People Who Need To Talk About The Same Thing Over & Over Again In Order To Process It Usually Have 9 Distinct Traits
Julia M Cameron | Pexels Talking about emotions out loud as they ebb and flow is truly therapeutic.
That's why people who need to talk about the same thing over and over again to process it usually share some very important traits. They're not willing to shove issues under the rug or pretend they're fine when they're not. They're going to talk about it.
People who need to talk about the same thing to process it have these traits in common
1. They trust their people
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When you have a close circle of friends or family that you trust with your emotions, talking about the same problems over and over again is cathartic. They'll always have your back, but they'll also create space for your feelings, making you feel heard in ways that not everyone else can.
When you're struggling with understanding an emotion inside of you, just getting it out helps them to connect the dots and offer a perspective you might not have considered. That's why healthy adult friendships are so fundamental to our well-being, even when you don't see each other often or come back to the same conversations during every hangout.
2. They're self-aware
When you're truly self-aware, you don't just notice and acknowledge your emotions. You also accept them and take action to mediate them.
For these kinds of people, that usually means talking about emotions out loud to work through them, and finding a way to accept them by piecing together the puzzle and shaping their perspective.
In order to talk about the same thing again and again, someone needs to have some level of self-awareness. At least, if they want to heal or make progress. Someone lacking this reflection might talk about a struggle or experience, but they're missing the deeper layer of personal feelings.
3. They're comfortable in themselves
Having a high sense of self-esteem and security often makes being vulnerable easier. They're able to cope with intense feelings like rejection or embarrassment without letting it crumble their entire sense of self.
So, someone willing to be introspective and expressive around their experiences feels more secure. Yes, they're coming back to the same issues, but they're also processing challenges and complex emotions without falling apart every time the topic comes up in conversation.
4. They're introspective
For people who avoid going inward and spending time with their own thoughts, it's more comfortable to avoid their problems for instant relief. But someone who's truly introspective and reflective about their life speaks about their emotions more often.
They're not afraid of going deeper in conversations or questioning why they feel the way they do. It doesn't scare them to bring up emotions. They don't run from vulnerability.
That's what makes these conversations so healing over time, because they approach new feelings and perspectives with a grace that some avoidant, insecure people lack.
5. They create closure for themselves
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When you're willing to speak about and process your experiences fully, without trying to hide or suppress anything, it's a lot easier to move on. Even if that means forgiving someone who clearly doesn't deserve it for your own well-being, it's something vulnerable people are willing to do.
They don't hold grudges because they've worked through their feelings. They don't keep resentment swirling around inside of them because they voice their issues. They don't need closure from anyone else because they can provide it for themselves.
6. They don't hold onto stress
Everyone gets stressed. Even if it's not to the same degree or through the same experience, it's impossible for someone to live a completely stress-free life, unless they're sheltered and privileged enough to avoid hardship entirely.
But people who talk about the same things have created a way to process their stress, so they're not letting it build up and grow inside of them over time. It's a part of their emotional intelligence, promoting better well-being and general life quality.
Regardless of what's going on around them, they have a practice that helps them accept and move on from stress that other people tend to bury themselves under.
7. They're willing to change their mind
If you're constantly bringing up the same experience and noticing shifts in your emotions, it's inevitable that you'll be pushed to change your mind. Some people push back against that inevitable feeling, trying to protect their side of the story or being right, but these people rarely do.
They bring up the same things and process their emotions by changing their mind. There's nobody to prove something to. They're just making sense of how they feel and trying to heal, and if those feelings change over time, then so be it.
8. They're not afraid to ask for help
Being willing to speak on emotions and be vulnerable requires the same level of inner security that asking for help does. If someone can't ask for help because they're afraid of seeming weak or dependent, they won't share their deepest feelings and emotions.
Most people also want to help, especially in a close circle of friends or a relationship, so speaking about issues only brings people closer and adds meaning to otherwise mundane conversations.
9. They have real depth
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Most people are some form of superficial. They're not honest or real about how they're feeling, because vulnerability feels like a personal attack on the image they're trying to promote.
Someone who needs to talk through emotions with others to process them can't fake it. They need these deep conversations and moments to feel secure, and they practice often.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
