The Art Of Hope: 7 Ways To Stay Grounded And Real When Everything In The World Feels Awful
How to care and cope at the same time.
Aliya Sam | Unsplash In life, I strive to be an optimistic person, although, I think I end up somewhere in the middle between being an optimist and a pessimist. This middle area I like to refer to as "being a realist." Overall, I'm basically fine with being a realist because it keeps me grounded. The problem, though, with being a realist is that there is little room left if I want to make a change to the events in the world.
Optimists see potential to change things for the better, while the realist simply sees what is. The optimist in us wants to join the thoughts and conversation with our inner realist. (As I previously said, I do try my best to be an optimist.) But even if the realist allows such a dialogue, what might it sound like? In light of the tensions in the world, what can our inner optimist say without sounding either naive or like a quote from a greeting card?
How can we be realistic and optimistic? Because I think most of us would like to be both. The optimist views the world from the mindset that every challenge can be overcome, and believes peace and joy always prevail.
Even if we can't fully imagine how that might be true, optimism motivates us to strive for it anyway. Because we know, without at least trying, a future full of hope will never be realized. The joint dialogue of the optimist with the realist must take into account the difficult realities we face and avoid naive "answers."
Here are seven ways to stay grounded and real when everything in the world feels awful:
1. Remember, you're not alone
PeopleImages / Shutterstock
The daunting task of coping with a world in turmoil is not yours nor mine to struggle with by ourselves. Seek out others who feel the same as you and, instead of complaining or despairing, work together on practical solutions to the problems.
The stress-buffering hypothesis suggests that social support helps mitigate the negative impact of stressful life events. When you perceive that support is available, it can change your appraisal of a stressful situation, making it seem less threatening or overwhelming.
2. Refuse to be a victim
Mix and Match Studio / Shutterstock
A victim is a person who suffers as a result of events happening to them that they can't control. You may say that, according to that definition, we are victims of what's happening in the world. But, if we change our perspective on how we define "world," not meaning the entire globe, rather, defining my world as consisting of my local community, we can create reasonable expectations.
Creating reasonable expectations allows us to actually do something to affect change. For example, it is unreasonable to make our personal goal that of world peace. However, creating a peaceful home, work, or local community is a reasonable personal goal.
3. Empower yourself and others
PeopleImages / Shutterstock
Educate yourself about the struggles we're facing (from all points of view) and solutions tried in the past. Learn what worked and what didn't work, figuring out why it didn't work and what you can do differently now to make positive change more likely. Seek out and obtain the resources needed to carry out your goal.
Our ability to work with others to find a solution to shared problems removes the label of "victim," replacing it with "survivor." Although we need educate ourselves about the issues, it's also important to keep a balance, allowing for some news-free periods.
Empowerment cultivates a strong sense of personal agency, a belief in your ability to control your life and influence outcomes. Research has revealed that this enhances resilience by changing how you view and respond to challenges.
4. Reclaim your power
Antonio Guillem / Shutterstock
Once we realize that we are not powerless, our desire to implement change brings about renewed strength and optimism. Recognize the power and strength that you individually have, and that we as a group have, and find creative ways of using your power for the common good.
Do not let the power itself take over. Even if we feel invincible, in reality, we won't always make the proper decisions. Learning from our mistakes is a sign of strength, for the knowledge gained from the mistake will help you to avoid that, or similar mistakes in the future.
5. Focus your effort and energy
Krakenimages.com / Shutterstock
As I previously mentioned, our power and abilities are limited, so wisely focus your time and energy on those tasks that can be completed, and not on tasks you know are impossible for you to complete. No one person, or one group, can do everything.
One study argued that focusing your effort and energy through practices like mindfulness and grounding is key to remaining centered and reducing distress. By shifting attention away from anxious thoughts and engaging with the present moment, you can regulate emotions, decrease stress, and foster a sense of control.
6. Show empathy for others
Pixel-Shot / Shutterstock
As we learn about the issues affecting our world, we begin to realize that many of our problems originate with people not understanding each other. We tend to view the world from our own perspective and validating our own history, failing to recognize that those with whom we may disagree also view their world from their perspective and history.
Finding solutions to problems presupposes that all parties agree on the nature of the problem. Empathy, placing ourselves in the shoes of another, provides us a deeper understanding of the concerns of others. By viewing the world through their eyes, we become better informed and thereby better prepared to find and carry out real solutions. Empathy does not mean agreeing with another's opinion. It simply means you see their perspective as they view it.
7. Don't forget self-care
Prostock-studio / Shutterstock
The realist in me recognizes that to accomplish all of this, I will end up draining and wearing myself out. But in the union of the realist with the optimist, I recognize the need for self-care. Take time for yourself; keep up bonds with your family and friends; find activities or hobbies that do not relate to the work at hand; spend time in meditation and quiet to focus yourself.
Consistently prioritizing self-care sends a message to yourself that you are worthy of time and attention. One study suggested that this boosts self-esteem and self-worth, which are often negatively impacted by mental illness and stress
Obviously, I do not propose these steps as absolute solutions to the problems of the world. But I do offer them as guides to keep us grounded in reality and keep us hopeful and passionate enough to make a lasting difference.
Christopher Shea is an author, speaker, educator, life coach, and counselor at Lifesjourney Life Coaching, LLC. He has been featured in the New York Times, BBC Worldwide, The Takeaway, Spirit of Recovery, and more.
