Mentally & Emotionally Childish Adults Tend To Use 9 Phrases That Instantly Prove They Haven't Grown Up
GaudiLab | Shutterstock I don’t have much patience for dealing with childish people. It can be hard to remind myself that some people like this dealt with trauma in their early years that prevented them from emotionally maturing as adults. It’s not just me who feels this way. Childish adults face widespread rejection because of their actions, but they may not understand why. Often, their behavior is completely normal in their eyes.
Life is hard, and there are constant complications we need to be prepared for. It’s not fair to blame everyone else for our feelings and refuse to take accountability when we hurt other people. With childish behavior comes a lack of self-awareness, and it can put serious strain on relationships.
9 phrases mentally & emotionally childish adults often use that prove they haven't grown up
1. ‘This is all your fault’
Childish people struggle to take accountability for their actions. It’s easier to ignore their own faults when they're blaming others, after all. Emotionally immature people often have a hard time navigating their feelings, and often take that frustration out on others.
Maintaining healthy relationships isn’t always easy for a person with emotional immaturity. When they feel hurt, they may yell and scream at others, bullying them into believing they are the problem, and try to manipulate people by claiming they did nothing wrong.
Someone who quickly points the finger at you with force behind their words and no acknowledgment of their own actions may be mean, but they also may simply be emotionally immature. That doesn't mean you have to tolerate it, of course.
2. ‘It’s not fair!’
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I hate when people say that life isn’t fair, but there is some truth to that. We will all endure things that feel completely unnecessary. It can be something major like the loss of a pet, or maybe watching someone snag the promotion that was supposed to go to you. No matter the reasoning, we have all gone through moments where we couldn’t help but ask, ‘Why me?’
Even though it’s hard, most people know they have to push through and make it to the other side of the situation. With hard work and processing their emotions, they can have a better attitude toward the situation.
We hear this phrase often from teenagers who feel like the world is out to get them. If they never grow out of this mindset, they can carry it into adulthood and blame others for what’s going on in their lives rather than owning it.
3. ‘I'll apologize if you say you're sorry first’
Everyone makes mistakes, and it can be hard taking accountability, even when we hurt someone. Still, the average mature adult wants to apologize for these actions and won't make it contingent on the other person's behavior.
Taking accountability shows emotional maturity and can make them good, supportive friends and partners. It makes us feel closer to the people in our lives, creating healthy and strong bonds that last a long time.
When multiple people are feeling upset, everyone must apologize. If someone is extremely childish, they may try to hold out on their end, demanding that people say sorry first. It’s often because they don’t feel they did anything wrong in the first place. After all, it takes serious emotional awareness to admit when they are wrong, which they don’t have. They’re only the victim, never the perpetrator.
4. ‘Everybody else does it’
Have you ever watched someone self-destruct in front of you? They’re making bad decisions or falling in line with whatever everyone else is doing to fit in. This can get them in trouble, and they may not care because they are getting fulfillment out of it. If you try to talk to them about it, they may claim everyone else is doing it, so why should it be a big deal?
A childish adult may be more drawn to groupthink. They may fear rejection and instead follow the pack to make sure they still fit in. This can be a dangerous situation that puts them at risk of danger, but they don’t care. They’ll defend their choices by saying they wanted to fit in with everyone else.
5. ‘I said what I said’
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Holding a childish person accountable for saying something unkind or even incorrect isn’t easy. They often struggle to see the faults in their behavior. Instead, they’ll double down and stand behind their words, even if it was harmful to people they care about. It’s hard for them to find vulnerability and take responsibility for their behavior.
Saying that they said what they said can be a sign that they’re not worried about how you feel. Apologizing takes serious work, and childish people often don’t have the patience or maturity to do so. Worse, it forces them to face the fact that they need to slow down before
6. ‘I don’t care what you think’
Some people genuinely feel this way. They have confidence in themselves not to let the words of others get them down. This attitude takes emotional maturity that a childish person doesn’t have. They are able to be unbothered by others' opinions because they are guided by a strong moral compass and their own values.
But when childish people throw this phrase around, it may not be because they don’t care about other people’s critiques. It's more likely that they genuinely don’t care if what they said hurt someone else. Either that or it's all a front, and if they didn't act like they don't care everyone would see they are imperfect, which immature people can't tolerate.
Emotionally immature people often have some narcissistic traits. They avoid compromise and demand that everything be done their way. This behavior is off-putting and makes others assume they are childish.
7. ‘Get over it’
Childish people can be good at emotional manipulation, often in the same way toddlers are: with meltdowns and pouting. They want to control people to ensure they can get what they want in every situation. By criticizing another person and convincing them they’re overreacting, they think they’ll get away with their immature behavior.
I don’t know about you, but if someone tells me to get over something, I’m likely to do the opposite. It makes me angrier and will cause me to lash out. Childish people may want this reaction to continue any arguments they are having. As long as they’re getting attention, they don’t care if it’s negative.
8. ‘If you loved me, you would’
Guilt is a strategy childish people use to get what they want. If they’re used to getting their way no matter what, they’ll try to convince others to give it to them no matter what route they have to take. This is another form of emotional manipulation. They are intentionally making someone feel bad for their own gain.
This phrase shows that this person has never grown up. They’re hoping the people in their lives will fall for their mind games as their parents did. Thankfully, some people are learning to stand up to emotional manipulation, putting childish people like this in their place.
9. ‘I am what I am’
It’s important to stand firm in who you are. Confidence goes a long way and can help people respect you.
But it’s different when someone immature uses a phrase like this. That doesn't necessarily mean it's bad, though. After all, this could be a sign they are showing you exactly who they are and if you don't like it, know that they probably won't change.
This isn't always easy. We want to see the best in people and try to look past words like this, but in reality, they're telling you that they are someone who doesn’t care if you don’t like something they did, they’ll continue to do it anyway.
People will reveal their true nature to you, even if it isn’t instant. Over time, you’ll pick up on phrases that show you they are immature and unwilling to grow up. Refusing to make productive changes can be a sign that they’ll never change and might be immature forever.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
