Self

Why It's Important To Share With Others When You're Struggling

Photo: Jakub Zak / Shutterstock
supportive friends

By Larissa Martin

I’m practically the queen of telling those around me to tell me when they’re struggling.

I like being able to provide my friends with support in whatever way I’m able at the time.

When it comes to myself and talking about when I am not OK, though, it’s different because I hate “burdening” people with my problems, and I don’t like having people worry about me.

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I used to think that my problems weren’t “big” enough to warrant talking about.

In recent years, though, I have learned why it is so important to speak up when you’re not OK or are struggling.

Recently, my world was shaken to its core.

Therefore, I have had to rely heavily on family and friends for emotional support — more than I’d like to. Since then, I’ve come to the realization that not being OK is completely normal.

It’s something that we all experience, and no one is immune to it.

Since we all have struggles in our lives and need to talk about them, there’s no such thing as being a burden. Therefore, we shouldn’t think that leaning on others is a “bad” thing in times when we need extra support.

I personally believe that we don’t talk about our problems when we’re not OK because we often tend to invalidate ourselves and our needs.

We may think that our struggles and emotions are insignificant when in reality, our difficult circumstances don’t take away from everyone else’s life experiences.

Every struggle matters, and it always will — no matter what happens to us.

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During the pandemic, we all needed to rely on each other because it impacted everyone. The pandemic taught us that it takes a village to heal — and there’s no shame in that now more than ever; we need our support systems to get through the challenges we face.

In order to face your challenges, the first step is to admit to yourself and your family or friends or even a therapist that you’re not OK.

You need to validate yourself and your feelings and talk about them.

Then, your healing can start because of your willingness to open up and get help from your “village.”

Talking about your emotions not only helps you, but it also helps others feel less alone, which can give them the opportunity to be vulnerable with you.

We have to realize that struggling sometimes is OK.

Once we have honest conversations about our emotions, we can start healing our trauma and making life easier for future generations.

I’m healing with the help of my support system, and if you open up about how you’re really feeling, you can too.

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Larissa Martin is a writer whose work has been featured on MSN, Yahoo Lifestyle, Thrive Global, Unwritten, YourTango, and The Mighty.

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This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.