How People In Their 30s Love Differently Than Those In Their 20s, Especially In 8 Unique Areas

Last updated on Dec 05, 2025

Young couple enjoying a sunset picnic by an old-fashioned car showing how people in their thirties love differently than those in their twenties. Zoran Zeremski | Shutterstock
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Things are different in your 30s. If you're a twenty-something, that might be hard to imagine from where you're standing. But think about what you wanted out of life ten years ago. Was it absolutely ridiculous? This is especially true when it comes to love. 

Thirty years old versus twenty is like twenty versus 10: to a person in their 30s, a twenty-something is essentially a child.

I'm going to take a wild guess that what you wanted out of a relationship when you were 10 was entirely informed by Disney movies. Do you still see Beauty and the Beast as a sweet, romantic story, or the creepy tale of Stockholm Syndrome that it actually is?

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How will your perspective on love change in 10 more years?

People in their 30s love differently than those in their 20s, especially in 8 areas:

1. What they do for fun

20s: You want someone to go to the movies with.

30s: You want someone who will pause Netflix when you pass out, instead of letting it run through three more episodes.

2. What they consider romantic 

20s: You want to have a romantic, candlelight dinner.

30s: You want someone who's not ashamed to eat Chinese in your sweatpants 4 nights in a row, and will tell no one exactly how sloppy you get. 

RELATED: People Who Start Going To Bed Earlier As They Get Older Usually Fear These 11 Things Most

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3. What they want in bed 

20s: You want someone who will rock your world in the bedroom all night long.

30s: You want someone who will just hurry up and do that thing you like already, because we have work in the morning. Even when it happens quickly, it's better than any long, drawn-out romantic movie scene. Because they know you.  

4. What's fun during intimate moments

20s: You want someone who holds your hand as you walk down the street together.

30s: You want someone who's secure enough to hold your purse when you go into the restroom or need to take a work call when you're out and about. 

5. What lights them up inside

20s: You want someone who gives you butterflies in your stomach when you lock eyes with them.

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30s: You want someone who gets butterflies along with you when the appetizers arrive at the table.

RELATED: People Who Keep The Same Décor For 20 Years Usually Have These 11 Deep Reasons

6. What looks good to them 

20s: You want someone to get all dolled up for. Someone who layers on the cologne or perfume and wears their hair perfect. 

30s: You want someone who will accept the fact you're not going to be dolled up 98 percent of the time. Someone who knows you love them even when they're a mess. 

7. What they need when times are tough 

20s: You want someone to lean on when you're upset.

30s: You want someone who, in the same situation, will simply pour your favorite drink, put on your favorite show. They'll silently watch beside you or go in another room. Your choice. 

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8. Their outlook on life 

20s: You want someone to travel the world and go on adventures with.

30s: You want someone who can turn people-watching at Walmart into a grand adventure. Someone who can play cards with you in pajamas, eat ice cream out of the carton with a spoon and watch the game in the background. 

No matter what, it's always you two against the world. And that's the kind of love that can carry you from your 30s into your 40s and 50s... and beyond. Together. 

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RELATED: Wives Who Don't Want Intimacy Anymore Usually Give These 11 'Nice' Excuses

Bob Alaburda is a senior editor at dvm360. His work has appeared in the Huffington Post, Ravishly, and more.

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