Self

6 Ways To Quit Getting In Your Own Way And Start LIVING Again

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single girl

“Whether you believe you can or you cannot, you are right.” - Henry Ford.

It's a classic quote, simple in its tone and with a clear message. You hold the key to your goals.

It is not enough to want to achieve your goals. You have to believe they are possible for you. Why? If you don’t believe they are possible, you are likely to get in your own way — probably without realizing it — through your thoughts and actions.

Have you ever had a goal in mind that made you smile? But minutes, hours or even days later ,you realize the tasks you had committed to do to move towards the goal no longer sounded so fabulous or feasible. If you’re nodding, join the club! Been there, got the t-shirt ... t-shirts actually.

There are some reasons why your excitement may have ended at the first opportunity. There could be a touch of procrastination, a sudden feeling of being overwhelmed by the goal itself or what you will have to do to achieve it, or perhaps the stream of messages in your subconscious tells you it’s just not possible. It limits your beliefs.

Bottom line, you have to identify what's getting in the way and work through it in order to move on. Limiting beliefs are not the easiest things to unpick but unpick them you must! It's time for change.

Do some journaling. Grab a good old notebook and pen and start to capture the thoughts and feelings you have.  Listen for any and all inner negative talk such as "I can’t", " it's not possible", "not good enough" or "it won't help". Identify the feelings you experience, from excitement to having butterflies or feeling anxious. Then, you can focus on solutions.

For example, if you notice you are telling yourself something is not possible for you, question why it’s not. Is it due to a past experience when something didn’t go your way? Is it something someone has told you? Is it the fear of trying and failing?

Recognize how that belief limits you. When you tell yourself something is not possible for you, how does that stop you from experiencing life and bringing what you want in to your life?

Getting to the root cause of the beliefs will help you unpick them. We forget how the spoken word influences us and how our experiences hardwire us. They can help us or hold us back. However, change is possible when you decide to learn new ways of thinking, being and doing, and new neural pathways develop through your consistent efforts. 

To stop getting in your own way follow these 6 steps:

​1. Be clear on what you want in your life.

Most people can identify what they don't want, but who wants to waste their energy on those things?

2. Decide how you feel about what you want in your life.

For example, you may want to feel full of energy. You'll feel like your health is the best it has ever been.

3. Create beliefs that will support what you want and how you want to feel.

For example, start thinking, 'I will be more productive and do more for my family when I am healthy.'

4. Reinforce these new beliefs throughout your day and allow yourself to feel the good feelings associated to them.

Your old beliefs may surface. Don't fight them. Acknowledge them for what they are — old — and focus on the new.

5. Take small steps every day toward what you want.

Always stretch yourself just enough to push your comfort zone.

6. Never give up!

Live the life of your dreams.

​Believe it, create it, and ultimately, stop getting in your own way!

Yvonne Bignall is a personal development coach living in the United Kingdom.