Dating A Christian Man Who Is Unavailable Emotionally

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Christian Dating & The Emotionally Unavailable Man Of God
Self, Heartbreak

Falling in love can be a challenge. Not only do you have to find someone that you like, but you also have to figure out if they feel the same way about you and if they don’t, how to get them to.

How do you date a godly, Christian man who is emotionally unavailable?

However, since there are already strict rules in place about priests and nuns, let’s just look at pastors.

The perils of potential dating, in general, are already hard enough, but things can get even more complicated when you fall for someone that you probably shouldn’t have.

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While there are obvious choices such as a criminal while they’re still in jail or something similar, there’s also the possibility you fall for someone of the cloth, otherwise known as a godly man, a pastor, priest, nun, who may be so in love with God that they are emotionally unavailable for dating other Christians.

There’s no rule stating that Christian men who serve the church can’t be married, and in fact, out of all the churches I’ve been to, none of the Christian pastors were single either.

So they’re certainly allowed to fall in love. And falling for someone who’s faithful to God is bound to be someone that would make a good romantic partner, right?

While you’re certainly on the right track, there’s a bit of a difference between your average Christian man who loves the Lord and the pastor of a church. It seems like nowadays everyone has their own interpretation of what it means to be a godly, Christian man.

Some approach it loosely while others seem like they practically built the church themselves. But there is (or should be) a steady stream within pastors or other men dedicated to Christian service universally, and it’s also the brutal truth for you.

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The Brutal Truth: Because the pastor or any man of God has committed himself not only to God but to his flock as well, he has little time for romance. Therefore, it will be near impossible to get him to notice you romantically.

Remember how I said all the pastors or godly me I’ve met are married? Well, pretty much all of them found a wife and got married early. Like, really early, before they were even pastors.

So basically, unless you’ve known this preacher before he got up on stage for years and years and just never said anything about your feelings, good luck.

A man of god's priority is his faith and following his call. He is not looking for love because he believes God will provide him his perfect mate.

To look for love may lead him to an unequally yoked marriage. Instead, a godly, Christian man who is single uses his time to develop his faith and to convey God’s messages to the people that choose to listen to him.

While it’s true everyone has downtime and outside of the church he may be free, he’s still making sure that there is a God in everything he does.

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That’s part of what it means to be faithful. It’s not that he has no interest in romance, it’s just that it’s not at the top of his list.

You can try romancing him all you want, but there’s no guarantee it will even make a dent. His focus is on God and living his life faithfully, along with showing others how to do that as well.

If you can get him to see you in a more love-filtered light, then good for you. But if it seems like you can’t make any progress whatsoever, don’t get discouraged. Just know it’s really not you, it’s him and there’s not much you can do about it.

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Jesse Oakley is a writer who writes about love, relationships, self-care and spirituality/astrology.