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Woman Tells Her Parents Her Brother's Son Isn't Biologically His After They Favored Him Over Her Adopted Kids

Photo: NDAB Creativity/Shutterstock
grandparents with granddaughter

Sibling rivalries go back to the beginning of time. They typically stem from the perceived ‘favoritism’ of one child over the other.

Even as adults, we tend to notice when our parents seem to treat our children differently than they treat our brothers' or sisters’ children.

One woman took to the subreddit, AITA (Am-I-The-A—hole), to find out if she was wrong in spilling a tightly held family secret in a moment of anger.

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In the beginning, all of the children were treated the same way.

She starts with a little bit of family history, telling readers that she has three adopted children, all of whom have been treated very well by her parents.

According to the Redditor, “They’ve never mentioned to me or my husband, or to the kids, anything about having a problem that I adopted instead of having biological children.”

The poster goes on to explain that her brother has a three-month-old son that he and his wife conceived via a sperm donor.

Her parents have no idea that their youngest grandchild is not their son’s biological offspring. The woman’s sister-in-law told her about it but held her to secrecy.

Initially, the woman notes that all of the grandchildren were treated equally as babies.

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She began to notice some favoritism toward the ‘biological’ grandchild.

She says that she was surprised when her parents started talking about how excited they were to celebrate their first Christmas with their very first biological grandchild.

According to the Redditor, “They did a big expensive holiday photoshoot with my brother, his wife, and his son, something they’ve never done with my kids.”

She adds context, stating that her parents requested the shoot, not her brother. To add fuel to the fire, she alleges that her parents casually mentioned the gifts they had gotten the children.

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By her calculations, they spent more on their newborn grandson than they did on all three of her children.

She recalled that her parents had never bought many gifts for her kids even as babies.

The woman claims they told her, “There was no point buying expensive things for babies for Christmases or birthdays because they wouldn’t remember it, and they’d rather spend the money when they’re a little older.”

In her opinion, her family is experiencing a clear case of favoritism and she believes it is because her parents mistakenly believed that her brother’s son was their only blood-related grandchild.

She alleges, “I pointed this out to them and said it bothers me, they denied treating them differently, they said I was being weird about money.”

But for her, it’s not about money at all — she is truly concerned about what she sees as preferential treatment.

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She dropped a bombshell that was not her secret to tell.

After her parents dismissed her allegations, the woman says, “I told them the truth about my nephew.”

The doting grandparents were thankful for her honesty but furious at her brother for lying to them.

They accused him of “tricking” them and giving them “false hope” about finally having a grandkid that would carry on the family bloodline — confirming the woman's concerns.

Her husband believes that she did the right thing by exposing the “lies and secrets” and that if her parents felt the same about all the kids, it wouldn’t matter.

But her brother is another story.

He rightfully told his bitter sister that the revelation wasn’t hers to share and feels that she has fractured his son’s relationship with his parents.

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Readers are conflicted about who is wrong in this situation.

If your assumption is that the internet backs the Redditor who exposed her parent’s favoritism, you would be wrong.

Though most readers acknowledge that the grandparents are making a difference between the children, overall, people condemned the way she handled the situation.

One person commented, “It wasn't your secret to tell. You were wrong to do it that way. But grandparents are super AH (a—holes), and so is your brother.”

Another Redditor countered, posting, “I mean let's be real here, she only spilled the beans out of spite. It's not like her children were in mortal danger from the grandparents.”

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NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, and author of seven books. She covers lifestyle and entertainment and news, as well as navigating the workplace and social issues.

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