Because Dear Ol' Abby Just Won't Do


What to do when you find yourself in love with a man who's not on board? Ask Julie.

by Julie Robinson

  Dear Rhonda— I want to start this letter off by stating that I really appreciate your situation. You are in a very difficult place and whatever you decide to do is going to lead to a certain amount of initial suffering. Change does that, and quite frankly, you are due for some pretty serious change based on what you told me.

Here is the gist of what I got from your letter—you have given up everything humanly possible to be with a man who loves you but is not in love with you. When you connected initially he was turned on by the chase/chemistry/sexually charged atmosphere and now that he has you there on his turf to care for him you are both comfortable—to a degree—but not as committed as you would like to be. At some point you would like to marry this man and have his children even though he has told you that that will never happen. You feel the tug of society (and that damn biological clock) and want to either make a clean break from this man or somehow get him to change his mind. You are “blissfully happy” while also clearly going a wee bit insane wondering what can be done to get you and him to where YOU think you want to be.

Here are a couple of tough questions I’d like you to consider when making your decision about what to change in your life and what to keep the same: Read more . . .