Women Who Don't Chase Anyone's Attention Almost Always Say These 11 High-Value Phrases When They Talk To Men
MAD_Production | Shutterstock When a woman is high-value, it means she has high standards for the way a partner treats her. But that doesn't mean she doesn't crave connection. Because no matter how independent she may be, it's normal to want a genuine and meaningful partnership. While her actions may indicate what she will and won't tolerate, so do her words, and women who don't chase anyone's attention almost always say certain high-value phrases when they talk to men.
A woman like this doesn't have a goal of being rude or egotistical; in fact, when she speaks to men, she has no intention of shutting them down. Instead, she wants to make it clear that she has specific expectations, and if they can't meet them, they aren't a match. She knows her worth, after all.
Women who don't chase anyone's attention almost always say these 11 high-value phrases when they talk to men
1. ‘I’m not interested in that’
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When a woman uses this phrase, she isn't trying to be rude or disrespectful. Having done the inner work to reverse her people-pleasing tendencies, she'd rather be upfront with a man than lie to him about what she likes. It might feel a bit jarring, but honesty is something that seems to be lacking when dating.
Women struggle the most with people-pleasing tendencies compared to men. According to a YouGov survey, "Women (56%) are more likely than men (42%) to say they would describe themselves this way." So, while it may be shocking to hear a woman truly advocate for herself, men shouldn't be put off.
2. ‘I enjoy my own company’
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The loneliness epidemic continues to affect many people from all walks of life. Between failed first dates and finding it harder to mingle face to face, with loneliness comes things like depression and anxiety. Outside of relationships, the average person needs other social connections, like family and friends, to truly keep them grounded and sane.
It's not to say that they don't have friends or close family, but a woman is letting a potential man know that she's more than happy to be single when using this high-value phrase. Would it be nice to find genuine love? Of course. But when push comes to shove, she loves herself enough to stay within her own company if it means keeping her peace.
3. ‘That doesn’t work for me’
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Whether it's "that doesn't work for me" or simply "no thank you," women who don't chase anyone's attention almost always say these high-value phrases when they talk to men. Especially as it pertains to her time, she remains in control of it, and doesn't let any man waste hers.
Her goal isn't to hurt or be an inconvenience to others; however, if something truly doesn't work for her, she won't force herself to go along with it. It may frustrate some men, but as licensed psychologist Jordan Fiorillo Scotti pointed out, because boundaries protect and nourish us, setting and holding strong ones help us create the life we really want, instead of one we want to escape from.
4. ‘I’ll get back to you on that’
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It's tempting to want to give a straightaway response when another person demands it. Never wanting to inconvenience someone or keep them waiting, many would rather push past their uncertainty than risk upsetting someone they care for or are interested in. But for women who don't chase anyone, they use this phrase when speaking to men.
It might not be the most ideal response a man was hoping for, but women would rather think things through than risk changing their minds and getting his hopes up. While it's slightly frustrating, men should take it as a green flag, because a person who is decisive and careful is someone who makes a great partner.
5. ‘I’m looking for something meaningful’
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Today, meeting on dating apps is very normal, but it's hard to know what someone truly wants when they first begin talking. Even on a first date, they may hide their true feelings and desires, opting instead for a more sugarcoated version of themselves. But for women who don't chase anyone, they use this phrase to be upfront and honest.
Wanting to lay all her cards on the table, she lets a man know right away what she's looking for. As professor at the Stanford School of Engineering, Tina Seelig, pointed out, "Time is the great equalizer. Each day has only 24 hours — nobody has any more than anyone else. Everyone, from poets to presidents, fills those hours, one after the other, until they are all filled up. Every single minute is unique, and once gone, can never be regained."
6. ‘I’m happy with or without a relationship’
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Everyone wants to find their soulmate. Perhaps they watched a lot of rom-coms growing up, so it's normal to want to find a happily ever after. But it's equally important to find someone who's on the same wavelength. So, whether it's "I'm secure in my own skin, single or not" or "I'm happy with or without a relationship," women who don't chase anyone's attention almost always say these high-value phrases when they talk to men.
Some men may interpret this as being rude, but she's just being honest. While she may think a man is great, she refuses to tie her self-worth to another person. So, she makes it clear that she's content either way. Wanting to let a man know that her priority is herself and her mental health, she's not afraid to be blunt.
7. ‘I’m not in a rush’
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Sometimes, it's easy to feel as if a person is falling behind in life. They may have every milestone planned out, and when things don't go their way, they scramble to get back on track. But women who refuse to chase anyone aren't in a rush, because they know finding the right person for them takes time and dedication.
As clinical psychologist and marriage counselor Randi Gunther explained, "Entering a new relationship with clarity and self-confidence, you will automatically be able to discern early-on whether a potential partner is worth your investment... Your reasons for entering that unknown culture are the desire to fully experience, to learn, and to grow. You can't do that if you are too concerned as to whether the relationship will be temporary or permanent."
8. ‘I don’t do mixed signals’
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It's never easy to tell what someone is thinking. Especially if a person is getting to know someone new, discerning how they're feeling with simple body language isn't as easy as some think. But when entering a relationship, certain women prefer to have all their cards on the table, and make it known that they won't put up with mixed signals.
She's not saying this with the intention of calling anyone out. Wanting transparency and honesty, she'd rather let a man know where her needs are than fake it the whole way.
9. ‘I don’t do last-minute plans’
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Everyone's been in a situation before where plans change at the last moment. For some women, rather than readily agree, they won't go out of their way to appease someone else's time frame. She isn't meeting up with a man at the last minute and rearranging her schedule. If she already committed, she'd rather stick to it than cancel.
A person's ability to remain consistent is crucial. According to a study published in Social Cognition, reversing a bad first impression is difficult and takes weeks longer than making a first good impression. Not wanting to mess up her reputation, she'll let a man know right off the bat that won't be taking a last-minute request in this way.
10. ‘I’m big on respect’
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While respect is the basis of any healthy relationship or interaction, too many people push boundaries and try to gaslight others into submission. But when a woman says this high-value phrase, she's setting a boundary and letting it be known that she won't tolerate anything less than respectful behavior.
While she may not outright tell a man "If you don't respect me, I'm leaving," it's clear this is a warning for any future interactions. If a man isn't able to control himself or keep things cordial, don't expect a woman to stick around for long.
11. ‘I’ll message you after’
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On the surface, it may sound slightly cold to utter this phrase. For some men, it may even sound like she's not interested. But, arguably, one of the most respectful things someone can do is to be clear and direct with their communication.
She may not text back for days or update him on her life, but if she truly likes a guy, she's quick to be transparent about her schedule. And while it may not feel great in the moment, a little distance isn't always a bad thing. According to social psychologist Theresa E. DiDonato, "Interestingly, though, the more men text with a partner, the less happy they tend to be, the less happy their romantic partners tend to be, and the more their partners tend to report considering breaking up with them."
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who writes about self-help, relationships, careers, family, and astrology.
