alone on a beautiful day


its a beautiful spring day..warm without a cloud in the sky.
but i cant go out.
i can feel the breeze from the window in my bed, my coffin, where i lie in pain and tears as i die a little inside as each second passes.
i can see the sun streaming thru the venetian blinds. but i cant stand to look at it. regardless it cant break my mood.
i can imagine all the people out enjoying the day with their loved ones, families, kids, pets, lovers all of which i have none.  out at the park and beaches, strolling down busy urban streets, sharing ice creams and laughs.
sure i could leave my cave, brave the day alone. but all the while i would be thinking of him. wishing he were there by my side. he is the only one i would want to be with. the one who stole my heart away. 
broken, alone and afraid- afraid this is my fate.