11 Phrases That Make Highly Intelligent People Check Out Of Conversations Completely
Smart people know when it's time to walk away from disrespect.
DC Studio / Shutterstock Particular phrases can trigger strong reactions from others, depending on how they are received. Some people act out to express their disdain for what was said, but there are phrases that simply make highly intelligent people check out of conversations completely.
Two people might handle the same off-hand comments in very different ways. While a person who is of average intellect might engage in a debate around the offensive words, highly intellectual people who feel dismissed or judged know it's best for them to leave the table when respect is no longer being served.
Here are 11 phrases that make highly intelligent people check out of conversations completely
1. 'Calm down'
stagestock via Canva
If you've ever been in the middle of saying something you were extremely passionate about and someone interrupted to tell you to calm down, you know just how enraging that can be. It feels patronizing and dismissive of your emotions. It also insinuates that you are not calm, something you might disagree with.
Telling a person to calm down during an intense conversation can actually have the opposite impact. Things may instead escalate, showing you what it really means to not be calm. But if they happen to be a highly intelligent person, it's more likely that they will simply disengage. They don't have time to go back and forth with you and choose peace over winning a pointless argument.
2. 'Whatever'
Polina Zimmerman from Pexels
If there is one word that expresses a clear dismissal and disregard of what a person is saying, it's "whatever." When a person is sharing their thoughts and the person who is supposed to be listening responds in that way, it is a clear invalidation of what was said.
While someone who is not-so-smart might continue the conversation, intent on getting the other party to understand where they are coming from, a person of advanced intellect will recognize the writing on the wall. They understand that active listening is not going to happen in that moment and choose to exit stage left.
3. 'It is what it is'
Keira Burton from Pexels via Canva
When people attempt to end a discussion by saying, "It is what it is," it can be interpreted as giving up. They fully understand that valid points may have been made, but want to make it clear that they have no desire or intention of talking about the topic anymore or taking any related action.
People without the emotional intelligence to cut their losses will turn into Trevor Tryhard, attempting to convince the dismissive person that they should care more or work toward a resolution. The highly intelligent accept the outcome and don't waste their time beating a dead horse.
4. 'That’s nothing, you should hear what happened to me'
Liza Summer from Pexels via Canva
We all know that person you go to for advice or support at a difficult time who responds by dominating the interaction, telling you all of their woes. By the time you leave the conversation, your quest for guidance has turned into you counseling them and taking on even more emotional baggage.
People who don't know how to express that they are not being heard in a healthy way might lash out or continue to listen while seething just beneath the surface. Smart people use their words and their tact to let their friend know that they are not being listened to and that they need to respectfully end the conversation.
5. 'I told you so'
gabrielle cc from pixabay via Canva
Why is it that some people cannot resist the urge to prove they were right, even at the worst time? They may have advised you to leave your cheating boyfriend, but you stayed and forgave him. He cheats again, and you call them for consolation, but are met with a proud "I told you so," further adding to your sorrows.
When two average people are talking, this can easily escalate to throwing jabs and judgments back and forth. They can go down memory lane, recalling all of the bad decisions on both sides and imploding the friendship. High-level thinkers know they should remove themselves if they are not getting what they need from the person they've reached out to.
6. 'You always/You never'
Shotprime via Canva
Human beings are complex. No one does the same thing the same way every time. So when people accuse them of always doing something or never doing a particular thing, it comes off as an offensive blanket statement that could not possibly be true.
Lower-level thinkers will start sharing examples of times they did or did not do the thing in question in hopes of convincing the accuser otherwise. If you are one of the most superior thinkers, you see the comment as rhetorical and not worthy of addressing. You know that sometimes the best response is no response at all.
7. 'You sound stupid'
South_agency from Getty Images Signature via Canva
One of the most outright offensive phrases someone can say during a heated discussion is, "You sound stupid." Where most of us come from, those are fighting words. They make you feel belittled and as if your point of view is irrational.
Calling a person who does not have the skills to walk away from disrespect will certainly make them match energy, calling out your shortcomings, and saying hurtful things to one-up you. If a person is super smart, they do not tolerate disrespect at all. They don't even respond. They simply remove their presence.
8. 'Everything happens for a reason'
Keira Burton from Pexels via Canva
Though they mean well, people who tell you that everything happens for a reason can get on your last nerve, especially when you are dealing with tragedy or something they, themselves, have never handled. Those words alone can heighten emotions, making a less intelligent person unleash their pent-up feelings.
If you fall among the highly intelligent crowd, you don't take offense at the phrase because you look at the intention behind the words. Of course, in the worst of times, no one wants to hear that there was a valid reason for them losing a loved one or getting divorced. Quick-witted people see beneath the surface, knowing it's that thought that counts.
9. 'Look on the bright side'
RDNE Stock Project from Pexels via Canva
Another unintentionally offensive phrase that people tend to dish out in times of turmoil is, "Look on the bright side." It's easy to assume there is, in fact, a bright side when you are on the outside of the situation looking in, but those in the eye of the storm can see the darkness around them and don't see the silver lining.
People of great intellect, again, understand the underlying message. They know that this is an attempt to be supportive and uplift their spirits, and accept it as such. There might not be a bright side at the moment, but the wise ones know that life is cyclical and there will be sunshine after the rain.
10. 'Let's circle back'
Mizuno K from Pexels via Canva
You head into a meeting desperate to get the answers you need from a colleague. They've had all week to prepare an appropriate response, but when asked, they simply say, "Let's circle back." This response can feel evasive or noncommittal. Many see it as an indicator that the person did not attempt to show up with the expected resolutions.
Astute people don't take this personally. They know how to follow up diplomatically and choose not to belabor the point, especially if others are in attendance. At the same time, they continue to hold the responsible party accountable for any outstanding deliverables and have no problem expressing concern when they are not met.
11. 'Per my last email'
WICHAYADA SUWANNACHUN's Images via Canva
Anyone who has worked in a professional environment knows that "per my last email' is an indicator of a passive-aggressive sender. They want you to know that they did their part, but you either can't read or chose not to take the required action. It's a reminder that you have failed to respond or follow up appropriately.
As highly intelligent people, we see right through this and de-escalate by staying calm and out of our feelings. Though we recognize the slight, we also take accountability for any misses or delays on our part. We know that you can't humble a person that already has exceptional humility, so we choose to be the bigger person and only send back what is necessary, respectful, and productive.
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, and the author of seven books. She focuses on lifestyle and human interest stories that delivers informative and actionable guidance on interpersonal relationships, enlightenment, and self-discovery.
