Victims or targets sometimes downplay the violence and damage to their self-esteem, hoping it will just go away or at least get better with time. Bullying and aggressive actions rarely stop without some sort of intervention.
Bullying is not strictly a behavior of the young and not all bullying involves fighting. Bullying, in all forms, is an attempt to steal power from someone else, thus empowering the bully. There is no single reason why some people attempt to take advantage of others, but those who intimidate and manipulate often use aggressive tactics.
There doesn't appear to be a single type of person who becomes the target of bullies or the victims of their aggressive attacks. However, you may want to check out these six types of bullies and their methods of intimidation to see if you can recognize when and if you have been the victim of a bully and their emotional abuse.
1. The Physical Bully
- Hits, kicks, pushes, spits, and/or intimidates
- Steals possessions
- Forces others do things they don't want to do themselves
2. The Verbal Bully
- Engages in name-calling, humiliating, teasing, and insulting
- Uses sarcasm and pointed jokes to point out flaws in their targets personality
- Makes degrading comments about victims' dress or appearance
3. The Non-Verbal Bully
- Mimics physical activity and/or disabilities of others
- Makes offensive gestures and facial expressions
- Turns their head or body away when victim is speaking (giving the cold shoulder)
- Uses threatening body language (such as standing in the victim's personal space and using postures that make they themselves look physically larger than their victim)
4. The Social Bully
- Refuses to talk or acknowledge their victim
- Spreads rumors or innuendoes about others
- Makes someone behave or dress in a manner that the bully determines
- Invites others to an event or party in front of victim, while excluding the victim
- Talks directly to the victim about a social event they have been excluded from
5. The Sexual Bully
- Engages in unwanted physical contact
- Makes vulgar remarks and gestures toward others
- Calls others by sexual names or remarking on sexual orientation
- Takes photos or videos of their victim in a compromising situation and threatens to share it
- Manipulates situations to gain sexual favors
6. The Cyber-Bully or Technological Bully
- Sends mean, vulgar or threatening messages using cell phones or through text and instant messaging
- Texts or forwards private messages to others
- Sends unflattering photos to others or sexually suggestive photos to the victim
- Pretends to be someone else to make their victim look bad
- Intentionally excludes someone from an online group
- Posts derogatory or inflammatory messages on social media sites
- Impersonates someone else when chatting through instant messaging to gain information or humiliate
While researching my latest book on cyberbullying, I have found bullies almost never stop their aggressive and abusive behavior without intervention. Bullies DO NOT stop bullying; they just get bigger and more devious in their approach.
If you recognize that you have been bullied in the past, empower yourself now. Set boundaries and become more assertive in your interpersonal relationships. You can do it, I have confidence in you.
This article was originally published at http://www.cyberbullyinghelp.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.