11 Things A Woman Will Do When She Likes You But Is Trying Not To Show It
dotshock / Shutterstock Think back to your first schoolyard crush. How did you act around them? Likely, you wanted to pretend you didn’t like them at all. Although we are now adults, some of these behaviors have followed us.
Acting like we don’t like the person we’re crushing on is something we learned early on. As kids, we were likely afraid of being made fun of for our behavior. Now, we may believe we can land more men by playing hard to get. Even if a woman is trying hard to come off as uninterested, subtle behaviors will reveal that she is more interested than she lets on.
These are 11 things a woman will do when she likes you but is trying not to show it
1. Constantly fixing her hair
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I don’t know about you, but when I’m nervous, I can fiddle with my hair. Whether it’s brushing through with my fingers or putting it behind my ears (then, of course, moving it back again to repeat the endless cycle), it’s a habit I use in situations where I’m trying to play it cool. Some women may do this intentionally when they are trying to flirt subtly. She may be too nervous to make outward advances.
Playing with her hair or fixing it often to make sure it’s up to her standards can be a sign that a woman likes you. Even if she’s trying not to show, it’s a classic sign of flirtation. Next time you notice a woman doing this, she may like you but is trying to play it cool.
2. Refusing to make eye contact
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Eye contact can feel awkward. In fact, many people suffer from eye contact anxiety. This is a genuine response to locking eyes with someone. Looking into another person’s eyes can make us feel vulnerable. They say the eyes are the windows to the soul, and sometimes, it really does feel like that.
If you notice a woman is trying hard not to make eye contact with you, she may have feelings for you. She could be too anxious to lock eyes with you. Instead, she’s trying to pretend like she doesn’t like you, when it’s clear she does.
3. Making excuses to see you
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If you notice a woman is always making excuses to see you, it may be a sign that she likes you more than she lets on. Usually, someone like this will make small attempts to see you often.
Maybe she needs help with a work project, or something needs fixing around her house. She may call you up under the guise that she needs your help, when she’s just trying to find ways to see you. She may make requests of you that do not sound romantic, but are her way of getting you around her.
4. Remembering small details about you
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Have you told a woman in passing your favorite color? Maybe your favorite food or sports team? Little things that you think can be easily forgotten. If a woman knows these things about you, she’s listening to you deeply. It could be a sign that she likes you. She hangs on to every word you say.
When a woman holds this information, she may be weighing what she knows to decide if she likes you or if she’s just attracted to you. A woman who knows everything about you, even the small details, is likely into you. She may remember these things because she admires you.
5. Acting nervous
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If you’re hanging out with a friend, chances are you won’t feel very nervous. There is endless conversation to be had, and you enjoy their company. If someone is interested in you as more than a friend, they may come off as nervous around you.
They’ll do little things like fidgeting with jewelry or self-soothing methods like playing with their hair or massaging their neck. These are giveaways that they may not be completely confident around you, even though they are attracted to you.
We get nervous around people we like. It’s because we want to impress them. If a woman seems a bit nervous in your presence, she may be into you.
6. She’s quieter than usual
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If you know a woman is outgoing and boisterous around her friends but suddenly silent when you walk into the room, it could be a sign that she is seriously interested in you. When we like someone, we want to be on our best behavior around them. At the end of the day, our goal is to make them like us back. By being quiet, she may think she is playing it cool. She’s calm and collected and may be hoping it’s drawing you into her.
When a woman is interested in pursuing a man, she faces a lot of pressure. We are supposed to be friendly but not get friend-zoned. Kind but not overly passive. This can be overwhelming. As a result, she may seem a bit quieter than normal.
7. She sits facing you
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Body language says a lot when a woman likes a man. She may be too nervous to say how she feels upfront, but she can easily portray them through her actions. If she never has her back towards you in social situations, she may be interested in you. She wants to direct herself toward you. She may be wishing you would notice her. Subtle body language can give away her true intentions.
“It often conveys more than words and can show feelings that a person may not say out loud,” says Alison Tarlow, PsyD. “When it comes to attraction, our bodies sometimes ‘speak’ more honestly than our words, by making subconscious, little gestures that we may not even realize."
8. She gives subtle compliments
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If a woman likes you but doesn’t want to be too obvious about it, she may show it through subtle compliments. These are things that can be said casually to friends, but also signal she has an interest in you. There is a science to flirtation, a study has found. Some techniques are more effective than others. Sometimes, giving subtle compliments can say a lot. When a woman doesn’t want to come off too strong, she may make little comments that make you feel good.
Ultimately, she wants to point out the things she likes about you. She wants you to feel good about yourself while also subtly showing how much she likes you.
9. She banters playfully
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To me, playful banter is the most fun way to communicate with others. I love to joke around and poke fun at people. Respectfully, of course. It’s a way I connect with others. If a woman is often starting playful conversations with you, it may be a sign that she likes you but is trying not to show it.
A study found that teasing behavior builds social bonds. However, there is a fine line between being mean and being playful. If she makes you laugh with her banter, it may be intentional.
10. She keeps her eyes on you when you’re not looking
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Do you notice a woman is always subtly watching you? Sure, that may sound creepy. However, it’s not strange behavior. Instead, she’s always looking in your direction to see if you’re noticing her. She is hoping that you are noticing her the way she is you.
Meeting another person’s gaze is powerful. She may be hoping to have a special moment like that with you. It could be a subtle romantic gesture.
11. She’s hot and cold
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If you notice a woman is hot with you one second and cold the next, it may be a sign that they are interested in you. They may be trying to reel you in, then pull back when things get too close for their comfort. These are subtle signs that she likes you, but doesn’t want you to get too comfortable with it. She wants to keep you on your toes. While sometimes the behavior can make it seem like she doesn’t like you at all, it’s a technique some women use to flirt.
This type of behavior can be from a fear of intimacy. However, when a woman is interested in you, she may try to show you how much she likes you this way. She wants to reel you in.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
