22 Cheesy Pick Up Lines To Try (That He'll Actually Fall For)

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cheesy pick up lines

"I like my coffee like I like my men: right in front of me, right now."

In the same way that the real point of online dating is to actually meet in the real world, the point of pick up lines is to meet in real life under the pretense that you’re a safe, fun person who may or may not be worth sharing a drink, a bed, a whole meal of food, or a life together. Some high stakes for sure but fortune favors the bold.

And in a post-every-single-famous-man-being-fired-for-sexual-harassment-or-worse world, we may need women to lead the way in flirting and romantic conversations. At least until we can collectively get ourselves together.

RELATED: 26 Pick Up Lines Even Introverts Can Use To Get Lucky

From one-nighters to all-lifers and everything in between, here are 22 cheesy pick up lines that just may actually work on a guy. (If you may feel the desire to add the word “AYYYYYYY” after any of these pick up lines, go with that instinct and understand that the presence of parentheses indicates something is an action you need to do.)

1. "How much you think a polar bear weighs? Enough to break the ice."

It’s a classic and it’s a classic for a reason. 

2. "I'm glad I used to work for UPS because you look like you've got a big package."

Okay, you’re veering into vulgar but men do like compliments. Specifically about that part. 

3. "What’s the difference between a Ferrari and a boner? I hope I’m not giving you a Ferrari right now."

You’re officially in the raunch-zone. Good luck! 

4. "People say that having a Hotmail address might date you, but you’re the kind of hot male I’d want to date."

If there’s anything I know about men at bars, it’s that they love word play. 

5. "The bartender said these drinks are for this 'hot guy over there.' I assume he meant you."

Come on, this one is a gimme! Free drink and a great compliment? You have his attention. 

6. "I think I lost my phone, can I call it with yours? (It’s in your pocket or hand).

Now that you have my number, you can buy me a drink."

This one may be too complicated. I’m sorry. 

7. "Are you from Tennessee? I only ask because you’re an 11."

It’s a twist on this old classic. 

8. "Wow are your eyes blue? I can see myself in them. I wish your pants were that blue."

Again, if you’re thirsty, let him know. 

9. "You: Smells like updude in here. 

Him: What’s updude? 

You: Not much, what’s up with you, dude?"

Sophomoric? Yup. Shows you have a sense of humor? Also yup. 

10. "I didn’t think this place had wi-fi, but I’m getting a pretty strong connection right here."

Do you think he may be a Big Bang Theory fan? If not, there's no chance of this working at all. 

RELATED: These 20 Pick Up Lines Will Make You Roll Your Eyes (But SMILE)

11. "I like my coffee like I like my men: right in front of me, right now."

Or bitter and fair trade. Whatever floats your boat. 

12. "Were I to rearrange the alphabet, I’d put 'I' on top of 'U.'"

Yet another VERY aggressive twist on an old classic. 

13. "You should feel my skirt. It’s made of one-night stand material."

Oh boy. 

14. (Bump into him.) "We should probably exchange numbers in case the damage is worse than it looks."

If he doesn’t have car insurance, this one may not work. 

15. "You seem like someone who could help me with my Vitamin D deficiency."

Look, do you want to be incredibly forward or not?

16. "I like your shirt. It would look better on my floor."

This is approaching parody, I know.  

17. "Do you like pizza? You want a pizza this (Point to yourself)?"

This one certainly is going to require a Fonzie-esque “ayyyyyyyyyy” to top it off.

18. "What’s got one thumb and is too shy to talk to you?"

It’s funny because if you have two thumbs you also have one thumb. It’s somewhat sad if you only have one thumb. 

19. "You may not need a new job, but if you work hard enough there may be a position open just underneath me."

We’re approaching dad joke territory here but the purpose is to let down our guard and remember that only around 75 percent of total strangers are trying to hurt you in some way. 

20. "My friend told me you were an expired parking meter and I believe her 'cause you fine."


21. "Are you single? I’m asking for a friend. (Point to yourself.)"

Direct is... good? 

22. "You: Do you think a horse eats sandwiches or hay? 

Them: Hay? 

You: Hey to you too!"

I’ll expect an invite to your wedding. 

With any luck, you’ll either break the ice with a very cool new guy, or at least not be the wrong side of a sexual harassment lawsuit.

RELATED: 10 Pick-Up Lines SO Truly, Truly Awful They’re Almost Great

Tom Miller is a writer and performer based in New York. He's been a mechanical engineer and a banker. He's been the general manager and coordinating video producer at YourTango for 11 years. He's probably listening to Bryan Adams' "(Everything I Do) I Do It For You" as we speak.