4 Sweet And Purely Emotional Skills That Men Find More Attractive Than Any Physical Trait, According To Experts

Love needs more than physical attraction in order to grow.

Last updated on Jun 15, 2025

Woman has sweet emotional skills that men find attractive. Tim Samuel | Canva
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The emotionally mature adult knows beauty is only skin deep. They understand that the pull of attraction comes from having developed the relational skills necessary to spend a life of love together. 

A 2023 study indicated that strong relationships, built on relational skills, contribute to overall well-being, including physical and mental health. When you have relational skills combined with emotional maturity, you are sure to be a supercharged magnet of attraction.

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Here are four sweet and purely emotional skills that men find more attractive than any physical trait, according to experts:

1. Being able to cultivate empathy

When two people lock eyes across a room, they see hair color, height, hips, and the breadth of a shoulder, but three to six months later the intensity of color pales and the appeal of form diminishes and you are both looking for something that resonates and leaves a sweet taste, something that says, "they get me."

More attractive than any physical trait is empathy, and if it isn't a language you speak naturally, it is a skill you can learn. For those of us who want to make a partner's life happier, this attractive skill is one you practice in small and great ways. When you say, "Feeling as you do, it makes sense that you want me to. Your empathy for your partner allows you to negotiate with them, and the relationship in mind.

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Reta Walker, Ph.D. Relationship Coach

RELATED: How To Take Advantage Of What Men Find Most Attractive, According To Psychology

2. Ability to resolve conflict

woman with the emotional skill to resolve conflcit simona pilolla 2 / Shutterstock

The ability to disagree about the problem and be willing to find a solution or compromise. People understand the power of conflict resolution and low drama. 

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This doesn't mean that you go along with something you don't agree with to keep the peace. Rather, it means clear communication and the maturity to find ways to work together. When you can provide peace for a person, you automatically become more desirable because humans exert more energy to avoid pain than to seek pleasure.

—​ Ed Latimore, Life Coach

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3. Not conforming

Both men and women are more attracted to the profiles of people who know their minds. In a world that sometimes feels like it presses too hard for conformity, it feels more than a little bit excellent to know that an independent mind is where it’s at to send sparks flying. Women with their minds are the ones who get their attention — and the first date.

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—​ Karen Young, psychologist

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4. Ability to communicate effectively

woman with the purely emotional skill of linguistic ability Andrii Iemelianenko / Shutterstock

Being a great communicator who knows the language and proper tone to be commanding and direct, gentle and kind, challenging or encouraging, as well as how to articulate feelings, is intensely attractive.

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— Leah Grant, Spiritual Guide

When we spend time working on ourselves to build better relationship skills, we acknowledge and become active in doing the self-work required for a human being to reach their full potential.

Good relational skills create a better life for you and those you love. Also, knowing how to lead with empathy, resolve conflict, and be true to yourself are powerful and attractive to anyone who has developed the same skills in themselves.

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RELATED: 5 Rare Qualities That Make A Woman Feel Like Home To Men, According To Psychology

Will Curtis is YourTango's expert editor. Will has over 14 years of experience as an editor covering relationships, spirituality, and human interest topics.

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