If You Want Her, Stop Being Lazy And Plan A Date Already

I've had it with lazy dates.

man flirting with woman at bar Monkey Business Images / Shutterstock

I've had it. Call me crazy, but I'm completely, totally, and insanely pissed off with the current dating scene. Do you know why? Because it's lazy. It's lazy, and nobody is putting any effort into actually impressing anyone anymore.

And worse still, it's usually the girls who seem to be doing all the legwork on getting romance on. I can't even remember the last time I heard of a guy trying to be romantic with a girl and actually planning a good first date.


Actually, I can. I was born back in the 80s when the internet wasn't really a part of dating. My first couple of boyfriends didn't just text me barely-English sentences asking to meet up after class. They actually would plan dates ahead of time, and even fret a bit about how they looked!

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Imagine that. Guys can actually put some thought into dates. And I loved it! Here's the deal, men. You need to get off your butts and follow this dating advice.

Here's why it's worth planning a date, every single time:

1. Girls will notice it.

Do you have any idea how many half-assed attempts at dating an average woman gets thrown her way? It's a lot. Seeing a real attempt is something that is memorable in and of itself.


It's the kind of thing that will get shared with our female friends after the fact, and also make them a bit jealous. If for any other reason, do this because girls notice it.

2. It makes us feel good about you and ourselves.

Women don't want to be with a guy who acts like they're a last-ditch attempt at getting in bed. It makes them feel bad and it makes the guy look like a jerk. Guys who want to actually get praise from a girl will do this and skip the jerk behavior.

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3. Because, really, if you can't even do this right, you should be ashamed of yourself.

No, really. Men don't have to do much in a relationship. They don't dress up for a nice restaurant anymore. They often don't really do much in terms of trying to keep a girl. They don't even make the first move half the time anymore.


Then, they have the gall to bemoan how women "don't appreciate a real man." We do, but we haven't really seen many of them because real men plan dates!

4. Most women do want a man who invests some time and effort into them.

Here's the thing guys don't seem to understand: we don't want to deal with people who are so casual about dating. Honestly, when it gets too casual and the guy makes no effort to even try to be romantic, it feels dirty.

Dating no longer becomes fun. It becomes a weird, slimy endeavor that basically feels like it's one step above prostitution. Unless you want to be dismissed, downgraded, and later just treated like a gigolo, you'll put some romance into it.

5. Do you really want to tell your future kids that you didn't plan dates with their mom?

For real. Think about that. You won't have a story about how you dashingly seduced your future wife, and how you swept her off her feet. You'll, instead, be able to regale them with how you texted her "Netflix and chill?" Is that really what you want?


RELATED: 8 Important Red Flags To Look For On A First Date (And How To Tell If He's Worth A Second Date)

Ossiana Tepfenhart writes primarily about lifestyle, food, finance, and relationships. You can follow her on Twitter.