11 Subtle Insults Brilliant People Slip Into Work Emails With A Smile
No matter how much you may want to, you can't lose your professionalism after getting a frustrated email.
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock Sifting through your work emails can be quite the process, especially when you're in correspondence with colleagues or bosses that seemingly enjoy making you feel frustrated by the emails they're sending. Since it's work, you can't just outright speak your mind; otherwise, you'll end up getting called into HR or even receiving some kind of demotion. However, there are subtle insults brilliant people slip into work emails with a smile that give them some form of fun.
It's the perfect way to show that you disagree while keeping it polite because you're still in a professional environment. These remarks are able to fly under the radar, making them both clever and sometimes funny. For those on the receiving end of the emails, they usually have no idea that they're being poked a little, and even if they do, it's not outright enough for them to complain or make a big deal about it. Because sometimes you need to be a little passive-aggressive just to feel better.
Here are 11 subtle insults brilliant people slip into work emails with a smile
1. 'I appreciate your enthusiasm, even if the details don't quite add up'
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On the surface, this phrase is acknowledging someone else's energy or willingness to contribute, but there's also a bit of a subtle dig into their understanding. It's a polite way of saying that while you're glad that they're enthusiastic, it seems they may be missing the mark.
When someone is just confidently wrong, they just may not know that their bold ideas or solutions just aren't helping the situation at all. You're not being outwardly mean but instead attempting to soften the blow. You're not directly accusing anyone of being wrong or uninformed, but allowing the other person to amend their mistakes without feeling criticized or called out.
In the workplace, it's always best to approach with the mindset of wanting to help instead of trying to make that person feel bad. Constrictive critique should always be appreciated in a work environment, but it's all about how you deliver it that matters.
"Throughout your career, you'll always be given feedback in some form or another. Learning to cope with criticism is a key part of professional (and personal) growth, and when processed productively, it can actually boost your confidence and be extremely valuable for advancing your career," explained executive coach Melody Wilding.
2. 'Let's keep all options on the table for now'
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On the surface, this phrase gives off a more diplomatic and professional kind of vibe, but it's actually one of the subtle insults brilliant people slip into work emails with a smile, as beneath the polite response is the rejection of that other person's pitch they've brought to the table.
While you're still encouraging a level of collaboration, you're also gently sidelining their suggestion without actually shooting it down. Rather than actually causing friction or even a future conflict, you're giving space for others to present their ideas without bruising any egos.
That person's idea just wasn't what you were looking for, but you're not outright dismissing them entirely. It just ends up creating the illusion that there's a possibility for their idea to be somewhat useful in the future even though you definitely have zero plans of taking them up on that.
3. 'I see you're passionate about this'
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This phrase may seem encouraging at first, and maybe even supportive as well, but if you dig a little deeper, that person is saying their colleague may just be a little too invested. It's a way of acknowledging the strong feelings that they may have about a certain work project or idea without actually validating their passion.
"Emotions can act as a compass, pointing you toward what matters most to you and/or what aligns with your values. However, it is essential to avoid letting emotions dictate your decision-making. Make sure to balance emotional insights with logical reasoning," insisted executive coach and psychotherapist Moshe Ratson.
Just because you feel strongly about that thing doesn't mean that it's necessarily the right thing to do. It implies that they may be using their emotion to drive the conversation rather than looking at the facts and thinking about it logically. Someone may just be pushing too hard without even realizing it, and this phrase is just a polite way of suggesting that the person just take a look again at their idea and rein it in.
4. 'I'm sure there's value here, even if it's subtle'
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When an individual uses this phrase, they're expressing that there's nothing worthwhile in another person's work. The first part of the phrase shows that there's some kind of willingness to see that something meaningful exists in what they're talking about, but overall, there's just nothing of substance there.
It's a polite dismissal of what someone has to say in their work email, and implies that they might need to work a bit harder if they want others to understand them and their ideas. It acknowledges that they may have put effort in, but that effort is quite hard to see anyway. It's just simply not worth the time to try and dissect it, so as politely and civilly as possible, they're being pushed aside.
5. 'Let's keep refining until it finally clicks'
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When using this phrase in a work email, you're not only sounding a bit encouraging but you're also willing to collaborate with the other person to really refine the idea they may have. Hidden underneath the willingness to help and support, though, is the pointed remark that what they might've submitted or pitched just isn't really working at all.
"When feedback is interpreted as threatening to one's sense of self, it can result in feelings of shame and humiliation, defensiveness, and even aggressive behavior. This tends to occur when the feedback is perceived as a personal attack—as critical of one's character," explained health writer Arash Emamzadeh.
What makes this phrase a bit of a subtle insult is that you're not really stating what's actually wrong or pointing out any specific flaws, but instead, you're pointing out that the entire thing just isn't clicking. While you're not outright saying it's bad because it's still a work environment and you don't want to actually hurt the other person's feelings, you're pointing out that it's just not there yet.
In a workplace, this kind of feedback can end up pushing the other person to reevaluate what they've tried to make work and learn from it.
6. 'Per my previous email'
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Nothing carries as much weight as telling your colleague or boss that you've already explained the thing they're confused about in your last email. This is one of the more straightforward but subtle insults brilliant people slip into work emails with a smile, and is a way of reminding someone that you've already said this and you refuse to waste your breath by having to sit there and type it all up again in another email.
You're not being rude. You're just directing that person to reading again because it seems they may have missed the mark entirely. And according to a study from WordFinder by YourDictionary, researchers collected data to find the most-used passive-aggressive work phrases. Ranked on that list was, unsurprisingly, "per my last email," proving that most people are definitely using this phrase at work when they're just too frustrated.
You're maintaining your professionalism, but also quietly expressing how irritating it is that the other person didn't even take the time to read your previous email. You're also just subtly shaming the other person for clearly not being able to follow instructions or asking a question that's already been answered clearly and concisely.
7. 'I can see your point, even if I'm not totally sold'
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When someone uses this phrase in an email correspondence at work, they're validating that person's point while also admitting that there really isn't much to it. It's about expressing doubt that the idea or project the other person is talking about may not actually work, but leaving the impression that you're open to discussing it and maybe even workshopping it down the line, even if you're actually not interested in that at all.
But, of course, you can't necessarily say that, so you've opted for a subtler way of saying that their idea just hasn't landed in the way they probably wanted it to. This phrase also just does a good job of not inviting any unnecessary debate. You're simply telling it like it is and not sugarcoating things.
8. 'Not what I would have chosen, but it's your call'
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This phrase is a professional way of raising your eyebrows in disbelief but respectfully stepping back to let the other person take the reins. By saying that it's not something you would have chosen, you're expressing your disagreement and disapproval with the idea but you're also not being confrontational about it either. You're allowing the other person to see that their idea may not reap the benefits they think it will all on their own.
"We can either ignore the lessons hidden in the mistakes of others or recognize their value and choose a different path. By observing the consequences of their actions, we can gain valuable insights without having to endure the same hardships," pointed out clinical psychologist Robert Puff.
While the phrase may seem respectful on the surface, it does carry the weight of doubt, except you're not outright saying that at all. It's making it clear that you're not taking accountability for the fallout of it, and that you're clearly not on board at all. But, of course, you're keeping that professional decorum and allowing the other person to fully take the wheel.
9. 'This is definitely an unexpected angle'
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This phrase may seem like it's coming off as praise by pointing out the person may have taken an angle that no one else has braved to take. But in a professional setting, the "unexpected" part of it shows that maybe it was for good reason that no one else was thinking the same way they were.
An individual using this phrase is suggesting that the other person's idea may have been just a tad bit too unconventional and pokes at it without raising any sort of unnecessary conflict. You're not wanting to step on their toes, but you're also refusing to acknowledge or validate what they might've been trying to say over email.
10. 'Thanks for your unique perspective on this'
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Upon first glance, one of the subtle insults brilliant people slip into work emails with a smile can be read as a bit of compliment to someone's unique perspective. But underneath it, the person sending this in a work email doesn't actually think there's anything unique about that person's perspective.
It's just a polite way of saying that it was a bit of an off-base remark or idea that was pitched. Rather than completely shooting down the other person's perspective or even pointing out flaws, it simply labels the idea as a bit different, without actually attempting to unpack anything else.
Author and professor Anthony D. Fredericks explained that it's sometimes good to have bad ideas: "We often have this belief that when faced with a creative challenge, we need to generate a really good idea that will save the day (or ensure our continued employment). As a result, we focus on 'the perfect idea' or 'the best solution.'"
"That thinking perhaps does more to curtail creativity than anything else. While it may be a common focal point for a professional project, it significantly narrows our vision and sublimates our creative fires," he concluded
It's just a polite acknowledgement that the idea exists, but there's actually no plans on moving forward with it. In the workplace, you never want to actually shut down someone's ideas because it could end up causing them to never want to volunteer any new ones, but taking a diplomatic approach may just be the better choice.
11. 'This will take some work'
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While it may come across as a fair observation of someone's work, it also acknowledges that the rest of it is severely missing. Without being outright insulting and rude, typing this in an email to someone at work proves that they aren't all the way there yet with their ideas and they need to be fleshed out more.
You're not trying to come across as harsh, but you're also wanting to communicate that something is very much off, maybe even deeply flawed. You're not trying to trigger the other person to become defensive, but there's clearly room for a large amount of improvement and maybe even a couple more drafts before it's something that can be shared again.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
