Photo: Nikkimeel / Shutterstock
Create a connection that will last a lifetime.
By Lianne Avila
Last updated on Jan 12, 2024
One of the best things to do as a couple is to create your own traditions and rituals.
Rituals of connection are core to positive, healthy relationships. The small things you do as a couple create shared meaning and intimacy, which means there is a good chance your relationship is healthy, stable, and happy.
Consider how you and your partner can do tiny but meaningful things together to deepen intimacy and improve your emotional connection.
Here are 21 small things to do together as a couple that will bring you closer than ever.
1. Have breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and/or coffee.
It's easy to miss out on having meals together when life gets busy. But sharing meals, even if it's just once a day, gives you the opportunity to connect with one another, talk about your day, and improve communication in the process. Put away your phones, turn off the TV, and simply enjoy each other's company.
2. Host guests at your home.
When you share your space with your loved ones, you create opportunities to build a sense of community, all while strengthening your connection as a couple. Set aside a weekend date to have friends and family over, cooking and drinking, and making good memories.
3. Work out or go for a walk.
While it's always a great idea to exercise, doing it with a partner makes the challenge even more fun. It shows that you support each other in your goals, whether it's at the gym, running, or doing other physical activities.
4. Take care of each other when you're sick.
"In sickness and in health" rings true every day. During times of illness, make your partner soup, bring them medicine, and offer comfort in any other ways you can. When you do this as a couple, even when one of you isn't feeling 100%, it builds intimacy and trust.
5. Renew your spirits with self-reflection and self-care.
Of course, you should put your partner and your relationship first, but self-care is just as important. Carve out some time to write, read, journal, or practice mindfulness together. When you do, you encourage individual growth and show your support for one another.
6. Go to concerts, plays, and cultural events.
Strengthen your connection to become closer than ever by enjoying a night of entertainment. Attend a concert, musical, or local exhibition to really understand one another's tastes.
Photo: Paulo Marcelo Martins / Pexels
7. Apologize or repair feelings after an argument.
While conflicts and arguments will no doubt arise in any relationship, the way couples approach it speaks to how connected they are. By taking the time to truly apologize and discuss each of your feelings after an argument, you reinforce your commitment to one another.
8. Go dancing.
Not only is dancing playful and exciting, but it's extremely intimate in the right setting. Connect mentally and physically on the dance floor, whether it's at a bar, in a dancing lesson, or in the street outside your home!
9. Do charity work.
Volunteering has benefits of its own, but when you share that experience with your partner, you're strengthening your bond in the process. Make a difference in someone's life by working with local charities, creating a positive impact on others as well as your relationship.
10. Attend religious services or celebrate festivals and holidays.
If you or your partner have a religious faith, or even one that is more spiritual, tap into that by participating in cultural events, festivals, holidays, or services with one another. You're creating a sense of tradition and opening up opportunities to connect on a deeper level.
11. Go to the movies.
When was the last time you went on a movie date? See what's playing at the nearest theater, grab the popcorn, and watch a movie together to unwind.
12. Watch television.
Not feeling traveling to the movies? Plop yourselves on the couch, put on a binge-worthy show, and sit back and watch together. It's a great way to unwind, relax, and just enjoy being with one another.
13. Play card and board games.
Whether it's a game you've played for years or a new one you just bought, take time to connect in a playfully fun way. Playing games together as a couple gives you a chance to compete in a friendly way, while growing closer in the process.
14. Take vacations, weekend getaways, or do local travel.
It's always good to get away every now and then from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Pack your bags and take a trip, even if it's just for the weekend or to a location nearby. You're creating lasting memories by going somewhere new together.
15. Make art as a couple.
Even if neither of you are particularly creative or artistic, use this time to create something together. It could be painting, drawing, crafting, or even writing. No matter what you choose, making art is a small thing to do together as a couple that will let you express yourselves.
16. Lay in bed.
Physical intimacy is extremely important in any romantic relationship, but that doesn't necessarily involve making love. Spend a few hours in bed together, cuddling, touching, and just being close to one another.
17. Celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, and other special moments.
By celebrating milestones and special moments, you're reinforcing just how important you are to each other. Give thoughtful gifts, express gratitude for the life you share, and maybe even plan a surprise for your partner.
Photo: cottonbro studio / Pexels
18. Spend time away from one another.
Spending quality time together is essential in healthy relationships, but it's also important to spend time apart, pursuing your own interests and growing as individuals. After all, if you don't have independence and freedom, you can't expect to have balance.
19. Reunite after time apart.
After spending some time apart, whether it's because of work or personal issues, make your reunion as amazing and loving as possible. Take some time to discuss your individual experiences, and really enjoy being together once again.
20. Go to bed together.
Set a bedtime routine so you're brushing your teeth, washing your face, and climbing into bed with one another. End the day on a good note, and take a quiet moment to share your thoughts from the day before falling asleep.
21. Wake one another up sweetly.
When morning comes, begin the day with a sweet kiss, words of encouragement, or a nice snuggle. By doing this, you're showing that the affection and emotional connection is still there, no matter how long you've been together.
More for You:
Lianne Avila is a licensed marriage and family therapist with a practice in San Mateo, CA, and is the founder of Lessons for Love. Her work has been featured in Psych Central, BRIDES, and Prevention.