People Who Stay Mentally & Emotionally Calm Usually Say 10 Phrases In Casual Conversation

We all have overwhelming days that make it easy to get stuck in our heads. Sometimes we find ourselves ruminating on a person, place, or thing. We replay conversations and go over the things we "should" have said. We think about the past. We think about the future. We forget about the present. And, we focus on the problem, imagined or real. Within seconds, the spin begins, and we can go from sanity to insanity in less time than it takes to light a match.

What I know is that there is always a moment, no matter how brief, where a choice is made. I can choose to fall down the rabbit hole with the Mad Hatter, or I can pause and choose to stay mentally & emotionally calm. Here is a list of ten phrases calm people say in casual conversation that help put things into perspective and get re-centered.

Mentally and emotionally calm people often say these phrases casually:

1. 'First things first'

While there may be a lot of stressful things in your life, it's important to realize that you can't do everything at once. Try to figure out what needs to be done first, make a list of action items, and calmly check them off one by one. 

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2. 'How important is it?'

If something is bothering you and taking up all of your time, try to sit back and wonder if it's as important as you think it is. (Spoiler alert: It's usually not.)

3. 'Feelings aren’t facts'

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Just because you feel and think a certain way about yourself and your life doesn't mean it's true. Not every fleeting though that runs through that busy mind of yours is true. 

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4. 'HALT: Am I hungry, angry, lonely, or tired?'

If you find yourself grumpy a lot, there may be a simple solution, like a nap, a meal, or scheduling a dinner date with your best friend to talk things out. 

5. 'My ego is not my amigo'

Your ego tells you lies. It's not your friend.

6. 'A bad moment doesn’t mean I have a bad life'

Everyone has embarrassing and bad moments. That doesn't mean your whole life is bad — that's catastrophizing, and it's incredibly dangerous. 

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7. 'WAIT: Why am I talking/texting?'

Maybe it's time to take a step back and think before you speak or send that text. If you're feeling rage-y or like your blood is about to boil, best to put the phone down and revisit when you're in a mellower mindset. 

8. 'It’s not personal'

This is hard to accept, but what people think of you has nothing to do with you; it's never personal.

9. 'Right size the problem instead of supersizing the problem'

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Try not to make a problem bigger than it is. 

10. 'Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?'

When you find yourself in a challenging situation, take a moment to pull out one of these tools from your toolbox so that you can reset and steady yourself. Mentally & emotionally calm people whip out these casual phrases when they feel like their hair is on fire, and they need to get a hose fast. 

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Gretchen Hydo is a certified professional coach, keynote speaker, nationally syndicated advice columnist, and thought leader.