If You're Sensitive And Always Tired, These 5 Simple Things Really Help
Photo Book Pro | Shutterstock Are you really intuitive about your friends and family? When there's a conflict brewing, can you sense it? Do you pick up on the emotions of other people easily, maybe even those you just met? If you answered yes to any of those questions, then you might have an empathetic personality type.
Being a highly sensitive person means you are a person with empathy. But it goes even further than that. Empaths feel all of the feelings — their entire life is affected by the feelings of the people around them. It's a wonderful gift! You can connect with strangers easily, and when it comes to managing groups of people or solving conflicts, nobody does it better than an emotionally attuned person.
But when you live your entire life being drowned in the unconscious feelings of other people, it gets incredibly exhausting. The highly sensitive person is often so busy taking care of other people or worrying about them, they forget to take care of themselves.
If you're sensitive and always tired, these 5 simple things really help:
1. Set clearer boundaries in your relationships
When you start dating someone, everything feels wonderful. This goes double for highly sensitive people. All of those wonderful butterflies in an emotionally attuned person's stomach are multiplied because they are also feeling the butterflies in their partner's stomach. It's a rare treat and one to be savored. However, that deep connection created by the empath at the beginning of the relationship can become draining over time.
Even when your relationship is going really well, feeling your partner's feelings 24/7 is more than anyone should ever be expected to handle. You might want to be with your partner all the time, but to keep your relationship on a firm footing and your own emotional health intact, make sure to take at least one day a week all for yourself.
The Gottman Institute explained, "Boundaries are a recognition that we can’t control what others say or do, but we can control how we respond and what we allow into our environment. That’s what boundaries are all about. Although boundaries create separation in the short term, they are actually necessary and healthy in all relationships."
2. Stop changing yourself to make others comfortable
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To be the friend of an emotionally attuned person is an absolute honor. It means you have someone in your life who knows what you're thinking and feeling and can sometimes articulate it better than even you can. Ask your friends, they will surely agree, they're lucky to have you.
Some people won't value your gift. These are the people who will accuse you of being "too sensitive" or of being "overly dramatic." Because of who you are, you might feel tempted to put a bushel over your bright light just to make others feel more comfortable. Don't do it! They aren't hiding who they are to make you more comfortable; why should you do the same?
Spiritual coach Pernilla Lillarose elaborated, "Imagine your sixth sense as your mother tongue and a language others have not learned. It’s confusing to be born into a world where people speak a different language than you do (the five senses). That’s why so many highly sensitive beings have unlearned their native tongue to try to fit in. And it doesn’t feel good, nor does it work."
3. Walk away from relationships that drain you
As a highly sensitive person, your relationships with the people around you are integral to who you are as a person. You thrive on engaging in deep, meaningful exchanges of emotion. When a friend or a partner is in crisis, you shine, acting as an advisor and a shoulder to cry on.
But people who are constantly in crisis can drain you dry and take advantage of your gift. You will always feel compelled to help even the most troubled person you meet, but take your own advice, and when a relationship turns toxic, know you can end it, and no one will fault you for it.
"When you are conscious and aware of the energy dynamic between yourself and others, you realize energetic give and take goes on all the time," pointed out energy healer Sarah Lawrence. "The real growth comes when you can learn to sense what is going on in the present moment and then decide what you want to do about it. We can all be givers and takers sometimes."
4. Pay attention to what actually drains you
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Everyday exchanges can be revitalizing for empaths, or they can be draining. Keep a journal and record how the activities in your daily life make you feel.
Being someone who is emotionally attuned doesn't mean meditating and doing yoga are the only things that will energize you. Maybe baking a dozen cookies or spending time with friends is even more effective at bolstering your energy reserves.
For everything that makes you feel revitalized, there will be things that drain you. A long crowded commute on mass transit, grocery shopping at peak hours, getting cornered by the old woman who lives in your building, these could all be things that drain you. Being able to identify them will help you prepare for them and balance these encounters out with activities that make you feel energized.
5. Make time for yourself non-negotiable
An emotionally attuned person's life is about connecting with other people. Being social is a critical part of who you are. That's why you will need to work hard to prioritize time for yourself. Feed yourself, nurture yourself, and make sure to get plenty of "you" time. It might not come naturally to you, but you'll find life a lot easier to handle if you learn how to take care of yourself as well as you take care of the people in your life.
Perhaps the most important piece of advice I can give a highly sensitive person is this:
Keep on feeling everything you feel, and don't let anybody tell you it's wrong or weird.
Take the steps you need to take to make sure you're as happy, comfortable, and engaged as you would have all the people in your life be.
Rebecca Jane Stokes is a writer and the former Senior Editor of Pop Culture at Newsweek with a passion for lifestyle, geek news, and true crime.
