Am I Just A Booty Call? 10 Signs He's Using You (Sorry!)

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am i just a booty call
Love, Sex

First of all, let me state for the record, I have NO issue with the concept of booty call. If both partners are consenting and know exactly what they’ve signed up for — great.

However, it seems as though women can’t see the forest for the trees inside the booty call at times.

Meaning, the man involved knows exactly what it is. He defines it by his unwillingness to take the relationship further. Her friends even know what it is.

However, she wants to think there is something more serious going on — or at least hopes there might be someday if she hangs out long enough.

It used to be incredibly simple. The rules around the booty call were pretty straight forward. Now, though, things aren't quite as simple as they used to be.

Believe it or not, there are several high-bred booty call varieties on the market. The thing that remains the same is this; very frequently the female partner is in total denial about the status of the relationship.

So, if you're wondering "am I just a booty call?" use the red flags below to help you know:

1. "Dating" just ends up turning into sex.

You know you might be a booty call if your “dates” don’t involve date-like activities.

You aren’t going to dinner and a movie, or a concert, or a ballgame. He may be doing those things, but you aren’t included.

Also, you may be doing those things, but he doesn’t care to tag along.

RELATED: 6 Kinds Of Booty Calls Every Woman Should Experience At Least Once

2. Holidays and special events are off the table.

You know you might be a booty call if you aren’t celebrating holidays and events together.

He might show up for your birthday, at about 11:45 pm, but he didn’t show up for the birthday party your best friend threw for you and he didn’t bring a gift unless it was lingerie or a sex toy.

3. He's never there for you when you need him.

You know you might be a booty call if he disappears when you need support. He doesn’t make a scene about disappearing, he just doesn’t come around. He’s busy.

Like when your grandmother passes and all you hear from him is maybe a text or two for a couple of weeks.

4. Texting is the only way you can get ahold of him.

Speaking of texting, you know you might be a booty call if your primary form of communication outside of the bedroom is texting or some other form of electronic communication.

RELATED: The One Problem With Being His Booty Call

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5. You've never met his family.

You know you might be a booty call if you haven’t met a single member of his family or his best friend’s wife or significant other. Unless his family lives across the country, you should cross paths with one of them at least occasionally if you’re in a real relationship.

Very complex booty calls might have random contact with a friend. However, you won’t likely be included in group activities.

6. Everything turns back to sex.

You know you might be a booty call if he never sends flowers, gives presents, or sends emails that don’t involve a discussion about the next time you might hook up.

7. He leaves right after sex.

You know you might be a booty call if he never, EVER stays the night and you rarely see him before 9:30 p.m.

8. He's seeing other people.

You know you might be a booty call him he frequently references other women in conversation. He may not say he’s dating them, but he definitely lets you know you aren’t the only woman in his life or the only thing he’s looking at.

RELATED: 5 Signs Your Booty Call Boo Is Really Your Soulmate

9. He doesn't make it official.

You know you might be a booty call if he hasn’t changed his Facebook status or removed his Match.com profile.

Now I know it’s customary in some circles not to do that in the beginning stages of a relationship. However, the beginning stages of a relationship do not last weeks and weeks or months and months.

10. He's only looking for sex.

You know you might be a booty call if he more or less TELLS you so. He really enjoys having sex with you but he flat out says he isn’t ready to be exclusive and you know he’s still on the market.

When he tells you he's not interested in a relationship... take him at his word.

The thing to understand is this, much like being the other woman rarely results in getting the man, being the booty call also rarely results in getting the man.

If you might be the booty call and what you’ve got right now is just fine with you, then you’re in luck because he’s likely to stay in it just the way it is, that is until one of you finds someone else.

However, if you’ve got that heart pull that says you really dig this guy and you want more then a roll in the sheets a couple of times a week, then you need to get honest with yourself and cut the cord.

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