings, it leads to better understanding and respect among everyone,” says Online Courses Australia. “This open communication helps solve disagreements more smoothly and strengthens the connection between family members, ensuring everyone feels valued and heard.”
3. Respect for others
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When you spend a lot of time with your family, respect is something you learn quickly. This old-fashioned value is something that the younger generations have started to stray from. Having dinner with your grandparents and parents all the time taught you that speaking kindly to people is important. They wouldn’t tolerate any nonsense at the table, and now you carry that value with you each day. The respect is extended to everyone, not just family.
You have learned to respect your elders. You admire your older relatives and know that they deserve respect, without question. You have learned so much from your family over your dinners together that you extend it to everyone you know, especially your elders.
4. Responsibility
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I don’t know about you, but my family taught me responsibility as early as I can remember. This is an old-fashioned value I still hold myself to. If you grew up spending every night around the table with your family, you were taught to be responsible. Showing up for your family each night was a responsibility you committed to, and it’s something you’ve clung to as an adult.
“Parents and caregivers want their kids to grow up to be responsible, and they might assume it will naturally develop with age — but responsibility isn’t something that simply happens on its own. Responsibility is a learned skill that children develop over time through practice, modeling, and guidance,” says the Children's Hospital of Colorado. This value was taught to you at a young age, but you carried it into adulthood.
5. Maintaining healthy habits
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Having a meal with your family every day taught you healthy habits. You likely grew up with a healthy relationship with food. Some people inherit difficult eating patterns from their parents. When families gather together to share meals, there is solidarity. It’s a good foundation for healthy habits.
This doesn’t only extend to a healthy relationship with food. If you grew up eating nutritious meals, you will cling to that habit. You will value making food at home and spending time with family. If you grew up enjoying home-cooked food, you don’t feel the need to order out as much. The smell of a freshly cooked meal feels like home, and it’s something that means a lot to you.
6. Emotional intelligence
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If your parents modeled emotional intelligence over family dinners, you will cling to that old-fashioned value through adulthood. When they clearly communicated their feelings, you picked up on the ability. You also felt a strong emotional connection to your family, which allowed you a safe space to process your emotions. Their support allowed you to move forward rather than struggle with what was bringing you down.
“Children and teens often learn emotional intelligence from observing adults. Parents and caregivers can set an example by managing their emotions, demonstrating empathy, and resolving conflicts constructively,” says Chenal Family Therapy. “Family activities can strengthen bonds and teach emotional intelligence. These shared experiences create opportunities to practice empathy, communication, and teamwork.”
7. Resilience
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Sharing a meal with your family each night taught you resilience. You were given a safe and accepting space to share your feelings. They likely encouraged you and approached your feelings without judgment. They were there to hear you out, and that taught you resilience. You always bounced back with the support of your family.
Your family likely boosted your confidence as well. When someone was bullying you at school, you shared the situation at the dinner table. If your parents worked hard to lift you up at your lowest, you learned a strong sense of self-worth. It allowed you to learn how to bounce back and never stay down about yourself.
8. Staying motivated
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The dinner table was a great place for your family to encourage you to do your best. Whether it was about an upcoming school project or praise following a good test score, they were there, motivating and supporting you through it all. If you carried motivation with you into your adult life, you likely mastered the value from your parents cheering you on every day.
“Family is a crucial factor in motivating people at work, but has often been overlooked as family has instead been mostly seen as competing with work for an employee’s time and energy,” says Jochen Menges and Lauren Howe in an article for the University of Cambridge recounting a study conducted by Menges. They draw on research conducted by Jochen in 2017, noting that the study “focused on employees at a low-cost factory for processing coupons in northern Mexico, which found that family can provide energy for one’s work rather than draining such energy. Other research since has corroborated and extended these findings, so we now understand more deeply how family can provide motivation.”
9. Hospitality
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It seems like good hospitality is making a comeback. The younger generations are more interested in hosting dinners and parties. However, this was, and continues to be, an old-fashioned value. When you grew up sharing the dinner table with your family, you became accustomed to good hospitality. Your family fed and treated you well. You then wanted to be that kind of host for your friends.
Are you the house everyone wants to come to for dinner? Do you have nice plates you reserve solely for parties? Is cooking your love language? Then hospitality is important to you, and you likely inherited and continue to cling to that value taught to you by your parents.
10. The joys of a slow life
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The world moves at a mile a minute these days. It feels like obligations and responsibilities overrun our daily lives. One thing that having dinner together with your family every night taught you is the ability to slow down where it counts. You always made time for this nightly tradition. Even when homework was piling up, and your parents had a long day at work, this was not an optional event.
Taking the time to slow down and connect with your loved ones at the end of the day makes a difference. You inherited the old-fashioned value of putting yourself and your family first. Hustle culture may have you convinced that you always have to be working. However, spending so much time around the table taught you that it’s more important to slow down and appreciate the people in your life.
11. A solid routine
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I have a few memories of my nightly routine with my family. While we didn’t always dedicate time to share a meal, we did as often as we could. On those nights, it would be to come home from school, do your homework, spend time together eating dinner, and end the night with some TV time. Does this sound familiar? This routine taught me everything I needed to know. I am now a person who has to keep a routine and stick to it.
Do you hate spontaneity? Sure, sometimes it can be fun, but often it can feel overwhelming. You may have clung to set routines because of the old-fashioned values taught to you by your parents. When they made sure to keep you on a positive routine, you saw the benefits. Now, you likely keep a strict schedule. One that includes gathering around the table with your family for dinner.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
