Brilliant People Use 11 Casual Phrases To Start A Conversation With Literally Anyone
Nat | Unsplash Whether at a grocery store or in the middle of a work event, we've all been in a situation where we needed or wanted to talk to someone but didn't know where to start. Striking up a conversation with a random stranger isn't always easy, but brilliant people know there are casual phrases they can use to start a conversation with literally anyone.
Research published in 2023 found that loneliness is a major problem in the US and is only becoming increasingly widespread. If you feel lonely, or if you want to help others who do, brushing up on on your conversational skills is a great way to take a proactive first step.
Brilliant people often use these phrases casually to talk to anyone:
1. 'You look really nice today, did you do something different?'
Gorgev / Shutterstock
Let's be real for a moment: everyone loves a good compliment. When someone just got their hair done or a fresh set of acrylic nails, it feels nice for others to take notice and react positively. Knowing this, a casual phrase brilliant people use to start a conversation with literally anyone is, "You look really nice today, did you do something different?"
A 2020 study revealed that compliments make people feel better about themselves and that most people underestimate just how much compliments impact others. That said, be sure that when you give a compliment, it's sincere. Most people can tell when others truly mean what they say or when they're simply playing nice to keep peace.
2. 'How is so and so doing?'
Brainslav Nenin / Shutterstock
When someone's at a family gathering or a work party, it can feel intimidating to strike up a conversation. Their mind runs wild with what to say to make the situation less awkward. During these moments, it's easy to let our emotions get the better of us and unconsciously shut down mid-conversation. Yet, there's one casual phrase brilliant people use to start a conversation with literally anyone that would be best in situations like these. By saying, "How is so and so doing?" someone effectively opens up the conversation and relieves some of the pressure of having to talk about themselves.
This phrase also helps people bond, as having mutual friends makes it increasingly easier to connect with others. Known as the triadic closure effect, two people who have mutual friends are increasingly likely to become friends themselves, according to Cornell University.
3. 'What do you think about this?'
Ground Picture / Shutterstock
Everyone has an opinion about everything. Whether it's celebrity gossip, clothing choices, or what to watch on Netflix, people naturally allow their opinions to guide them. People also love expressing their opinions to others, which falls under the category of wanting to be heard — and according to a study published in 2023, feeling heard is the cornerstone of any relationship.
So, the next time someone is out shopping, don't feel shy about asking a random stranger or friend, "What do you think about this?" Most of the time, people will be eager to express just how they feel without any coaxing on the other person's part.
4. 'Hey, I noticed you and I both like [insert thing you both like here]'
Antonio Guillem / Shutterstock
Finding ways to be relevant is the most foolproof way to start a conversation with literally anyone. According to a study in 2016, liking people who are similar to us is quite literally hard-wired in people's brains. That said, knowing how to relate to others can get a bit tricky. After all, how do people find stuff to relate to on a random Tuesday while shopping at a grocery store with strangers? It doesn't need to be all that complicated, though. Simply looking at what a person's wearing or what they have in their cart can be the perfect opportunity to find common ground.
And don't be shy about it! Though it might be intimidating to strike up a conversation, that doesn't mean the other people will think oddly of you. Most likely, they'll respond better than anticipated and eagerly gush about their favorite frozen pizza or why a certain makeup brand is better than another.
5. 'I'm looking for somewhere to eat, do you have any suggestions?'
iryna Inshyna / Shutterstock
Brilliant people know they can start a conversation with anyone by asking about their favorite local spot. Believe it or not, most people love to make suggestions and discuss their favorite sushi joint. (After all, people in general adore talking about themselves and their own self-interests.) That said, approaching this person and striking up a random conversation might feel intimidating for those who are a teeny bit shy. Simply smiling and speaking in a friendly voice will cause most people to lower their guard and give you their best place to grab a burger or slice of pizza.
6. 'Wow, you are really good at this'
BearFotos / Shutterstock
On the surface, this casual phrase might sound a bit insincere. After all, saying, "Wow, you are really good at this," can come off that way if people aren't careful with their tone. However, if someone truly wants to start a conversation with literally anyone, then tone matters a lot. Most people will feel at ease if they hear someone utter this phrase excitedly and will appreciate you acknowledging their talent or hard work. A 2022 study found that praising children, for instance, leads to a boost in their self-esteem and competence. So, the next time you notice someone who is displaying their talents, don't feel scared to comment on it. Most people will take it the right way and feel awesome that you cared enough to even comment.
7. 'Did you hear about what happened recently?'
Josep Suria / Shutterstock
The casual phrase, "Did you hear about what happened recently?" can quickly open up to any person. Of course, discussing these current events can be a slippery slope and should be taken with caution. After all, talking about things like politics might not do so well with most individuals, especially if they're opinionated or get easily riled up. That said, this doesn't mean that all topics are off the table.
Discussing a local news story or celebrity gossip isn’t something to shy away from, and chatting about random good news stories like a kitten being saved can bring humor and joy into an otherwise bland conversation. Just like anything in life, there’s a need for balance: Steer clear of any controversial topics and strictly focus on safer ones. This is the best and safest way to start a conversation with literally anyone.
8. 'The weather has been crazy lately, right?'
Monkey Business Images / Shutterstock
Striking up a conversation about your surroundings might sound a bit boring or even cliché. After all, what will pointing out the weather truly do in the grand scheme of things? But most people underestimate the importance of simplicity. After all, most conversations usually start with a simple phrase like this one. The next time someone is waiting in line, try observing the weather. If it's a beautiful day, don't be afraid to comment on that. This small phrase can quickly turn into a full-fledged conversation as you eventually pivot to discussing your interests or what you both like to do in your spare time.
9. 'The funniest thing just happened'
Josep Suria / Shutterstock
Another casually brilliant phrase people use to start a conversation with literally anyone is, "The funniest thing just happened." It should go without saying that most people love a good anecdote. Telling the right story is important, though. If someone tries to tell a funny story but it's inappropriate or slightly offensive, most people, especially strangers, might not take it too kindly, so it's best to stick with harmless or even cheesy anecdotes. Will it make people roll their eyes in disbelief? Absolutely. But even a corny tale can make the most serious person smile big if it lands right.
10. "What's the most interesting thing you have planned today?"
Antonio Guillem / Shutterstock
This phrase is a bit more intense, and some people might not feel comfortable uttering it for fear of coming off as creepy or intrusive. However, saying this phrase isn't as bizarre as people might think. A study published in 2021 found that most people love deep questions, even strangers. If someone says this casual phrase with a friendly smile and a pleasant voice, they'll find that most people will be receptive and welcoming to it.
11. "How was your day?"
Roman Samborskyi / Shutterstock
Finally, when all else fails, a phrase brilliant people use to start a conversation with literally anyone is, "How was your day?" After all, it's the go-to phrase that is guaranteed to engage others in a full-fledged conversation. Psychiatrist Samantha Boardman, M.D., said that talking about oneself lights up the same parts of people's brains as food and pleasure do. As she puts it, "Simply put, self-disclosure is gratifying." So, don't be shy about asking friends or strangers how their day was. Not only will it most likely put a smile on their face, but it will allow them to open up a bit about what's going o in their lives and feel encouraged to do so.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help topics such as relationships, career, family, and astrology.
