3 Personality Traits The Most Irresistible Women All Have In Common

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So many of our insecurities can come from how we look on the outside. We believe that to attract, capture, and keep a rich, successful, smart, kind, funny, and/or handsome man; we must look like supermodels.

Women tend to scrutinize our own looks (and each other’s) more than men. For instance, I like my eyes but wish I had a smaller waist. For men, once you pass a threshold whereby they find you physically attractive, that is all that matters.

The rest is chemistry and compatibility.

Quality men don’t consider whether you are a 7, 8, 8.5, 9, or 10. If he finds you attractive — that is it. The rest is up to the intangibles, a combination of personality, background, life goals, and attitude. There is 1 intangible that will separate you from the herd and make any man find you irresistible — attitude.  

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Here are the three personality traits the most irresistible women have in common: 

1. They take ownership of their life and emotional disposition

Women wield a lot more power over men than many realize. Men are very sensitive to a women’s emotional disposition. They may not say anything or be able to articulate why they find one girl attractive versus not…but a man feels what you feel.

So if you are uptight, pessimistic, or fearful, he will feel that and react either by trying to make you feel better or, more often, by running away because he doesn’t like feeling that way.

Has a guy ever told you another girl was “cool”?  This “cool” girl may not seem like the most physically attractive girl to you, but somehow every guy she meets finds her attractive. That is because guys are drawn to her emotional disposition.

So, what does this mean for you? Your outlook on life, emotional state, and views on men matter. Leave all the previous failed relationships and bad dates at home when you go out on a date. Embrace life and the opportunities it gives you now. 

Taking ownership of your disposition means he can open up and trust you to be the safe harbor for his emotions. He perceives you to have your act together and that you are on his side. This is incredibly important for men because they don’t often get to reveal their true selves to people.

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2. They know how to have fun and let loose

Most highly eligible men have stressful jobs, and a lot is demanded from them. After all, they didn’t become successful and highly sought-after by being lazy. Thus, they want to unwind, relax, and have fun in their downtime.

It takes effort even for the most charismatic, outgoing man to be entertaining, let alone the more introverted man. The world demands him to be a certain way to bestow the kind of respect highly eligible men wants. Every day is a competition with other men for respect and status.  

When dating a woman, he is also working hard to think of ways to entertain you so that you find him attractive and worthy of you. It is exhausting

Imagine these two different experiences from his perspective:

A) You have to work hard to figure out how to make this girl laugh and enjoy herself.

Maybe it is going to a fancy Italian restaurant, maybe it is to a jazz bar, maybe it is a walk in the park, or maybe it is going camping. Maybe she will laugh if you say this…Maybe she will think you are cool if you tell her you did X-Y-Z.

If she doesn’t laugh or seem to enjoy herself at your first attempt to do something, you have to try something else. Whew….a lot of work! It may be ok for a little bit to get the girl but to have to do that for a lifetime…

B) A girl tells you what she likes to do. You make plans for the two of you to do it.

She is having a lot of fun and engaging with you. It doesn’t matter what the two of you are doing; she seems to be having fun and relaxed. Being with her feels easy. You begin to relax and have fun.

A man wants to be successful in making you happy. Life is better with you that way. You offer him an escape from the demands of everyday life.

RELATED: How To Make A Man Feel Seen & Fully Appreciated

3) A man can easily win with them

Men are wired to be hunters and providers. This means that he is wired to want to win because it makes him feel successful.  

I will break it out into 2 things: Action and reward. Action can be any act done that includes physical, spoken, or unspoken.

Physical acts include opening the door and making a restaurant reservation. Spoken acts can be saying you look gorgeous or giving you quality advice. Unspoken acts include remembering your birthday or giving you space to go out with your girlfriends.

The reward he is looking for is an acknowledgment of success. It can be anything from a smile to a verbal thank you to a hug and kiss.

The deeper reason this means so much to him?  He feels like a man — successful, a hero, a knight that won the princess, a provider. Men are often not given a lot of emotional validation by society, but he deserves some, too, right?

Mastering these 3 irresistible attitudes takes practice. Start slowly and see how men react to you. You will know you have mastered the three attitudes when you notice how many men are proactively being helpful to you. Rome wasn’t built in a day, so start slowly and form a support group to encourage you.

Your perfect husband is around the corner. You can do it!  

RELATED: 8 Ways To Become Irresistible To The *Right* Kind Of Guy

Jasmine Von Hatch is a dating and relationship coach specializing in communication problems, empowering women, online dating, relationships, and more.