This Is What Anal Sex REALLY Feels Like For A Woman (Hint: Ouch)

Intense is an understatement.

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"It felt like I was going to sh*t all over his dick," my college roommate told me after she had anal sex for the first time. "So I started to cry because I was scared he'd break up with me if I did sh*t on his dick."

It was one of those moments that you never quite forget, especially since, at least back then, the idea of women having butt sex was pretty effing foreign to me. I didn't even ask her why she tried it, because I didn't want to know. I had already decided that anal sex was not in my future. Ever.

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Fast forward a few years. My first love and I were mid-sex, when he popped the big question: "Do you want to try anal?" Before I could answer, he was already listing off his friends whose girlfriends really loved it.


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"One of them actually prefers it in the ass now," he said. I was skeptical. But I was also in love. So I gave butt sex a try that night sans lube, sans relaxation, sans everything that's quite necessary to make anal even remotely pleasurable and not only did it hurt like f*ck, but, yes, it felt like I was taking a sh*t. I also, in the days that followed, couldn't poop regularly or without pain. TMI? Sorry not sorry; deal with it.

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We would go on to try it a couple more times, still completely unprepared in our attempts, and each time I tried, for the sake of my first love, to love it. But I couldn't. I loved the taboo factor of it, but the actual sex act and how it felt was awful.

I stayed away from it for a long time, even when it was brought up by other lovers or people I dated. Then I fell in love again and we did it right.

If you have butt sex correctly, it can feel pretty damn good. When I say "correctly," I mean there's lube involved (lots of it) and maybe even a glass of wine so those sphincter muscles aren't clenched and silently screaming, "DO NOT ENTER HERE." It definitely involves a lot more preparation than vaginal sex, that's for sure.

So, what does anal sex feel like for a girl? One word: Intense.

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Without lube it feels like the walls of your anal cavity are being sort of scraped. Not scraped in high-pitched, finger nails on a chalkboard sort of way, but scraped in a not-so-pleasant pressure type of way. And yes, it definitely feels like you're about to poop, or maybe you did just poop, or that the poop is crawling back up inside you. Fun, right?

But if you can relax those muscles, you'll experience a deeper sensation than you would via vaginal sex. The tightness makes it so you feel every inch of your partner's penis as he thrusts in and out. EVERY INCH. You don't get that experience with vaginal sex.

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Vaginally, you know his penis is in, is deeper, and oh, wow, now he's as deep as possible, but anal sex turns on every nerve down there. It's as if the nerves have been awakened, so they embrace the penetration with open arms, so to speak, and the intensity if felt in all corners of your body.

Actual physical feeling aside, the taboo element of it although, butt sex is pretty mainstream these days adds a whole other level to it. I mean, you're being f*cked in the ass, after all. Things are tight, could possibly get messy, and it feels overwhelming, as if you're engulfing him in a way that your vagina cannot, which adds to the intimacy factor.

Honestly, most of us don't have anal sex with just anyone; it's something you work up to when trust has been established.

Which brings us to this: Should you try butt sex? Well, if you want to, then by all means. Exploring your sexuality is never a bad idea and you don't know what you just might love, or even hate, until you give it a try.

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Just remember lube is your friend on this one. Unless, of course, you like the sensation of feeling like your anal cavity walls are being scraped and pounded and not the good kind of pounding. The good kind of pounding comes when lube is part of the equation; I can't emphasize that enough.

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