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How to be the exact kind of woman every man wants.
By Christian Carter
Last updated on Feb 10, 2016
If you want to win the right man's heart, you need to know what it is that makes a man go from just feeling casual about dating you, to wanting and needing you on a deeper level. I'm going to take you inside a man's mind you so you understand what it takes to trigger this kind of connection. And I'm talking about a real man — one who is mature and grounded on a physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual level. They're on a great path and open to growing on a deeply personal level. That's exactly why you're on this site: to learn how to find a quality kind of guy, a real man looking for a real relationship. So what does a mature, REAL man want in a woman?
Here are 4 things every man wants in a woman, no question about it:
1. He wants a woman who is playful
Men love to be active and to play. They were raised to express themselves and connect with those around them through action. Unfortunately, too many women seem to forget this and want to talk their way into a man's heart. But men don't "feel it" for you because of what you say. It's not your words that make a man attracted to you; it's the experiences you create with him. Watch or play sports together, be competitive in casual games like ping pong, and even add a little teasing and sarcasm here and there. You'll really ramp up the attraction and interest.
2. He wants a woman who is independent
Lots of women mistakenly believe that men are looking for a "weaker" woman who will make them feel like they're smarter and more powerful. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Real men want a woman who inspires them because she has great things going on in her own life. They want a woman who has her own purpose other than being in a relationship.
A great guy isn't intimidated by independence and success. What matters to a man is that a woman still has space in her life for a great relationship and is grounded and present when she's with him. The best way to communicate this to a man is to stay busy in your own life and not suddenly make him your world. Don't drop your own interests, responsibilities, and friends just to be with him.
3. He wants a woman who is emotionally mature
A woman who has the maturity to not blame or criticize a man for what she's feeling, but to share her feelings in an honest and authentic way that helps a man better understand her, will be attractive to a man. How a woman handles her emotions is one of the most important things men look for when deciding whether or not to get serious with a woman. If she lets her emotions get out of control, this is a big red flag to him. On the other hand, if she can present her feelings to him in a calm, non-dramatic manner, she will win his respect and make him feel like she's the kind of woman who will be a real partner to him. He'll see that she can handle things with a cool head rather than become a damsel in distress he has to rescue.
4. He wants a woman he's intensely attracted to
Men aren't as scared of commitment and relationships as they are scared of being in a relationship with a woman where there's no passion and attraction. A common way women accidentally kill the attraction men might be feeling is by either trying too hard to get them to like them or by acting like the relationship is too serious too soon. Relax and let things happen naturally. Make sure you do and say things that interject fun and humor into your relationship from the very start. There's nothing more appealing to a man than a great woman who knows how to relax and have fun. You can do this through playful teasing, flirting, humor, and being unpredictable (in a good way).
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Christian Carter is a dating coach and author of the e-book Catch Him & Keep Him. He has helped more than three million women become more successful with men, dating, and relationships.