Self

9 Easy Habits To Improve Your Health, Wealth, And Relationships

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Do you want to enjoy better intimacy, have more money, and drastically increase the length and quality of your life? Through the last twenty years of my life, I have been blessed with some incredible mentors who have coached me in the realms of health, wealth, and relationships.

With the help of the tips you’re about to read, I went from suicidal, isolated, anxiety-ridden, financially struggling, and unfulfilled... to energetic, happy, confident, financially thriving, and with a deep sense of community and social support beyond my wildest dreams.

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Seed habits are the things that you can do that have the greatest possible impact on the largest amount of your life. Integrating these good habits is like knocking over the first domino in a lineup of twenty dominos. Yes, you only did one thing, but that one simple act has a positive cascading effect on the rest of your life as an added bonus.

The following tips are simple to achieve good health, wealth, good habits, and healthy relationships. No new-age woo-woo talk is to be found here.

Without further ado, here are three seed habits, in the realms of health, wealth, and relationships, that will set you up to thrive even more than you already are.

Here are 9 easy habits to improve your health, wealth, and relationships:

1. Go to bed at the same time in a cool, quiet, dark room, ideally several hours before midnight

Sleep is a baseline necessity for everything else functioning well in your life. And if you don’t make it a priority, you will pay the price.

Do whatever it takes. Install blackout curtains over your windows. If it’s hot in your room, fall asleep with a hot water bottle filled with cold water. If you routinely fall asleep after midnight, see how your body responds to going to bed closer to 9 or 10 p.m.

2. Drink water upon waking up

The majority of the world is chronically dehydrated. If you pee yellow or dark yellow on a consistent basis, you need to be drinking more water.

For the sake of your energy levels, libido, mental clarity, and bodily functioning, aim to drink at least 2-3 liters of water every single day. The easiest way to do this? Buy a water bottle or two that you love, and fill them with water every evening. That way, when you wake up the next day, you’ll know exactly how much water you need to get through that day.

3. Eat a whole food-based diet, consuming the highest quality foods you can access and afford

People eat a lot of processed stuff. And it’s no wonder! The fake foods of the world are literally scientifically formulated to be as addictive and appealing as possible. But your body pays a price for eating all of this nutrient-deficient noise.

At least 80 percent of the time, eat actual foods. And eat the highest quality options you can find and afford. For example, there’s a huge difference (as far as your body is concerned) between consuming a high-quality, organic grass-fed steak, and a super-cheap multi-pack of nitrate-loaded breakfast sausages.

No one is perfect. There’s no need to get fanatical about this stuff. Sometimes you’re in an airport at 2 AM and the only place that is open is a fast food joint. But make good decisions, most of the time, and your body and mental clarity will thank you.

Runners up:

  • Exercise: Or, in other words, literally just move your body in a way that feels enjoyable to you. Lift weights. Go for a long walk. Go dancing with friends. If you like it, and it happens to make you sweat, go do that a few times per week.
  • Have friends: Being chronically socially isolated is terrible for your health. Humans are a social species and we thrive when we have a sense of community.

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4. Constantly add to your skills and make yourself more valuable to help the world

You’ve probably heard the old adage of "work smarter, not harder." Well, here’s an example of that in real-time.

I have a friend who wrote his first non-fiction book when he was 21 years old. He was so proud of how it had turned out. But when he published it on Amazon it only sold a handful of copies (that, by his estimation, his mom probably bought). He knew that the book was good, but he didn’t know how to get millions of people to read it.

The odds seemed stacked against him. He didn’t have a ton of start-up capital or a major publisher backing him, and putting his boon checkout stands everywhere. So what did he do? He decided to dedicate the next decade of his life to writing more books.

He thought to himself, “If I just keep adding as much value to this marketplace that I want to serve, eventually, it will have to come back to me, somehow.” And he was right! He has since written close to 100 books and routinely makes over $60,000 per month, just from his Amazon royalties.

So, regardless of what industry or career path you are in, there is a way to get better at it and become a more valuable asset to the people, industry, or market that you serve.

It isn’t about money. Or about time. It’s about value. Focus on what value you are creating for the world, and you will be rewarded abundantly.

5. Keep your larger fixed costs low

Too many books on money management focus on the trivial many versus the vital few. Who cares about whether you buy a $8 coffee every day? I say, enjoy the smaller things that bring you joy.

(Besides, you could literally drink an $8 store-bought coffee every single day and that would run you under $3,000 per year. And yet, people barely bat an eye when their friends purchase clothes or a watch or a car that they are paying 2-10x more than they need to simply because of the brand, AKA social status, associated with it.)

If you’re really looking to make a dent in your overall financial strategy, focus more on the big wins. Are you going to have kids, or not? If yes, how many? Are you renting or buying where you live? How much space do you really need? How do you get yourself around? Are you buying that car for functionality or to impress your more superficial or status-oriented friends?

We are all going to die. You are going to die. So, don’t sign up for self-imposed slavery just to impress people who have shallow values and low self-esteem.

6. Auto-pilot invests on a monthly basis

(Is the simplicity of these tips boring you yet? If yes, good. Are you doing something about them? That’s the real question.)

Everyone knows that saving money is important, but very few people actually do anything about it. Considering that money problems are one of the biggest sources of stress for people worldwide, and stress is linked to a full range of medical issues, this stuff matters.

If you’re worried about how you’re going to pay rent a year from now, or whether or not you’ll have enough money to retire before you’re 70, then it’s time to get serious about your financial health.

One of the highest-leverage financial hacks there is is to invest (even a tiny amount) on a monthly basis, in a way that is automatically set up. The automatic part matters. If you have to do it consciously and exert willpower every time you invest, then it isn’t nearly as likely to happen. Conversely, if it’s just happening on its own, you barely notice that the money has left your account at all.

Personally, I have been investing on a near-monthly basis for over a decade, and this has worked wonders for me.

I am a very set-it-and-forget-it person when it comes to my investing strategy. I know some people love day trading or obsessing over their stock portfolio, but for me, life is too short. I would rather get reasonable returns consistently and not have to think about it at all, versus pouring a lot of time and energy into actively managing my account just to get a 2 percent bump on my returns.

The place where I put the majority of my invested money is in a robo-advisor app called WealthSimple. I’ve been consistently getting 8-15 percent returns with them over the past several years, and am very impressed with their service. Their managing fees are way lower than the banks or most independent financial advisors, and they also have some cool perks.

For example, when you invest over $100,000 with them, they give you a free membership card that lets you access the first-class lounge in essentially every major airport in the world — totally free of charge.

Again, even auto-investing $100 a month will add up to a lot (with the compounded interest) over the course of a decade or two. Get started today. Because, as one of my earliest mentors Jim Rohn once said, “What’s easy to do is easy not to do.”

Runners up:

  • Create multiple sources of income: While the focus is important, and it’s generally better to double down on something that is going well versus spreading yourself too thin, there’s also something to be said about diversifying your risk. 
  • Invest in your relationships: In my worldview, money is a result of relationships. No one has ever become financially successful in total isolation. You either need other people supporting you in your business/career, or you are serving people with your gifts and they are paying you for it. So make sure that you are always pouring energy into your closest relationships. 

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7. Make your relationships a priority

Society rewards isolation. If you’re alone, then you feel a void. You then fill that void with shopping, binge eating, over-consuming, and overworking yourself. Making your relationships a priority is a rebellious act when the world is encouraging you to do otherwise.

So this step is about making a conscious choice. It is absolutely an option that you choose not to prioritize your relationships. I have met people who proudly aimed at forgoing all closeness in their relationships (single by choice for 30+ years, zero close friends, no one at their work really knew them) and they were some of the saddest people I have ever met.

If you want to make your relationships a priority, then choose it fully. And then back up that choice with your actions. Don’t be a "fair-weather" friend to your friends. Don’t only show up for your significant other when they’re in a good mood.

If you’re going all-in, then you have to be all-in for all of it. The good, the bad, the messy, the chaotic, the heart-breakingly beautiful, the pain, the loss, and the joy. The first step is to simply say yes to this way of living. Accept it fully, and all that it entails.

8. Establish and maintain a primary weekly relationship habit

This weekly habit will depend on you, your goals, your temperament, which relationships you are predominantly looking to impact, and your lifestyle. Here are some examples to get you started. You could:

  • Host a dinner party with friends and/or family.
  • Have a weekly clearing with your partner.
  • Schedule a weekly spoiling session with your partner (or one for each of you).
  • Run (or attend) a weekly men’s or women’s group.
  • Send a thank you letter/appreciation note to someone you care about.

Whatever it is, choose it, and maintain it.

They say the world belongs to those who show up. Well, this can be your way of showing up for those you care about most deeply. And the rewards that will come from it will only grow with time.

9. Speak your appreciation aloud

Whatever we give our appreciation to appreciates its value in our minds. Conversely, if we criticize, condemn, or curse something, it erodes the value of it. So not only should you be consciously cultivating gratitude for the people in your life, but you should also be speaking it aloud to the people directly so that they know how you feel about them.

Call your parents and tell them how they did well in raising you. Tell your partner what you love about them the most (the big things and the little things). Send a quick message to one of your best friends saying, “Hey, I miss you! Let’s catch up soon. PS. I really love ____ about you, and thought that you should know that. Hope you’re having a great day!”

Do this with no ulterior motive other than to feel good and to spread love into the world. Again, it’s allowed to be that simple.

Runners up:

  • Be ultra-kind to yourself: All relationships ultimately stem from your relationship with yourself. If you are constantly beating yourself down in your own mind, then it will feel foreign to accept the love or kindness of others. Instead, practice loving kindness towards yourself in your thoughts, words, and actions. In fact, you should aim to be unreasonably loving towards yourself by the majority of people’s standards. The majority of people are not fulfilled or content with themselves, so don’t listen to the opinions of the majority when it comes to matters of being kind unto yourself.
  • Go deep with few, not shallow with many: At a certain point of social contact, quality connections matter more than the quantity of connections. Make sure that you are going deep with the people who are in your life (be they friends, family members, or your significant other) and not just scattering your energy around and giving no one your true, deeply authentic self. This strategy not only serves those relationships that get the best of you, but it also serves you, your joy, and your mental health to feel deeply seen and known by a select number of people whom you cherish.

Remember: by simply putting a few of these seed habits into practice, your life can change for the better faster than you may think possible.

One burger won’t give you a heart attack. One salad won’t give you a six-pack. Saying "I appreciate you a lot" one time won’t cultivate durable, unbreakable depth in your friendship.

But cultivating small, simple, regular habits will transform your life with time.

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Jordan Gray is a five-time #1 Amazon best-selling author, public speaker, and relationship coach with more than a decade of practice behind him. His work has been featured in The New York Times, BBC, Forbes, The Huffington Post, and more.

This article was originally published at Jordan Gray Consulting. Reprinted with permission from the author.