Photo: TikTok
A lot of these "beige flag" trends turn out to be red flags in disguise — but this one is as plain as day.
By Isaac Serna-Diez — Written on Jun 05, 2023
A woman on TikTok made a post that joins the ongoing trend of calling out “beige flags” with this post being about something that her boyfriend does that gives her “second-hand embarrassment.”
“Beige flags” are part of a current social media trend where people try to find unique quirks in people that are neither green flags nor red flags, however, everyone was in agreement that this was definitely not a beige flag, but a red one.
Her boyfriend gets so impatient that he helps waitresses serve food at restaurants.
The woman, whose name is Zoe (@zoefried_), made the post on TikTok about a week ago with the caption “I have severe secondhand embarrassment” alongside a hashtag that read “#beigeflag.” I also have severe second-hand embarrassment, but this encounter would be categorized as disappointment and disgust.
“My boyfriend’s beige flag is that he gets impatient at restaurants and helps the waitress bring the plates to our table,” reads the overlaid text in the short, 5-second clip. In the clip, we share the perspective of Zoe sitting at her table watching her boyfriend bring over a plate of food before sitting down.
If this is a beige flag, what does it take to be red? Does he need to go into the kitchen and cook the food himself because he can’t wait long enough? The problem is that no one thinks this is an actual “beige flag” — all the comments are screaming red.
“I’ve never seen a bigger red flag than this,” one of the comments on her TikTok read, “This is a screaming red flag,” read another comment. A third person wrote “When you’re wearing rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like [beige] flags,” making a joke that she’s just trying to find something good about him, but she seems to be doing just fine.
She’s replied to some of the comments on the post but hasn’t made any comment on whether or not she really thinks there’s nothing wrong with this.
You can tell a lot about a person’s character based on how they treat wait staff.
Judging how someone reacts to or treats wait staff at a restaurant is widely regarded as one of the best methods for figuring a person out — dubbed as, “The Waiter Rule.” YourTango expert Susan Kulakowski told us back in December 2022 that one of the biggest red flags that more people should watch out for is rudeness to wait staff.
“Rudeness to service people — cashiers, clerks, wait staff, et al. Doesn’t matter how much they ‘deserve’ it,” is one of the top red flags that a person can show off.
It’s really as simple as following the golden rule — you know the one. “Treat others the way you want to be treated?” That one. If someone treats their waiter rudely or with an air of superiority simply because they’re supposed to be providing a service, that’s a red flag.
Waiting for your food isn’t that hard, and letting your waiter do their job is even easier. Be nice to your servers, and if you find your partner doing something like this during a date, run for the hills.
Isaac Serna-Diez is an Assistant Editor who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics.