If A Man Truly Loves You From The Core Of His Soul, He Will Do These 16 Things On A Regular Basis
Men who are head-over-heels for someone love their partner in these ways.
Cody Scott | Unsplash "Acts of service" is one of the most straightforward love languages. Basically, a man who wants his partner to feel loved through acts of service just needs to do things, anything, without being asked.
These regular expressions of love become like emotional anchors in your relationship. If a man truly loves you, he will display these dependable reminders of just how deeply you're valued and cherished. They're the quiet confirmation that what you share is something truly special and enduring.
If a man truly loves you from the core of his soul, he will do these 17 things regularly:
1. Do a chore you don't want to do
Who wouldn’t like a chore done for them that they don’t like to do? I am guessing that your partner does lots of those chores for you every day. Think laundry, cooking, and housekeeping?
What kind of chores does your partner hate to do? Perhaps getting their oil changed, taking out the garbage, cleaning out the basement, grocery shopping, or some of the other tasks listed below. If you can make it so that your partner doesn’t have to do the thing that they dread doing, they will definitely feel loved.
2. Plan the dinner menu
insta_photos / Shutterstock
If there is one thing that most women dislike doing every single night, it’s planning a meal. To choose what is going to be served for dinner. The cooking part isn’t so bad, but the planning is a time-suck.
An excellent act of service is to tell your partner that you will plan dinner for a week. If you can follow through and cook it too, you will get bonus points.
Research by renowned American psychologist Dr. John Gottman has extensively studied bids for connection and care-taking behaviors. Partners who consistently respond to each other's needs and preferences have significantly stronger relationship satisfaction and longevity.
3. Give you a massage
I know that you might think that you don’t know how to do this one, but I can promise you that you can. You probably are intimate with your partner regularly and know their body better than anyone.
And, really, it’s not about technique, it’s about intention. If you crawl into bed next to your partner and offer to rub their back, just the act of doing it will mean the world to them, no matter what the quality.
4. Plan a surprise night out or a vacation
Again, women spend much of their lives planning. Dinners, dates, vacations, etc. — the planning gets old. If you want to make your partner feel loved, take over the planning for date night. Even better, plan it for a night that isn’t usually a date night.
If you have a vacation planned, offer to take over the details so that they can just sit back and enjoy. The cherry on top will be how creative you can be. Don’t do the same old thing. Find something new that you haven’t done before.
Do something that you know they love to do but haven’t done for a while. Do something that they know you might not want to do, but will do it anyway. Your partner will love you for it.
5. Clean the house
This is a scary one, for many reasons. The first is that you probably don’t want to clean the house, and the prospect of doing so fills you with dread.
The second is that you are worried that you won’t do it the way that they want you to do it. But know that if you clean the house without being asked, your partner will absolutely love you for it, even if your technique is different from theirs.
6. Make your coffee
Mornings are hard. Making coffee to get those mornings started can be challenging.
Imagine how good your partner would feel if you brought them some coffee in bed. Even better, if you brought some for yourself, you shared a few quiet minutes before the chaos of the day began.
7. Walk the dog
Of course, we all love our dogs madly, but sometimes walking them is a pain. And I am guessing that if the dog is theirs, you are less likely to take on that chore for them.
Do it. Get that dog out of the house for them. After all, a tired dog is a good dog, and that will take a load off their shoulders.
Research on relationship investment suggests that when people take on tasks that require time, effort, and consistency, it demonstrates genuine care and investment in the relationship. This type of consistent, unglamorous responsibility-taking often indicates deeper commitment than grand romantic gestures.
8. Wash the dishes
My boyfriend is 100 percent in charge of washing the dishes in our house. He took it over when we first got together (mostly, I think, because I am bad at it).
It is a lovely thing to walk by a sink full of dishes, knowing that, when he gets home from work, he will deal with it and happily so. So, if your partner's love language is the act of service, washing the dishes is an excellent activity to take on.
9. Let you choose the movie
Miljan Zivkovic / Shutterstock
I know — this one might fill you with dread.
I mean, you know that chances are 100 percent that if you let them choose the movie, you will be made to watch some silly rom-com, but know that, not only will your partner enjoy their movie, but they will love it even more than you sat next to them and watched it.
10. Draw you a bath
This is something that you should definitely not do in the middle of your partner's busy day, but at the end of the day, maybe after dinner, a bath would be lovely.
Many of us don’t do baths because we are too busy. Drawing your partner a bath signals to them that you will do the things that need to be done, and they can just relax.
11. Fold the laundry
This is an act of service that I would not appreciate because I love to fold my laundry, but I would definitely appreciate it if my boyfriend put my laundry away after I folded it.
What would your partner appreciate around the laundry? Would they like you to do the whole thing, wash, fold, and put away, or would some portion of it make them happy? Watch their laundry habits and see what you think they would like best.
12. Hold a door open
This one does it for me and for almost every person I know — a man who holds the door open so that we can pass through without touching it. Bonus points if you go around to their side of the car and open their door before they get in or out.
13. Pick you up from the airport
My ex used to pick me up at the airport — which was lovely — but he was always waiting for me at the curb. My boyfriend makes that extra effort and parks the car and is waiting for me when I come through the gate. I love that — and it definitely makes me feel special!
John Gottman's research on successful relationships emphasizes the importance of turning toward your partner during moments when they need support. Airport pickups represent a clear example of this principle because they require significant time, effort, and often inconvenience.
14. Anticipate your needs
This is a very hard one for men, not because they don’t want to, but because it doesn’t come naturally to them. But this is the No. 1 act of service that would make a huge difference in making your partner feel loved. There isn’t a person I know who doesn’t wish that their man anticipated their needs more often.
If you have no idea how to do this, watch your partner and see what they do. Maybe ask their friends what they think you might like to do for them. And then do it. The rewards will be worth going out on a limb and doing something you aren’t comfortable with.
15. Make breakfast in bed
Wouldn’t you love it if your partner brought you a yummy breakfast in bed? That they took the time to get up before you and whipped together something that you loved? I am guessing yes. So, do it for them!
That being said, don’t leave the kitchen a mess that they have to clean up. That will undo all of the good that you did with breakfast.
Research in attachment theory shows that nurturing behaviors are fundamental expressions of care and bonding. When a man prepares breakfast in bed, he's engaging in what is called caregiving behavior.
16. Plug in your phone
Of course, we all hate it when our phone battery runs out overnight. We are often left adrift without it working, and that makes us crabby.
If you see your partner's phone lying around, in need of a charge, plug it in — especially before bedtime. That way, it will always be working, and you can text them those little love notes that they enjoy receiving.
It’s important that men do these acts of service regularly so that their partners feel loved and cared for and safe.
Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC-based Certified Life Coach who works with individuals who strive to heal their toxic relationships so they can have their happily ever after. Mitzi's bylines have appeared in The Good Men Project, MSN, PopSugar, Prevention, Huffington Post, Psych Central, among many others.
