People Who Talk To Themselves Instead Of Just Thinking Silently Usually Have These 11 Reasons

When we see someone talking to themselves in public, it’s easy to pass quick judgments. People may be embarrassed to be caught talking to themselves, but it’s completely normal. In fact, there are many positive side effects to speaking out loud rather than just thinking quietly. It can help with memory and retention, and might even help you understand your thoughts better. Think about it, if we can’t talk honestly to ourselves, who can we talk to?

“The relationship that you have with yourself is the longest one that you’ll have. Perhaps for you, just like in other relationships, that means chatting and checking in from time to time,” says Columbia University’s Go Ask Alice column. “The good news is that self-talk is considered to be a common phenomenon that most people engage in during their lives.” Whether you are talking to yourself to boost your morale or saying your thoughts out loud to further solidify them, several positive side effects come from talking to yourself. Those who find comfort in the task will rave all about it.

People who talk to themselves instead of just thinking silently usually have these 11 reasons

1. Enhanced focus

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As a writer, I do a lot of internal thinking. What I type is rarely said out loud during my initial writing process. However, reading what I have written down out loud helps my focus and allows me to clearly edit what I’ve said. I’ll never submit an article without reading it to myself first.

Self-talk can help enhance focus for anyone. Let’s say you’re feeling a bit all over the place. You have a million tasks to complete. Sometimes, it feels good to talk yourself through each one. It can help you focus better, and it makes a to-do list easier to accomplish. Speaking out loud works well for some people.

2. Better problem-solving skills

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When something is going wrong, whether it’s at work or in your personal life, your thoughts can become jumbled. It’s hard to see things from a rational perspective when your brain is moving at a mile a minute. Some have found that saying their thoughts out loud instead of keeping them held in allows them better problem-solving techniques.

Studies going back as far as the 1960s have found a connection between speaking out loud and enhanced problem-solving abilities. They found that verbalizing thoughts allowed people to slow down and better understand their feelings. In turn, they were able to calmly react to the situation and solve the issue at hand.

3. Memory and information retention

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I don’t know about you, but when I say something out loud, it solidifies it in my mind. I remember it better and retain the information deeper than I would have if I just thought about or read it. If you can relate, just know science is on your side.

Researchers in one study surveyed groups who had just read something. One group read silently, while the others verbalized it. They were then tasked with answering memory-based questions. Those who read out loud scored higher on the quiz. The next time you feel embarrassed talking to yourself, know you will remember and retain it better than your silent-thinking counterparts.

4. Higher confidence

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We’ve all heard about the benefits of positive self-talk. While it might sound a bit cheesy, it has been proven to work. Saying kind things to yourself can boost your confidence. It may be embarrassing to talk yourself up in the mirror, but it can greatly improve your confidence.

“Positive self-talk can help you improve your outlook on life. It can also have lasting positive health benefits, including improved well-being and a better quality of life,” says health writer Kimberly Holland. “If you tend to have negative self-talk and err on the side of pessimism, you can change it. It takes time and practice, but you can develop uplifting positive self-talk.”

5. Increased accuracy

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With enhanced memory from reading out loud to yourself comes the ability to have a more accurate conversation with others. If you need to memorize something, speaking it, rather than reading it internally, can help you retain it and give a more accurate retelling to someone else. This is especially relevant for people who are auditory learners.

You see actors practicing their lines out loud often. By doing so, they withhold the information, allow themselves to practice, and as a result, give a more accurate performance. There is value to saying things out loud, and the result is increased accuracy when retelling information.

6. Emotional regulation

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To be a bit vulnerable here, I have found that literally talking myself down when I am feeling upset helps immensely. Verbalizing your thoughts allows you to better regulate your emotions. You think clearly when you get out of your head and put your feelings into words.

A study conducted by the University of Michigan found that speaking to yourself in the third person helps with emotional regulation. “Essentially, we think referring to yourself in the third person leads people to think about themselves more, similar to how they think about others, and you can see evidence for this in the brain,” said Jason Moser, MSU associate professor of psychology. “That helps people gain a tiny bit of psychological distance from their experiences, which can often be useful for regulating emotions.”

7. Stress relief

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Sometimes, the only person you can talk to is yourself. If you’ve had a tough day and need to process it, talking out loud can provide stress relief. People who talk to themselves have found that they feel less stressed when they verbalize their thoughts rather than when they keep them silent.

“Self-talk can help you manage your emotions, reducing stress and anxiety while promoting a positive outlook in challenging situations," says Traci Pedersen of PsychCentral. When speaking out loud, studies have found that you perform better in academics and sports because it serves as a useful form of stress relief. While sharing your feelings with others is important, sometimes it’s easier to just say them out loud even if no one else is around. Next time you need to vent but no one is around, try hashing it out loud with yourself.

8. Social preparedness

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I am guilty of this one, and I swear by it! I have social anxiety, and going into new situations can bring me a lot of dread. One way I help myself before meeting someone new or having to speak in front of a group of people I don’t know is by practicing what I’m going to say ahead of time. Trust me, it looks and feels silly in the moment, but I always end up feeling more prepared leading up to the situation.

Science backs up the benefits of social rehearsal. One study found that those who practiced a speech before giving it had a better delivery. They paused less and spoke with ease. Next time you consider running a whole conversation through your head that hasn’t happened yet, go for it. You never know when you’ll need that confidence!

9. It’s a calming habit

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Sometimes, the reason someone speaks out loud to themselves instead of just thinking silently is simple. It calms them. Reassuring themselves makes them feel better about the situations around them. There is comfort in hearing your own voice. Telling yourself you are going to be okay or thinking through a situation out loud can become a positive habit.

For others, talking to themselves might just be a habit they acquired over time. They may not notice what they're doing, or that it is something that subconsciously calms them. Over time, it might have just become part of their life. Making a habit out of something that brings a sense of calm is never a bad thing.

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10. Self-reflection

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For some, reflecting comes best to them on paper. Getting their thoughts out in a journal can help them clear their head. What about people who struggle to write? Neuroscientist Dr. Don Vaughn says speaking out loud can be an equally powerful way to self-reflect.

“Consider the act a sort of ‘spoken journal to yourself,’’ says Dr. Vaughn. He adds that verbalizing our feelings can help us better sort through them. At the end of the day, it’s good to sit down with your thoughts, say them out loud, and reflect on the day. A spoken journal can help manage stress and improve self-esteem. Self-reflection looks different for everyone. Next time you feel like you need to check in with yourself, try doing it verbally and see if it impacts your self-reflection. Some people swear by this process.

11. Loneliness

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If you live alone and work from home, you may go hours without having a conversation with someone else. It might feel weird to start talking to yourself when you’re feeling lonely at first, but people who choose to speak out loud instead of just silently thinking to themselves find comfort in their own company.

A thread on Reddit gave commenters a chance to talk about their self-talk habits that arose out of loneliness. “It can go on and on. I do it in the mirror,” someone wrote. “I don't directly talk to myself but rather imagine someone listening.” Another said, “I talk to myself too. Like having a normal conversation, but just to myself. I’ve always wondered whether it was a mental issue or just a ‘quirk.’ Feel so dumb, I’ve only just realized it’s likely a habit born out of loneliness, out of a lack of people to converse with.”

Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.