People Who Bounce Back Quickly After Losing Their Job Usually Do These 10 Small Things First
LOOK | Canva Losing or getting fired from your job can seem like the end of the world. You might feel disbelief, anger, sadness, uncertainty, fear, and even panic. Research has shown these are all normal emotions given the situation.
Amid rising unemployment rates, it's easy to lose hope and wallow in low self-esteem, but people who bounce back quickly tend to do a few small things first to regain confidence and take back their lives.
People who bounce back quickly after losing their job usually do these 10 small things first:
1. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job give themselves time to mourn
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A loss is a loss. Losing your job can cause you to doubt your abilities and put you on shaky ground for the next opportunity. You might even feel paralyzed.
On the other end of the spectrum, I sometimes see clients jump into job search mode right when they’re not ready. They haven’t dealt with their loss. I don't suggest taking too much time, but a few days or weeks to decompress is healthy and wise.
Allow yourself to feel whatever emotions come up for you. Recognize you won't feel these things forever, and you are not alone. Studies have recommended that if you take some time to grieve the loss of your job, your future in that organization, and your colleagues, you'll be on the path to healing. Skip this step, and you'll risk holding onto resentment.
Hold onto the positive experiences you had. In time, the negative ones become a distant memory. Most of all, give yourself some compassion.
2. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job lean on their loved ones
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Share your job loss news with those closest to you. I've heard stories of newly terminated employees dressing up, leaving the house every day, and pretending they are going to work because they can't face telling their families.
Research has suggested there is nothing to be gained from shame about job loss. Your loved ones might have their own reaction to your job loss, and it's normal for them to have insecurities. In a time of feeling a loss of control, what you can control is what and how you tell your family.
Let them know you’re getting support, perhaps in the form of severance, benefits continuance, and outplacement services, and that you can work through this challenging time together. Your job loss may end up being a bonding opportunity for your relationship. Resist the urge to shelter your kids, also. Teach them about bouncing back and solving problems.
Gradually widen your circle over the coming weeks. You’ll be bound to find others who have experienced similar circumstances, and you’ll realize you’re not alone. People have a natural inclination to help, too, so when you're ready, take them up on their offers.
3. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job ask for help
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After losing your job, consult a lawyer to ensure your severance terms are fair and reasonable, given all the circumstances. Be sure you investigate your health and benefits coverage, and note important dates to get in your claims or convert to a private plan.
If your severance package didn't include outplacement services, consider hiring a career coach to jump-start your job search process or ask a mentor for assistance. An accountability partner can work with you to uncover your strengths, open up new possibilities for your career, keep you on track with your goals, and help you shift your mindset.
4. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job create a budget
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Concerning your financials, take a balanced approach. Don't go overboard with spending, trying to prove you’re going to be all right, and don't catastrophize about your financial situation. Give yourself a spending budget and get creative to make your dollars go farther.
Money coach Pegi Burdick advised to "Eliminate non-essential spending and move forward from there As you stop spending on nonessentials, check them off your list. Taking control of yourself and your spending reduces feelings of shame. And the bottom line is that the more control you take, the more confident you will feel."
5. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job make time for self-care
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Take this time to do things for yourself that you might not normally do. Read a book, indulge in a nap, or get a massage or acupuncture treatment. It’s essential to eat well to boost your ability to manage your stress.
"Savor every delicious, nutritious bite," explained wellness coach Lauryn Sires. "Feel great about yourself. As you become more empowered in your choices, you'll find yourself trying new recipes and even eating a variety of colorful, nutritious foods you previously didn't crave. Congratulations: you are now caring for yourself. "
6. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job have a daily routine in place
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Resist any urge to stay in bed all day. Get up at your regular time and create a routine for yourself. Block off time to relax, eat, and sleep on a consistent schedule, and go to the gym as usual. Make sure you also dedicate time each day to your career transition efforts, which might include reflecting on your strengths and ideal job and marketing yourself. Consistency is key.
Life coach Teresa Brenke questioned, "If most of your thoughts are automatically happening rather than consciously choosing them, then you want to make sure those thoughts line up with who you want to be and what you want to do. And if you are not getting the results you want in life, then it's time to look at your "autopilot mode" and align it with who you want to be."
7. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job reflect and focus
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Take the next few weeks to come up with a game plan instead of sending out 100 resumes. Putting in a quality application takes a lot of time and effort. Make sure you're applying to the right roles in the right organizations, or you'll get disappointing results.
Success often means digging deep, connecting to your inner wisdom, looking back at your life's lessons, and projecting forward. Focus on what you love, what's important to you, and what you can contribute, and then create a crystal-clear vision of your future work. When you do this, you will be in an excellent position to market yourself and your resume.
8. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job get perspective
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It may seem like forced time off to lose your job, but you can use this time to take a step back and look at your circumstances with fresh eyes. Get into nature, go near a body of water, or climb up a hill or mountain. A little height can give you a view from a new angle. Often, it helps to speak with someone objectively about your situation and realize it is not as bad as you think. You have something unique to offer an employer and the world.
9. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job find joy
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Use this time off to consciously look for happiness in simple pleasures. Reconnect with hobbies like gardening or sports, or reinvigorate your life with music — in fact, studies have proven singing lifts your spirits. The research explained how singing is often used as a means of "self-actualization and self-expression as a way to release emotional tensions." Most of all, be mindful of all the beauty around you. Inject joy into every day.
10. People who bounce back quickly after losing their job stay positive
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You have a lot to bring to a new job, and you’ll find that this period is just a blip in your overall career. If you’re having trouble believing this just now, write out some affirmations and keep saying them until you are confident they are true:
- I have amazing talents to offer an organization.
- I trust myself, and I trust in the universe.
- I am energized to find my next job.
- I believe in myself and my ability to do my ideal work.
Here’s the glimmer of hope in your job loss: you’re free! You’re available to reflect on what you want and take your career to new heights.
Being unemployed can feel very personal in the beginning. "Why me? Why now?" you ask. Companies decide to make structural or personnel changes for many reasons. And while it doesn't make it right or pleasant, the truth is the reason for your termination doesn't ultimately matter.
What counts is learning how to deal with unexpected life changes so you can mentally prepare for re-entering the job market. There's no harm in hoping for the best, either. It's easy to get stuck in pity and feel discouraged when your self-esteem has taken a hit, and your wallet is empty, but there is a reason for optimism.
There are lessons to be learned from this job loss experience, and by slowly building confidence, you will have better success moving on when you adopt a positive mindset. Don’t look back. A bright future is on the horizon.
Lisa Petsinis is an ICF-credentialed career and life coach who works with women who want to show up fully for their lives and build lasting life skills – like confidence and resilience – that will help them achieve their career and life goals.
