11 Habits That Slowly Ruin A Man’s Reputation With Everyone In His Life
These behaviors can quickly change the way people view a person.
MAYA LAB / Shutterstock Someone’s reputation means everything to them. If they are beloved and respected, they are more likely to have better opportunities than those who are associated with negative traits. In a society where other people’s opinions seem to matter more than anything else, a bad reputation can make or break everything from your relationships to your career. Both men and women feel this pressure. Men, however, deal with stress differently.
For men, their career and reputation mean everything. While they value this, their behavior may show otherwise. “Some may think reputation doesn't matter or shouldn't matter, that we should all focus on doing our best, on being our best, and let others think what they may. Certainly, I agree we should never seek to manipulate what others think about us (it never works in the long run anyway), but to ignore the practical importance of a good reputation cheats us of many opportunities we might otherwise enjoy,” says Alex Lickerman, M.D., for Psychology Today. “Caring about our reputation doesn't mean we need others to like us. It means recognizing that as human beings we often can't help judging a book by its cover and that as long as the book itself is good, there's nothing wrong with caring about having an attractive cover around it.” Although a man might value his reputation, he can easily lose it by the way he acts.
These are 11 habits that slowly ruin a man’s reputation with everyone in his life
1. Broken promises
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We’ve all experienced the struggle of being with a man who is prone to breaking promises. This habit impacts his romantic relationships the most. When a woman chooses to settle down with a man who consistently lets her down, she will grow frustrated and unhappy.
Sometimes, it can be the littlest things. He may promise to do the dishes or put his laundry away. When days pass without him completing this task, his partner will become frustrated. Other times, it can be major things, a promise to stay faithful to her. She’ll begin to question how important the relationship is to him. Eventually, she could grow so sick of the way he constantly breaks his promises that she would leave him.
2. Being unreliable
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Being unreliable goes hand-in-hand with broken promises. Unreliable men, especially in the workplace, can slowly lose their reputation. When people rely on him to deliver, and he constantly falls short, they will stop giving him important tasks. They will lose trust in him. If they can't count on him to show up, he'll lose his reputation.
“Unreliability can also come from a desire to have more control over a situation. This applies to both the small stuff and the big,” pens Relate. “When we make someone wait for us by turning up late, we’re attempting to gain control over their actions. We make them appear to be the person who ‘cares’ more — and so gain the upper hand in a small way.”
3. Lying
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Lying is a sure way for a man to slowly ruin a relationship. He may be able to pull it off at first. Telling white lies can be the tipping point. They have an easy time convincing others of their falsehoods. However, as their lies become bigger and more frequent, their reputation will surely dwindle.
Choosing not to tell the truth destroys relationships. Whether they are personal or professional, it deeply damages the trust people have. Someone prone to lying will build a bad reputation over time. When this impacts a man, his job opportunities and romantic relationships will take the biggest hit. Trust means everything, and once it's gone, it's gone for good.
4. Avoiding responsibility
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To create a strong reputation, responsibility plays a major role. People need to know they can count on you. Your decisions have to be made wisely. Someone unable to take responsibility for their actions will quickly see their reputation crumble.
Everyone makes mistakes, but when a man refuses to take responsibility for their actions, it’s a red flag. “Taking full responsibility for your choices gives you access to total freedom. Most people avoid responsibility because they are afraid of the consequences of their free will,” says Elizabeth Whitworth for Shortform. “For example, psychiatrists say that most patients who are struggling with a sense of powerlessness don’t actually want to be responsible for their lives, so they give their power away to things outside of themselves and then wonder why they feel powerless.”
5. Disrespecting boundaries
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Boundaries are important. When someone places a boundary, they are doing so to protect their own mental health. Let’s say there’s a certain aspect of your life that is a tough spot. You want people to avoid bringing it up, especially if they are making jokes about it. You make that clear to a man, but he ignores it. He will make jokes about things that impact you without care for how you feel.
This behavior can slowly lead to the downfall of a man’s reputation. When boundary crossing becomes the norm, others will not feel comfortable around him. He will lose his relationships.
6. Gossiping
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The occasional gossiping between friends can be fun. When gossip becomes a constant, it will slowly chip away at a man’s reputation. When someone only has negative things to say about others, people will wonder what he is saying about them behind their backs.
Gossiping can make a person appear insecure. “If you really felt great about yourself and where you are in your own life, chances are you wouldn’t feel the need to try to chip away at someone else’s reputation by sharing stories that are none of your business,” writes Dana Wood on Medium. Insecure gossiping can change the way everyone views him.
7. Arrogance
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I’ll be the first to say that arrogance changes the way I think about others. I’m all for people celebrating their victories. In fact, people should be giving themselves more credit than they do! The difference between confidence and arrogance comes down to how someone treats others. When they think they are the best person in the world, their reputation will suffer.
Some people think the world revolves around them. They believe everything about themselves makes them superior to those around them. This behavior can impact a man’s reputation slowly, especially in the workplace. When someone is arrogant, his colleagues will want to avoid working with him. He will become disliked by those around him.
8. Unprofessional behavior at work
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We are all familiar with individuals who will do whatever it takes to reach the top of the career ladder. For some, this drive can positively impact their work ethic. They can be wonderful and unstoppable employees or leaders. However, when a man is willing to take down anyone in his way to get what he wants, his reputation will dwindle.
Stepping on others to achieve his goals is not the only way a man’s behavior at work can ruin his reputation. When he belittles women in the workplace, he can lose his job. If he acts flirtatiously or inappropriately with his female coworkers, his reputation will take a significant hit.
9. Financial blunders
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Financial mistakes can alter the way people perceive a person. When he’s unreliable with money, his ability to be trusted at work or in his personal relationships will begin to fade. This could be as small as lying to his wife about a slight decrease in his pay, or as major as stealing money from his employer or close friends.
“Bad financial decisions are like bad tattoos—they can stay with you forever, and they can be painful to fix,” says Joel McGriff of The McGriff Alliance. These choices are especially damaging when they ruin the trust someone had in you.
10. Rude behavior
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No one wants to deal with someone who is constantly rude. Rude behavior can ruin someone’s reputation. Have you ever been out to dinner with someone and watched the way they treated the food service workers? Looking down on and speaking poorly to the wait staff is rude and can instantly change the way I think of someone.
Or when someone is prone to putting others down. Tearing down another person's self-esteem to boost their own is deeply upsetting. Whether it’s in public, at work, or at home in their relationship, someone who is constantly rude becomes impossible to be around. No one wants to be in the presence of those who make a habit of belittling others around them.
11. Constant negativity
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Someone with a good reputation tends to be positive. Others love spending time with them. They lift people and bring light to every situation they’re in. A positive attitude makes someone magnetic.
We’ve all dealt with people who see the bad in everything. It seems like the world is out to get them. Nothing is fair. Everyone else gets what they deserve. It’s upsetting to be around and brings down the mood of everyone around them. As a result, it ruins their reputation.
“People who consistently speak in a critical manner, regardless of the reasons they do such, might not realize that by doing such they are constructing a negative reputation, one that can become a barrier for peace and happiness,” says Michael Toebe on Medium.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
