10 Signs He's A Genuinely Good Guy (And Not A Jerk)

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good guy smiling at the camera

A genuinely good guy is a man with a kind heart. He aims to treat others the way he wants to be treated. His kindness truly comes from him just wanting to be nice for the sake of it. He doesn't solely do nice things for his own benefit or attention.

But read any dating advice and there's one thing that's true: it can be hard to tell the difference between a guy who is genuinely nice, and one who is pretending to get what he wants from you.

The major tell that he’s a jerk pretending to be nice is that he’s always telling you he’s a nice guy. Guys who are the self-proclaimed "nice guy" are hardly ever acting this way for the right reasons. His intent is to alter your impression of him so he can easily manipulate you.

He wants you to take his word, even if his actions don’t add up. Fake "good guys" want to get away with as many things as they can, so if you catch him doing something he shouldn’t, he’ll use being nice as a pass.

When he does something good for you, he expects you to acknowledge it. He might even try to encourage you to go on a date with him, simply because he’s a "nice guy." But he's using this title to get what he wants!

A genuinely good guy, however, doesn’t have to tell you he’s nice — he shows it.

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He knows that his actions speak louder than words. As opposed to saying it, he shows you, but not out of the need to prove himself. It’s just who he is.

Unsure if the guy you're seeing is a "nice guy" or a genuinely nice guy? Here are some signs he may just be the guy you're looking for.

10 signs he's genuinely a good guy

1. He's respectful.

If he’s truly nice he’ll respect you. He respects you because, like him, you’re a person! And you deserve to be treated as such. A nice guy’s courtesy speaks volumes about the authenticity of his niceness.

2. He can take no for an answer.

Real nice guys don’t try to manipulate you into saying yes. If you decline or reject their offer, they respectfully accept your decision. He isn’t going to make you feel bad for being honest, and he’s not going to change your mind.

A fake nice guy might try to convince you to change your mind, and if you don’t, he might end up insulting you as a result of being rejected. Genuine nice guys can take rejection without being jerks.

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3. He's patient.

Nice guys are patient. He understands that everyone matures and progresses at different rates as individuals and with a relationship. He isn't going to pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to.

He's also more than willing to go at your pace because guys who are authentically nice want you to be comfortable. A nice guy wants to know that you’re ready for the next step and aren’t being pressured into it.

4. He doesn't blame others for his failures.

Just like jerks, nice guys make mistakes. The difference between a jerk making a mistake and a nice guy making one is that nice guys own up to their mistakes.

They don’t try to pin the blame on others. He takes accountability for his actions!

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5. He thinks before he acts.

Good guys actually think things through. They know that the smallest actions can have very real consequences, so before they act, they think.

They don’t want to hurt others with their actions, so they take the time to think about what they’re about to do, all to prevent having to apologize after the fact.

6. He doesn’t expect compliments.

Nice guys don’t operate out of the need for validation. He's nice because he wants to be, not in hopes of getting acknowledged. He doesn't feel entitled to get compliments because of his good deeds.

He’ll gladly appreciate compliments, but complimenting him isn't mandatory. He won’t tell you about something he’s done just to get a compliment.

7. He's kind to others and does things for strangers or those less fortunate.

It’s really easy to be nice to people you know. To truly see if someone is a nice person, you have to see how they treat other people they don't know.

Genuinely nice guys will be respectful to the less fortunate, servers, and other staff members. Nice guys don’t see themselves as too good to be kind to anyone.

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8. He's forgiving.

His awareness of his own tendencies to make mistakes makes it easier for him to forgive the mistakes of others. Nice guys know that holding grudges doesn't benefit them or anyone else, so they forgive and move on.

9. He accepts others for who they are.

One of the reasons a good guy is able to be nice to others is because of his acceptance of people he doesn't relate to. He doesn't try to change people. He loves and appreciates them for who they are, instead.

10. He's reliable.

He will not flake on you. He will tell you in advance that he won’t be able to make plans. When he does, he might even reschedule. He knows it’s rude to have someone waiting for a long time and not show up.

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Tamara Sanon is a writer with a passion for covering topics about health and wellness, lifestyle, astrology, and relationships.