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This is basic manners.
By Isaac Serna-Diez — Written on May 22, 2022
A woman and her husband got in a bit of an argument when his mother was planning on staying at their place for a month and he asked her to be more respectful of her presence.
Everyone has routines that they like to follow and clothes that they like to wear in order to be a little more comfy and cozy in their own homes, but what about when that outfit is your birthday suit?
This woman doesn’t believe she should have to wear more clothes for her mother-in-law.
The Redditors that people sometimes find solace in relying on for their unbiased, based-on-experience opinions, failed her today when she posted to the subreddit “r/AmItheA--hole” (AITA) and they all responded with “You’re the A--hole” (YTA).
As things typically go on this subreddit, people tell their stories of their arguments with their spouse, their family, their friends, and sometimes even their children.
Almost always, the fierce Redditors have a strong nose for justice and more often than not hand out “Not the A--hole” (NTA) ratings, but not this time.
“For some background, my husband (36M) and I (27F) have been married for a little over a year, and we recently bought a nice house,” she starts her story.
“It has a pool and a hot tub and one of the things I've enjoyed is unwinding after a long day.”
Her definition of unwinding is going around naked to the pool and hot tub, sometimes even sunbathing on the pool chairs in the nude as well.
This is all totally fine in the comforts of your own home with your husband, and for her, even her immediate family.
“My family has always been very comfortable with nudity,” she explains, “so I find it really irritating and completely unnecessary to be told to restrict some perfectly harmless things.”
Only, the rules change when the people around you are no longer just your husband or your immediate family — especially when it’s your in-laws.
“Now, my husband's old mom who is from a different world (a southern lady who is super prudish and very passive-aggressive) is staying with us for a month,” she continues.
Understandably, the husband doesn’t want his mother to see his wife naked and asked her to stop doing these things in the nude.
“I flat out refused,” she wrote.
“I told [him] she's a guest in our house and I won't be rude or inappropriate, but I am not going to change things, especially when it's going to cut off a crucial way in which I relax and unwind. I genuinely think my mental health and work will suffer if this avenue is cut off,” referring to the time she spends at the pool or hot tub.
But many people argued that if these things were going to seriously cause her mental health to suffer, then she had much bigger problems.
“Not wanting to see people naked isn’t ‘prudish’,” one person responded. “I would draw the line with the dressing up part or needing to wear a bra. But it’s not unreasonable to not want you to be naked.”
Others brought up that you’re supposed to compromise whenever guests are over all of the time anyway.
You’re sacrificing rooms in your home, blankets, pillows, food, free space, routines, time, and whatever else those guests might need from you.
If your husband doesn’t want his mother to see you naked, or she expressed discomfort in seeing you naked, you should probably just wear a bikini out of respect for your guest.
Isaac Serna-Diez is a writer who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics. Follow him on Twitter here.