People Who Desperately Want To Change Their Entire Lives But Probably Never Will Usually Have 11 Reasons For Both

Have you ever found yourself wanting to make a big change in your life? I know I’ve been there. It sounds good on paper, but there are several reasons why most of us fail to implement these changes.

There is a lot of fear in the unknown. This goes both ways when we want to change our lives desperately, but probably never will. What if we don’t succeed, or the changes we made weren’t worth it in the end? Or, what if it feels too good to be true? Asking these questions can make someone change their mind. Some people may picture their life differently, but never do anything to achieve those goals. It’s a layered issue that can get complicated.

People who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have 11 reasons for both

1. They fear the unknown

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both fear of the unknown Daniil_Kondrashin from pixabay via Canva

The unknown is scary. If someone desperately wants to change their lives but probably never will, they are likely afraid of the uncertainty. There is a lack of control in trying something new. Even if it is something they want badly, they may stand in their own way because of fear. It’s not easy to try something new.

What you don’t know can’t hurt you. This means that by not trying to change their lives, they’re avoiding what could cause them pain. They may be afraid it won’t work out, but they also worry they’ll live in regret. Why didn’t they make that change long ago? Then they could have been better off. Whether the result is success or failure, they are likely afraid of the unknown.

2. They can’t escape their comfort zone

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they cant escape their comfort zone Finn Hafemann from Getty Images via Canva

There is comfort in what we know. Even if we are unhappy with our daily routine, it’s what we are used to. Day in and day out, each activity is something we can count on. It may be boring and mundane; however, it is consistent. Some people struggle to break free from this routine.

We need to embrace change to get out of our comfort zones. Someone who desperately wants to change their life may be interested in the idea, but fails to move forward because they are afraid of what may come.

3. They are stubborn

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they are stubborn Jacob Lund via Canva

I’ll be honest, I can be stubborn. Sometimes, I can become stuck in my ways. While I may want to change, it’s easier said than done. Once I’m in a routine, it’s hard for me to break it. Stepping outside of that comfort zone isn’t easy.

Rigidity can keep someone from changing their lives. If they view their life a certain way, it can be hard for them to break from those chains. Stubborn people may never make these changes because they are stuck in their own ways. Even if they want to, they may not be able to imagine their lives any other way.

4. They lack a strategy

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they lack a strategy Ilya Komov from Pexels via Canva

To change your life dramatically, you need to have a solid strategy to achieve it. Some people may be able to visualize their lives differently, but putting together a plan to change them is a different story. Having the aspiration to change their life isn’t enough. It may be why they never will. They want to bring forward change, but putting in the work may be too overwhelming.

You need to be ready for the change. Some people may never reach that point. Even if they desperately want it, the need for strategy holds them back. It can be frustrating, and it may prevent them from achieving what they want.

5. They fear failure

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they fear failure Aidan Roof from Pexels via Canva

When someone is afraid of failure, it can prevent them from making changes. Although they may desperately want to change their lives, they are afraid of what may come of it. Even if they are not happy in their current situation, it’s a safe bet. They are secure in staying the same, while change is unsettling. Being unhappy may be better than falling short.

“Atychiphobia is an extreme fear of failure. Someone with this condition may procrastinate or avoid any situations where they don’t feel they’ll be completely successful. They may set unrealistic goals for themselves, which only increases the possibility of failure,” says the Cleveland Clinic.

6. They also fear success

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they also fear success LML 6768 from Pexels via Canva

While most people are familiar with a fear of failure, the fear of success may sound strange. This is the anxiety that comes with achievements. What comes next? Is this all there is to life? Once a goal is achieved, motivation may fade. Instead, someone may grow stagnant. They may find themselves asking, ‘Now what?’

For some, this sounds like a good problem to have. However, some may be overwhelmed by this reality. What if making that change wasn’t all it was cracked up to be? Do they even deserve their accomplishments? The fear of success can be just as scary as the fear of failure.

7. They make excuses

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they make excuses Pexels from pixabay via Canva

Making excuses is an easy way to avoid making a change. Even if it is something we want desperately, finding reasons not to do it will always be easier. We may find ourselves forming any conclusion we can to stay stagnant. We all make excuses. Whether it’s to keep ourselves from changing our lives or something as simple as avoiding working out to lounge on the couch instead. It’s part of life.

If someone is making excuses instead of changing their lives, it could be for several reasons. They may be afraid of what will happen on the other side. Or, they could be less motivated to change their life than they think.

8. Their goals are too big

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both their goals are too big YakobchukOlena from Getty Images Pro via Canva

To bring forward change, you need to set realistic goals. If you try to change your life in the most dramatic way possible, you may find yourself too afraid to move forward with it. Let’s say someone wants to move to another country, become a citizen, find a job, and get married there. These are all exciting goals, but they may be too big and overwhelming to tackle at the start. Instead, tackling small goals one by one can make the experience feel easier and less overwhelming.

We all dream big. However, by putting too much pressure on ourselves, we may never make the first move to change our lives. If someone struggles to be realistic, it may be a sign that they will never change their life, even if they desperately want to.

9. They wait for motivation

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they wait for motivation Tanya Gupta from Pexels via Canva

Motivation keeps us going. If we want to make a change, motivation is the way we accomplish it. However, not everyone has natural motivation moving through their blood. Sometimes, people will wait for that big spark to hit, that ‘ah-ha’ moment. Not everyone will experience this. If someone is waiting on motivation, it could be an excuse that keeps them from ever changing their entire lives, even though they want to.

Some people wait for motivation instead of putting themselves out there. This can keep them in the same place. If change is what they’re after, and motivation never strikes, they will likely stay the same.

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10. They believe it’s all-or-nothing

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they believe its all or nothing Zurijeta via Canva

All-or-nothing thinking can keep someone from changing their lives. Sometimes, they know this. It may be that they choose this thought pattern. While they may want to usher in change, it isn’t likely what they will do. All-or-nothing thinking can keep someone from working towards their goals. If things aren’t going their way entirely, they may just stop working towards it altogether.

“This type of all-or-nothing thinking can lead to depression because of past mistakes and anxiety about future performance at school or work. Perfectionism also does not reflect reality. Nobody is perfect, and nothing is perfect; but it can be great, mediocre, or even excellent,” says Salene M. W. Jones, Ph.D.

11. They want immediate rewards

people who desperately want to change their entire lives but probably never will usually have reasons for both they want immediate rewards Atahan Demir from Pexels via Canva

Some people may want to change their lives, but don’t have the patience to wait for the rewards. They may be sick of the mundane life they live. It encourages them to make a change, but because they are seeking instant gratification, they may not. Making a major change takes hard work. It’s not something that comes with the snap of our fingers.

Without the gratification of immediate change, someone may choose not to change their lives. Even if it’s something they want, this mindset can hold them back. A lack of patience may be a deal breaker for some people.

Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.