How To Use Magic To Attract Your Soulmate (Even If You're Not A Witch)

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Can You Really Use Magick To Attract Your Soul Mate?

Are you dreaming of attracting a soulmate? Are you pining for the one who got away and want to reconnect? Are you frustrated with the same old methods of searching, and long for something more mystical?

How about trying a love spell using candle magick?

By practicing candle magick, you are harnessing the power of fire to bring about the change you desire. A candle contains all the basic elements earth, wind, fire, and water. Earth is represented in the wax, water the melted wax, the flame is fire, and the air is the smoke. How awesome is that?

Many cultures, traditions, and religions use candles in their ceremonies. There is nothing new here. Unwittingly, almost everyone’s first act of candle magick took place when were very young, blowing out the candles on our birthday cake and making a wish!

Some believe that the tradition of birthday candles came from the ancient Greeks paying tribute to the moon God Artemis. They would bake a round cake and light it with candles. If the candles were blown out with one breath, your wish would come true.

Many ancient cultures also believed that the smoke from the candles carried their prayers to the heavens.

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My friend Julie tried her hand at this ancient ritual when she was at her wits end in the love department. You see, she had broken her own rule and dated her neighbor, who lived directly across the street, although "date" is probably not the most accurate term.

She and Sergio were the best of buds for years, hanging together at neighborhood BBQs, watching movies at his house on his giant flat-screen TV while drinking beer and shots of tequila, ribbing each other about political views, and chatting on the street corner under the moonlight while Romeo, her Chihuahua did his business before bedtime.

Julie had a major crush but kept it under wraps since Sergio didn’t really seem interested in that way.

Everything was fine until Sergio invited Julie to go camping in his RV…with one bed. Blindsided, she was totally confused. Was he interested in her beyond friendship or was this just a neighbor inviting a friend? She was too shy to ask what his motives were so she agonized over what to do. The stakes were high since if things didn’t work out, their friendship could be compromised. That would devastate her.

She decided to take the risk and the first day things went well, including a walk on the beach and dinner around a campfire. The second night, however, a mixture of tequila, a heated political debate, and awkward sex twisted the experience into a fiasco she wanted to forget.

As soon as Sergio pulled the RV into his driveway, Julie jumped out, mumbled "Wmmmm…well…g’-bye…" and never heard from Sergio again, until a few months later.

I got the whole story when I picked Julie up to go to a class on how to use pendulums.

"He’s been texting me," Julie admitted.

"Really? What does he say? Is he sorry for the way he treated you? I mean, just to never speak to you again, that is pretty harsh!"

Julie scrunched down in the seat, motioning for me to get going. "Marla…last night, he texted me a photo of his privates."

I gasped. "WHAT?" Oh my god, that was just plain crazy!

"What do you think it means?" She sat up again after we turned off of her street. "Why would he do that? Is he interested in me? I mean, why would a guy do that?"

"Well, that is so rude, Julie, I would block his number, I mean that is totally inappropriate, how gross!"

"Really? It would bother you if a guy sent you a text like that? I don’t think it’s a big deal…I just wonder what it means?"

"JULIE, if a guy ever sent me a photo of his junk…" Though driving, I turned to give her a meaningful look. “I would never want to see him again."

Her responding expression said, "Are you for real?"

I didn’t want to preach or make Julie feel like I was judging her, so I just said, "I go for a more sophisticated, elegant type of man. Anthony Weiner antics are not my style AT ALL!"

"Gawd! I just want to stop thinking about him all the time. I’ve started drinking margaritas alone in my bedroom at night as I peek out of the blinds, staring at his house. I’m going to have Hovik dress a candle for me, one that will make me forget all about Sergio."

Hovik is a powerful warlock who works at a place called "The Green Man Store". Julie and I are in total awe of him. He dresses candles with oils, herbs, sparkles, and magical intention and incantations. I wondered if this magic could be powerful enough to override Julie’s feelings for Sergio?

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Intentions are powerful things and Julie’s intention was stuck inside her, but if Hovik took that intention and gave it a specific candle that was just for Julie, it gave her an outward and visible form, bringing Hovik, the candle, and Julie — three focal points instead of one — into the task of forgetting Sergio, well, it could be just what she needed!

Julie marched up to the apothecary in the back of the store. I felt like I’d stepped into a Harry Potter book. Hovik, 30-something with a full head of chestnut hair, dressed in black and wore round, wooden studs in both ears. He stood behind an ornately carved wood bar. Dozens of jars filled with mysterious herbs, oils, and potions lined the shelves.

Julie explained her obsession to Hovik, asking if he would please dress a candle for her that would make it all stop.

Hovik nodded with assurance, as if women all over Los Angeles flocked to his apothecary, attempting to forget the lovers that had spurned them. He selected a crimson candle from one of the shelves, took a sharpened stone knife and began to carve Julie’s intentions into the wax.

By 10:15 that night, my hubby was at work, and I was lying in bed, watching a rerun of Seinfeld. A text came in from Julie: "Marla, R U up?"

I dialed her number. "What’s going on?"

She sounded a bit frantic. "Okay, I let the candle burn for the past six hours and now I am supposed to bury it at a crossroads…"

I turned off the TV right at the part where George’s fiancée, Susan, keels over whilst licking envelopes for their wedding invitations. Julie had my full attention.

"What are you talking about?"

"Hovik told me that I needed to burn the candle for six hours straight while meditating on the outcome that I want and then bury it at a crossroads after dark."

"Does that mean an intersection? Where are you going to go?"

"I don’t know. Am I just supposed to grab a shovel and dig a hole in one of my neighbor’s yards?"


"I mean, what if someone comes out of the house? What do I tell them? Oh, um… Hi, my name is Julie, and I live down the street. A warlock dressed a candle and put a spell put on it, and now I just need to bury it in your yard because you live at my nearest cross street…heh…heh…?"

"Yeah, that sounds good. I’m sure they’d understand. The cops too."

"I’ll figure something out…"

"Julie, please be careful, I mean really…don’t go too far, and call me as soon as you’re done…."

I was concerned about Julie. Her antics felt familiar. I once set a guy’s photo on fire and then ran over it with my car…but I was 24 years old at the time.

Sergio eventually did come back to Julie, and they had some good times again until he dumped her for the perky, younger gal who moved in next door. 

Julie was crushed. I know that her advice to us all would be, "Be careful what you wish for!"

So, your best bet is to use candle magick to attract the right partner for you. If you trust and leave it up to the universe, then you will highly increase your chances of the spell working. Using magick to summon a wonderful, healthy relationship instead of manipulating an unwitting person will produce a positive outcome.

How To Cast A Candle Spell For Love

Candle magick is fun and easy; you only need a candle and fire to light it with! Choose a plain unused candle. Using a second-hand candle is not advised as it has the energy and vibrations of previous use.  

Any candle can be used in your magical spell casting, but beeswax candles are more powerful. If you want to get fancy, you can make your own candle. Candle magick can be extremely elaborate or quite simple.

Before performing candle magick, you should cleanse and anoint your candle. To cleanse it you can simply rub it with a little rubbing alcohol. Before burning the candle, it has to be oiled or dressed. By touching the candle during the dressing ritual, you are charging it with your energy and also focusing your desire/wish into the wax.

To dress your candle, you can simply rub some pure essential oil on it, focusing on your intent. Lilac, rose, and jasmine are all good oils for love. You can also do as Hovik did for Julie and carve symbols or initials into the candle — things that represent the result you wish to achieve.

If you choose to use a colored candle, pink represents love and red is fire and passion.

Be as specific about your goal as you can in a thought or short sentence. Using your goal, create a simple spell to chant. Chant your spell while you light the candle to release its energy. Repeat your chant as long as feels needed.  

Never blow out a candle, if you cannot let it burn all night, then pinch out or snuff the candle flame. If you can let the candle burn down completely, then make sure it is not a fire hazard. Put it in the sink, shower, or tub.

And finally, keep your candle magick private. This is for you alone. There could be people who will not believe in it or try to tear you down.

Have fun with it and create something amazing.

Here’s to magick!

RELATED: You’ll Meet Your Soulmate When You Change Your Point of View

Marla Martenson is a matchmaker, author, Reiki practitioner and radio show host. She helps people connect with their soulmate through self-love and healing. To discover how to truly love yourself, the real secret to finding love, join Marla’s private Facebook group, Love Yourself, Love Your Life. And read more about Marla’s spiritual adventures in her memoir, The Buddha Made Me Do It, A Field Guide To EnLITEnment.