9 Thoughts Highly Respected Women Always Keep To Themselves

We live in a tell-all society that rewards the spilling of secrets, but there are some things savvy women never share. Here, we share 10 thoughts best kept under wraps, especially by highly respected women. Trust us — your reputation and relationships will thank us later.

Here are 9 thoughts highly respected women always keep to themselves:

1. Their body angst

highly respected woman keeping their body angst to themselves Darlene Alderson / Pexels

Show me a woman who loves every single lump, bump, curve, and scar on her body, and I’ll show you an admirable outlier. The sad truth is that I've personally never met a woman who didn’t want to change something, models included.

The difference is that savvy women don’t go around calling attention to their perceived imperfections. They know that mentioning their flaws as a way to protect themselves from judgments only invites them. Instead, they highlight the attributes they like, throw out a little sass, and rock what their mama gave them.

2. The daily ups and downs of your relationship

highly respected woman keeping daily ups and downs to themselves cottonbro studio / Pexels

Monday, you’re happy, Tuesday you’re “done”, Wednesday, “it’s complicated,” but Thursday’s kiss-and-makeup session proved positive, and now it's Friday, you’re back in love. This is great news for you and your beau, but your bestie — who you shared every single detail with from good to bad back to good again — may not be over it just yet, which may rub her the wrong way on Saturday when you all meet up for drinks.

While sharing the ins and outs of life is a part of the foundation on which friendships are built, going into every detail of every disagreement may erode your brand as a couple. Do you really want to be labeled the girl who cried breakup?

3. That time you 'went a little crazy' over a break-up

highly respected woman keeping time they went crazy over a break-up to themselves Polina Zimmerman / Pexels

OK, so your ex was really, truly terrible, and you texted him a million times to limited (or no) response post-breakup. Or that time you almost moved to Australia for a man who didn't tell his family you existed. Not a great situation, but it happened, you learned from it (hopefully), and now you've moved on. But sharing this kind of behavior with potential mates will never, ever work to your benefit.

4. Any and all cyber-stalking

highly respected woman keeping all cyberstalking to themselves Anna Shvets / Pexels

So you and your friends have looked at your new boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's Instagram page and come to your conclusions. It’s not the best route to take, but let's be honest, most of us take a peek now and then. Just keep those conclusions to yourself — the most highly respected women do.

5. That you could do something better

highly respected woman keeping belief that they could do better to themselves Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels

Whether throwing a dinner or planning a party, there’s something gracious about allowing someone to do their best without pointing out how you can run circles around them, even if by way of “just trying to help.” Nobody likes a one-upper, and the most highly respected women don't try to outdo well-intentioned people who are just trying their best. If their best isn't your personal best, well, that's better left unsaid.

6. That you still think about your ex

highly respected woman keeping that they're still thinking about their ex to themselves Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels

It doesn’t matter how close you two are, and the fact that you “can tell him anything” doesn’t mean you should. If you’re still feeling confused or sad about a breakup, talk to a trusted friend or therapist and keep your new relationship past-free.

7. How much money you make/spend

highly respected woman keeping how much money they make or spend to themselves Karola G / Pexels

Money is a tricky topic, and it can bring up a mixture of feelings ranging from anxiety and insecurity to jealousy and judgment. You work hard; you can spend it as you see fit. Just have some decorum in the way you speak about your dinero — and especially other people's. Highly respected women know it's a bit tasteless to flaunt or probe into delicate financial issues, especially with someone you've just met.

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8. Your opinions on someone's family or your best friend's guy

highly respected woman keeping their opinions of his family to themselves mapo / iStock

Unless someone is truly disrespectful or dangerous, there's no need to share your personality conflicts with someone of importance to your guy or girlfriend. Not only will it make them feel bad, or worse, “in the middle” of something, but it may wind up causing a rift in your relationship. Not every person we meet will be our shot of vodka, and being an adult means knowing and honoring that while being polite and respecting your loved ones' right to choose who to love.

9. The secrets of others

highly respected woman keeping others' secrets to themselves Philip Justin Mamelic / Pexels

This isn’t grade school, and betraying trust is a sign you cannot and should not be trusted. If you can't keep someone's secrets, even the small ones, or you're prone to gossip, don't be surprised when people stop telling you things or remove you from their inner circle. The most highly respected women lead with loyalty first, and that starts with keeping private things private.

Brenda Della Casa is a self-development expert, writer, author, and speaker. Her articles and advice have been featured in Allure, Glamour, Men's Health, Huff Post, Cosmopolitan, and others.