People With Old-School Parents Usually Learned 9 Life Skills That Sound Harsh To Younger Generations
PeopleImages | Shutterstock As anxiety and fear come into focus, parenting today has shifted toward much more overbearing styles. But old-school parents just a few decades ago were far more lenient.
Yes, they still disciplined their kids, but they also let them roam free and grow through adversity, instead of saving them immediately. There were many life skills and lessons that might sound harsh to young generations, but were essential to their lives.
Life skills people with old-school parents learned that sound harsh to younger generations
1. Entertaining themselves
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While parents today coddle their kids and try to keep them busy all the time, people with old-school parents knew they had to entertain themselves. If they even muttered "I'm bored," they would suddenly have a million new chores to do. So, instead, they went outside and explored without supervision.
For kids with overbearing parents, it sounds like a dream, but it also came with a lot of challenging learning experiences and uncomfortable growth for many generations of children.
2. Building thick skin
Resilience is a trait that many older generations have in high levels. They spent a lot of time alone and were raised in a scarcity mindset, having no choice but to be resourceful and use their brains.
Even when it came to discipline and learning to accept guidance from authority figures, these generations were forced to have thick skin. They had to learn from mistakes and keep a clear head, because their parents were rarely around to solve their problems for them.
3. Doing household labor
Household labor doesn't mean basic chores. Older generations were doing real labor as children.
If they lived in the country, that usually meant doing labor on the farm by taking care of animals and doing all sorts of physical activity. Other kids washed cars by hand and mowed the lawn, spending entire days at a time helping with exhausting responsibilities.
They weren't bribed with an allowance. They didn't get constant praise. They were just expected to play a role and contribute to their household.
4. Learning the true value of money
Children form attitudes about money and start building their financial literacy incredibly early in life, sometimes as early as five years old. So, kids today might be behind from having parents unwilling to speak about money at home growing up or from getting everything they want out of convenience.
But old-school parents were quite different. Yes, they obviously grew up in a very different economic environment, but ideas about instant gratification weren't coming to fruition either. Kids weren't getting what they wanted immediately from online delivery services.
Instead, parents made their kids earn rewards and gifts. They learned the value of money because they had to work for what they wanted and then wait for it.
5. Advocating for themselves
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When fights broke out on the playground or in the unsupervised neighborhood, kids with old-school parents had to figure it out themselves. That's part of why unstructured play predicts better problem-solving and social skills in kids, because they have to lean into challenges to practice on a daily basis.
Old-school parents expected their kids to stand up for themselves and set their own boundaries. They weren't going to come to school to argue with a teacher on their child's behalf or step into a disagreement between two students. They let their kids be their own people, and they grew up to be quite capable.
6. Self-soothing
While kids today might be used to coddling comfort from parents when they had a tantrum or emotional outburst, old-school parents weren't afraid to turn a blind eye. They gave discipline and then sent their kids on their way to learn emotional regulation skills on their own.
Kids had to self-soothe, because crying and throwing a fit didn't change anything. They weren't going to get their way. They weren't going to get any more attention from their parents. They had to figure it out.
7. Working hard without complaint
Working hard and being exhausted were normal for many older generations. They taught their kids to take pride in being tired after a long day of work, and to hold their work ethic to an incredibly high standard.
But they were also scolded for complaining. They rarely had a safe space to speak about their emotions, which seems harsh and cruel to kids whose parents are much more gentle today.
For kids of old-school parents, they had to work hard without expecting anything and find internal motivation first, which serves them today in so many powerful ways.
8. Using encyclopedias and books for research
To a generation reliant on their phones, the idea of going fully analog for a school project or to find an answer to something they'd just Google feels like a crime. But for decades, kids and young adults had no other choice.
Yes, they sidestepped all the consequences of children having smartphones before they became teenagers, but they also practiced their reading comprehension and concentration early enough to secure it for life.
9. Cooking for themselves
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Cooking meals without help from parents sounds insane to young people today who lack basic skills in the kitchen. But for the latchkey generation, and so many before them, they had no choice.
If they didn't pack a lunch for school, they'd go hungry. If they didn't help cook meals for the family, they faced discipline. If they weren't around to cook for their siblings as an eldest child, they'd be the one to blame.
They had to learn by doing, even if that's a nightmare for anxious, afraid parents today.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
