11 Everyday Behaviors That Quietly Reveal Someone Feels Lost In Life
These easily overlooked behaviors quietly signal when someone feels disconnected from their purpose.
Photoroyalty / Shutterstock When someone is feeling lost in life, their lack of purpose will often show itself in their everyday behaviors. They might begin to overthink simple choices, such as what they want to order at the restaurant. Even when they have a victory, they still feel empty inside because they're unsure of what that victory is leading them towards.
They may also try to hide the fact that they feel so deeply lost by using distractions to avoid the problem head-on, but if you pay attention to their actions, you will be able to see what is really going on.
These are 11 everyday behaviors that quietly reveal someone feels lost in life
1. They can't make up their minds
People Images | Shutterstock
When someone feels lost in life, they can quietly reveal it by struggling to stick to a decision. These decisions can range from small to big: holding up the line when they can't decide what to eat for lunch, or going back and forth from wanting to leave their job or not.
This person balances the good and the bad in every little decision they make, taking their time to choose carefully because they aren't sure which will help them gain some sense of direction in their life.
2. Zoning out in conversations
MDV Edwards | Shutterstock
If someone you're talking to ever starts to stare off into the distance in the middle of the conversation, chances are they're feeling lost in life. A simple conversation isn't enough to anchor them in reality, and they prefer to drift off into space as a way to step away from the real world temporarily.
These conversations can be catch-ups with friends, and when a friend notices what's happening, it can make them feel ignored, which can hurt the relationship. In other cases, this can even occur at work, which poses an even greater risk.
RELATED: 11 Phrases Brilliant People Use When They Zoned Out & Didn't Hear What Someone Said
3. Showing up late
Andrii Lemelianenko | Shutterstock
This behavior reveals that someone feels lost in life, as they feel there's no reason to do anything, including showing up on time. When a person does this, they don't just waste other people's time, but they also let others know they shouldn't trust them in the future.
Being late also harms this person's loved ones. Dr. Aaron Ben-Zeev says that punctuality is necessary in loving relationships. "Lateness can indeed hurt those we love, and we should try to prevent it as much as possible," he notes.
4. Doomscrolling
Dan Gutu | Shutterstock
If you see someone who aimlessly scrolls through their phone with no light behind their eyes, they might be feeling a bit lost in life, with no set direction or goals. We all have our moments when we suddenly realize we've been on TikTok for an hour in the same position on our bed, but when someone starts doing it for three or four hours, often not in the comfort of their own home, a deeper problem may be at hand.
Doomscrolling not only affects these people mentally but also physically. Some of the physical effects of doomscrolling can be headaches, muscle tension, loss of appetite, and even elevated blood pressure.
5. Constantly comparing themselves
Diego Cervo | Shutterstock
Feeling lost in life often leads people to compare themselves to others who seem to be doing better than they are, in hopes of mimicking their behavior and achieving the same outcome. They might even start mirroring certain behaviors of their co-workers or friends who look as though their lives are together and stable.
The reality is that comparisons are never fair. Everyone has their own path, and comparing it to yours discredits your whole life experience leading up to that moment. As Dr. Magda Murawska puts it, "We are similarly too complex to rate ourselves based on the comparison to another, complex human being."
6. Walking sluggishly
Veja | Shutterstock
Someone who always has their head down as they walk and shuffle into work or home is often someone who is starting to feel lost in life. Their confidence is gone, and it's beginning to show physically.
Research shows that when someone has a higher purpose in life, they walk confidently and are less likely to walk slowly than someone who is struggling to find that purpose. Walking slowly also affects a person's health, as they are at a higher risk for cardiovascular disease.
7. Being overly agreeable
Andrii Lemelianenko | Shutterstock
A person who feels lost in life never knows when to say no and always tries to be agreeable in any situation, hoping it'll help any outcome they encounter and eventually improve their life. They might also feel as though they have nothing to lose by saying yes.
When this person forces themselves to say yes even when their instinct is to say no, they usually still go against their own best wishes and remain agreeable. Survival, along with guilt and fear, is what prevents this type of person from saying yes.
8. Avoiding eye contact
MDV Edwards | Shutterstock
When you're talking to someone and they struggle to make eye contact, they may be afraid you'll see the despair in their eyes, which can lead you to ask if they're okay when, in reality, they're just lost in life. Admitting that someone is lost forces them to look and reflect on the choices they made that led them there. They're not ready for that sort of self-confrontation.
Eye contact not only respects the other person, but it also shows that you're actively listening. By not doing so, you can put yourself in a tough spot, especially if this happens during work.
9. Refusing compliments
Farknot Architect | Shutterstock
A person who feels lost in life feels disconnected from themselves and their ambitions, so when someone compliments them, they find it hard to believe it. Even if it's small, like, "Your outfit looks nice today," they'll refuse to accept the compliment, since they probably thought very little about their appearance.
When someone is unsure of the direction their life is heading, they are also uncertain about the decisions they make daily. They find it easier to deny themselves the validation and recognition they deserve than to accept it.
10. Saying 'someday' statements
Egoitz Bengoetxea | Shutterstock
Using "someday" statements can be a sign that someone is currently feeling lost in life. They say that they'll get the promotion "someday," or that they'll be able to "someday" be happy. This person is not sure how they'll ever reach that goal when they have no set direction or plans to start working toward it.
Being able to state what you want clearly is one thing, and planning actually to achieve it is the first step to getting there. Even if something seems so unattainable, finding new ways to get closer to your purpose in life is what keeps many people going and thriving.
11. Romanticizing their past
Fizkes | Shutterstock
A person who starts to feel lost in life often doesn't see a bright future and would rather reminisce about past successes than come to terms with their current reality. Looking back on their previous wins makes them feel better about themselves. It reminds them that they did have it together at one point.
When someone finds themselves completely lost in life, the best thing to do is actually acknowledge it. Someone who constantly denies they don't know what they're doing will never be able to help themselves get better. Once this is addressed, they can determine what to do next to get back on the right track.
It's important to remember that being lost in life can look different for everyone; some may seem to have it together when, secretly, they're breaking down inside. If someone starts to notice that they're exhibiting these behaviors, that's the first step to a better, more fulfilling life.
Doreen Albuerne is a writer with a bachelor's degree in journalism, covering relationships, mental health, and lifestyle topics.
