The #1 Misconception We Have About Emotional Infidelity


Emotional infidelity may seem harmless at first, but it's just as dangerous as physical cheating.

Are you wondering about emotional infidelity—what it is and if it's okay if you're in a relationship? You're not alone. Many people think about infidelity only on the physical level. It's true to say that many people don't even believe there's such a thing as emotional infidelity. Of course, they're wrong.

First of all, let's define emotional infidelity. This classically occurs when someone in a committed relationship or marriage forms an emotional attachment with a third person outside of the relationship. This may seem trivial to begin with, but it can escalate and become physical.

So, if you've formed a friendship that you cannot tell your spouse/partner about, then you should seriously ask yourself why? To be perfectly honest, you should not have a relationship/friendship with anyone that you cannot openly and honestly discuss with your partner. The minute your partner is shut out of any part of your life there is a potential for distance. With distance comes real and potential problems to your relationship.

This is not to say that you have to tell your spouse/partner about every single part of your day. The distinction here is that you are deliberately hiding a friendship with a third person, and hiding the nature of that friendship from your spouse/partner.

What you should also consider, when it comes to emotional infidelity, is how your partner would feel if they ever found out. Perhaps you are sharing intimate details of your life with your partner with your secret friend? How would your partner feel about that? Knowing that any problems the two of you are having are being openly discussed by you with someone outside of your relationship? Not only that, but someone who could quickly become a destructive element within your relationship?

Emotional infidelity might seem like a little bit of harmless fun at first, but it can quickly and dangerously escalate into something that can seriously threaten your relationship. You will find that your partner will have picked up on the fact that you're even more distant than usual, and this is because you are sharing with someone else. Pretty soon, you're thinking about that someone else more and more.

Once this happens it can often be a short step towards a full on physical relationship and that's why any emotional attachment that your partner does not know about it so dangerous. If there is a problem in your relationship, then it is best sorted out between you and your partner. If need be, with professional outside help, or perhaps even with trusted friends.

Make no mistake—emotional infidelity is as dangerous as physical infidelity.