11 Bittersweet And Beautiful Things That Happen As You Get Older
Life gets better and better with time. You get to experience things that your younger self never could have imagined.
Dodokat / Shutterstock People tend to do all they can to prevent the aging process. They believe that life gets more and more difficult and less fulfilling. We think that our best years are passing us by, and the window of joy is rapidly closing on us. But people who have had the privilege of living to maturity know that there are some beautiful and bittersweet things that naturally happen as you age.
Getting older can be a wonderful thing if you have the right perspective. When you realize that your best days in front of you, not behind you, there are things that organically unfold, making you see that the knowledge and experience you have gain through the years makes life so much sweeter.
Here are 11 bittersweet and beautiful things that happen as you get older
1. You learn to let go
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When we were young, we assumed that the people we cared about would be around forever. Over time, some passed away while others went in different life directions, leaving us to wonder what went wrong. Opportunities that we thought would always be there dried up, and we had to seek out new ones.
Growing older means that you start to understand that not everything Is meant to last. The only thing guaranteed in life is change. Friendships fade, chapters close, and people leave. Yes, it hurts, but with age you learn to let go and open your heart to what's next.
2. Your parents become human
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As young people, we treat our parents are resources instead of functional human beings with their own needs, flaws, and feelings. We place high expectations on them and hold them accountable for the impossible. But then the realization hits that our moms are just girls, still seeking acceptance and approval, and our dads are the same little boys that needed to be affirmed decades ago.
The older I get, the more I see my parents as more than my caregivers or people whose main purpose in life was to fix my problems. They are flawed and complex individuals, just like you and me, and were doing the best they could in this parenting experiment. My mother and I have a friendship filled with acceptance, validation, and support.
3. You stop rushing and become more present
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Remember when life was one anxiety-inducing rollercoaster of ups and downs. Even in peaceful moments, you could see the next drop or incline on the horizon and stayed "on" constantly. That tendency to always be rushing wreaked havoc on our mental and emotional states.
Adulting meant that we realized depth and meaning are much more important than getting through mindless tasks as fast as we could. You start to move more intentionally and take the time to really savor experiences instead of racing through them.
4. You find solitude peaceful
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Young people tend to surround themselves with others, so they never have to be alone. They equate solitude with boredom and loneliness and are always looking for the next thing that will make their life more exciting. This over-dependence on outside forces to make them fulfilled and whole sets them up for a rude awakening later in life.
When you get older, what once felt like unbearable loneliness starts to feel like peace. You begin to enjoy your own company and feel more self-aware. You see stillness as a gift, not a punishment or a rejection from the world around you. The sacred space that belongs only to you is something you wouldn't trade for anything.
5. Your love is less loud and more deep
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Before we know better, we think that really loving means you have to yell it from the rooftops. We value grand declarations of love that let everyone who sees them know that someone saw enough value in us to share their feelings with the world. Then we grew up and found out that those actions were mostly performative and lacked depth.
Love becomes less about putting on a show and more about being present, showing patience, and being comfortable with quiet expressions as we age. It's softer, but more long-lasting, and settles much deeper in the soul. It's reliable, trusting, and consistent.
6. You learn that closure is an inside job
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I can't count the number of closure conversations I had with friends as a young woman. We desperately needed that last conversation with a guy to understand why things didn't work out or to get the apology that would fix it all. The irony was that even when we got that, we never felt true closure.
The truth is that closure can never come from anyone but you. A person's disrespectful actions, hurtful words, or abandonment turn out to be the closure you need as you get older and wiser. You stop waiting for apologies or explanations and realize you don't need permission to heal. That's heartbreaking and empowering at the same time.
7. Your dreams change
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Dreams are an interesting thing. They are based on your perception of the world around you and your understanding of who you are. So, it's only natural that aging and learning more about life and yourself result in your dreams shifting. You find out what's important to you and let go of things that no longer serve you.
Maturity leads you to stop chasing the version of success you once thought you needed. Your dreams evolve and turn more meaningful and personal. You no longer need others to co-sign your aspirations because you care less about applause and more about authenticity.
8. You revisit old memories with new eyes
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In the past few years, I have forgiven and empathized with people whom I used to believe I would hate forever. I took their actions very personally and thought they had intentionally sought to harm me. Over time, with a fresh and grown-up perspective, I came to understand it was more about them than it was me.
With time, painful memories soften, and the sweet ones that you ignored because you were so hurt and traumatized become more prevalent. You realize the two things can be true. You had terrible experiences, but you also had beautiful ones. You take the lessons from your calamities and even start to feel grateful for them.
9. You accept that you will never have all the answers
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Young people have a natural curiosity. They need to know the whys of everything and make it their personal mission to find out. The problem is that there are times when the answers won't come, leaving them with a knowledge gap burning in the back of their minds. One day, they stop chasing responses and start moving on without them.
Not everything will come to you wrapped neatly in a bow. There are mysteries that will forever be unsolved, and you have to get comfortable with that. Knowing that some things occur for reasons unknown that that is okay, is a sign that you are transforming and growing. Being okay if you get the answer and okay if you don't is a beautiful place to be.
10. You start to be nicer to yourself
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It's easy to get down on yourself when you fall short or make mistakes. You ask yourself how you could have been so ignorant or tell yourself that you are just not good enough. You haven't yet learned that making mistakes is the bittersweet part of life. Yes, it's disappointing, but it's also necessary.
When you stop criticizing yourself for every misstep and start offering yourself the support, grace, and compassion that you extend to others, you become your own safe space. Doing so required knowledge and experience that you can only get by allowing life to slowly unfold before your eyes and figuring it out.
11. You realize life is happening now, not someday
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The past is over. The future hasn't happened yet. The present is a gift that, if you're not careful, can be easily overlooked and become a regretful past. Sometimes, as younger people, we are focused on the wrong things so much that we forget to enjoy the moment. We let life pass us by when we should be stopping to smell the roses.
The future stops feeling infinite as we age. We understand that it is not guaranteed and that what really matters is today. So, we show up fully and intentionally. We watch the sun rise and set, spend more time with the people we love, and find the small joys in life that make it the most beautiful gift we could ever have.
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, and the author of seven books. She focuses on lifestyle and human interest stories that deliver informative and actionable guidance on interpersonal relationships, enlightenment, and self-discovery.
