5 Habits Of Sociopathic Men Who Think They’re Smarter Than Everyone Else, According To Psychology
Some men mask manipulation with confidence.
luxstorm | Canva Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the excitement of something new, we lose sight of what’s best and healthy for our lives. This can mean overdoing it with an exercise regimen or diet, it can mean missing important details about a new job, and it can most certainly relate to our relationships. The lure and sparkle of a partnership can blind us to areas of incompatibility or relationship red flags.
While personality quirks or bad habits can be overlooked or change over time, some red flags should not be ignored as they might be indicative of more serious — even sociopathic — concerns. Relationships can make us want to explain away or even deny uneasy feelings, but these red flags should never be ignored.
Here are 5 habits of sociopathic men who think they’re smarter than everyone else, according to psychology:
1. He's quick to become angry, yell, or throw things
Everyone gets angry sometimes; it’s the frequency and severity of your partner’s reactions that should act as a guide for your concerns. Expressing anger, even by yelling, can release tension, frustration, and pain — if done safely, but it should not be used as a method of control in any situation.
Using anger to instill fear in another is unacceptable behavior in any relationship. Pay attention to the direction your partner’s anger is directed.
Are you the recipient of a barrage of nasty words? Are you expected to absorb the negativity, even if you had nothing to do with the situation? Are you often blamed for your partner’s horrible mood? Does your body ever register fear when your partner erupts?
If you are answering ‘yes’ to any of these questions, you may need to take a step back from the situation to observe your partner’s patterns. Objectively witness. Look for common triggers and consistent reactions.
Bring the issue to light through calm, assertive conversations when you’re both in a good mood and see if the issue can be remedied. If you discover it can not, removing yourself from the relationship may be the best thing for your mental and spiritual well-being, as well as your physical safety.
2. He shows signs of secretive behaviors or excessive lying
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Fact: you can not have a healthy relationship without honesty. This is a non-negotiable component of a strong partnership. If your partner seems as if they’re up to no good, they very well might be.
If your partner seems to keep you compartmentalized from certain areas of their life, this might be a red flag for dishonesty. Similarly, if, on a regular basis, your partner refuses to discuss other aspects of their day, keeping details of his or her whereabouts or activities from you, this could be indicative of a greater problem.
If they are unwilling to share even the most benign details of their life with you, how are you to connect on a more intimate level? Not to mention, what exactly are they hiding?
Now, there is a difference between being a private person and being secretive. Perhaps your partner likes to have an hour or two of quiet after work; maybe texts coming or going late at night aren’t appreciated — these might be signs of a person who prioritizes time alone rather than a person who’s living a double life.
According to a 2023 study, a sociopathic liar uses deceit to manipulate and exploit others for their own personal gain or pleasure, without any sense of remorse or guilt. When confronted with lies, they may become defensive, turn the tables on their partner, and gaslight them into questioning their own sanity.
3. He shows drastic, sudden changes in behavior and/or mood
Maybe you found a relationship that worked in all the right ways: the two of you are compatible, have a strong network of friends, and genuinely enjoy each other’s company. Life (and love) is good.
If all of this feel-goodness seems to vaporize overnight, you have a red flag on your hands.
There are 100 reasons your partner’s persona can shift, even dramatically. Before diving into the bottomless pool of worst-case scenarios, decide if an event has flipped their world upside-down. Did your partner lose a job recently?
Is there an illness in the family or a sudden, tragic event that may have spun their insides into a knot of stress? Trauma — in any form — can do crazy things to our sense of well-being, so it’s best to tread lightly while you figure out the source.
If all the not-so-horrific scenarios are ruled out, listen to your gut. Is cheating a possibility? Are there other warning signs of unfaithfulness accompanying her sudden mood changes?
Again, shifts in mood can mean many things, but they’re undoubtedly a red flag for a bigger problem.
Drastic, sudden changes in a partner's behavior and mood are often signs of an underlying issue. While long-term personality development is normal, an abrupt and unexplained shift is a cause for concern. Research recommends calmly discussing concerns with the partner without being accusatory.
4. He shows signs of extreme, possessive behavior
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There is such thing as taking a healthy interest in your partner’s life. Whether you live together or not, basic “how was your day,” “what did you do today” conversation is perfectly normal and expected.
If your partner’s interest in your day-to-day activities seems a little much, it may be cause for concern.
Some of the earliest red flags of an abusive relationship begin with seemingly harmless questions. If your partner’s gentle “how was your day” turns to much more invasive questions like “who were you with” or “what time did you go to the store/what time did you leave the store,” he may be exhibiting overly-possessive behaviors.
If these types of interactions are coupled with an over-commitment to knowing your whereabouts — they check up on you at work, arrives unannounced to wherever you are, calls or texts excessively, guilts you into staying home, isolates you from friends or family — you may be putting yourself in a dangerous situation and should reach out to a trusted friend, family member or, if you feel your safety is in jeopardy, the Victim’s Resource Center.
This behavior involves a range of controlling and dominating tactics that can escalate into emotional or physical abuse. One study argued that possessive behavior violates trust and undermines your individuality, leading to a loss of personal freedom and identity.
5. He doesn’t say 'I’m sorry'
While this may not seem like as big a deal as the previous red flags, the inability to say “I’m sorry” to a partner can have far-reaching repercussions. If your partner refuses to apologize when he or she has done something wrong, this is a red flag for a perception of inequality in the relationship.
This inequality can be interpreted in two ways; however, your task will be to uncover the ‘why’ before you can address the issue.
In the first scenario, an inability to say “I’m sorry” can be a way for your partner to project dominance or superiority in the relationship. When faced with a problem, your partner will unload responsibility to anyone other than himself or herself.
They’ll talk around the issue instead of addressing it in a direct manner. They storm off to avoid confrontation, only to return later as if nothing happened.
These are all red flags, and by accepting this behavior, you send the message that this is acceptable, that you don’t deserve honesty, and that you are not equals in the partnership.
In the second scenario, I speak from experience; there are times when an apology has deep, nasty roots of inadequacy. Apologies are an admission of guilt, which is essentially saying, “I’m not perfect.”
None of us is perfect, it’s true, but to expose yourself in such a way with the one you love leaves you vulnerable to criticism or rejection.
It wasn’t until my partner brought my conspicuously absent apologies to my attention that I even recognized the problem. After many (many) conversations and a whole lot of practice, I’ve learned to apologize when I’m in the wrong — even when it hurts.
If you think you may be experiencing depression or anxiety as a result of ongoing emotional abuse at the hands of a narcissist, you are not alone. Domestic abuse can happen to anyone and is not a reflection of who you are or anything you've done wrong.
If you feel as though you may be in danger, there is support available 24/7/365 through the National Domestic Violence Hotline by calling 1-800-799-7233. If you’re unable to speak safely, text LOVEIS to 1-866-331-9474.
Sara Crolick is a freelance writer and contributor to The Good Men Project and MeetMindful.
