Photo: Halay Alex / Shutterstock
Being attractive isn't all about looks.
By Amber Madison — Last updated on Mar 02, 2023
You want to get a guy to like you. So you spend hours perfecting your hair and makeup and throw on your best outfit. You go out to a bar with a friend and settle into a corner table with your girlfriend and wait…
But no guys approach. Why?
When it comes to being attractive, it does not just look that gets a guy to notice you. You could be the prettiest girl in the room, but being approachable and getting a guy to want you are more than how you look or what you're wearing.
So what can you do to be more attractive?
Here are 5 little tricks popular women use to be more attractive to men:
1. Have fun
There’s nothing more attractive to a guy than a girl who’s just fun to be around. When you’re out at a bar, be the life of the party. Goof off, laugh, throw straw wrappers at each other, and just have fun with your friends and enjoy their company.
Not only will guys want to approach you, but they’ll also be less intimidated because you’ll look like a fun, sweet, approachable girl.
2. Move around
Think about it. How scary is it for a guy to approach a table of girls sitting down who look like they want to keep to themselves? That type of situation screams “strikeout,” and believe it or not, guys are pretty sensitive about that.
Instead of sitting down at a table, stand in the bar area, or dance around a little bit if there is music playing. Show guys that you are at the bar to meet people, not to keep to yourself.
3. Smile
The stress of your everyday life can quite literally wear itself on your face. If things are tense at work, at home, or in any other area of your life, chances are your resting facial expression is not exactly calling anyone towards you.
Make a constant effort to smile as you go about your day (whether in a bar or not). Smiling makes you look like a friendly girl who would be nice to talk to — exactly the kind of non-threatening vibe you should be giving off in order to get hit on.
4. Dress down
It may seem counter-intuitive to dress down when you go out, but sometimes being the girl in the cute t-shirt makes you stand out more from the rest of the crowd.
If you look around a bar, most girls are dressed pretty much the same way: tight jeans tucked into boots with a bright top that may or may not involve sequins, zippers, sashes, or other types of flair. Not that you should go out in your gym clothes, but wearing minimal makeup and simple clothes can make you look down to earth, comfortable in your own skin, and low maintenance.
5. Make eye contact
If you’ve spotted a hottie and want to lure him over, nothing says “come hither” like a little eye contact. The key is to make eye contact, and hold it until it starts to make you feel a little uncomfortable. Then hold it for one more second… then look away.
Some girls prefer the “look, look-linger” method. Make eye contact for a second, look away, then look back at him and hold it. Making eyes at him gives him permission to make a move on you.
There’s a reason that when it rains it pours, and when you’re not looking you find someone. The reason is when you’re out and about, just trying to have a good time, and are genuinely having fun, you radiate. You look like the type of girl that’s fun to be with, independent, and not trying too hard to impress anyone. You look like the type of girl that makes guys wonder: “Sooo….you come here often?”
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Amber Madison is a co-founder of Peoplism. Her thought leadership has been featured everywhere from The Today Show to MTV to NPR as well as in Fast Company, The Atlantic, The Wall Street Journal, Newsweek, and many more.