How You Ruin Your Relationship (Without Even Realizing It)

Plus: 5 ways you block love.

unhappy wife arguing with husband Aquarius Studio / Shutterstock

Are you creating a wedge between you and the men who love you? If you're favoring your masculine side too much, you sure are!

We all want to experience true love. Being in a healthy, loving relationship is an absolutely magical feeling. But if you're a strong, capable, independent woman, you could be unknowingly blocking yourself from love.

Whether single or in a relationship, women with masculine energy create an invisible barricade against men, hindering their own ability to attract and maintain healthy, loving relationships.


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Do you exude masculine energy? Millions of women in today's world have ramped up their masculine sides. It's been necessary to embrace the male traits in order to be successful in business, run households, and accomplish endless day-to-day tasks.


Unfortunately, there is a price to be paid for this yin-yang imbalance. When you lose touch with your yin (femininity) and amplify your yang (masculinity), you create an unseen armor against men and love.

You see, inside of each of us are the traits and characteristics of both masculine and feminine energy.

The masculine side is driven, competitive, protective and solution-oriented. The feminine side is collaborative, multi-tasking, intuitive, receptive, magnetic, and flowing. Balancing the two is a beautiful dance. When in harmony, your masculine and feminine aspects are complementary, not opposing, and interact to achieve great success in all aspects of life, including love.

However, it's often true that successful, independent women over-utilize their masculine energy. While your masculine energy can propel your career, it can also wreak havoc in your relationships by blocking love.


Here you ruin your relationship (without even realizing it):

1. You emasculate your man.

If you're the type of woman who "wears the pants" in the relationship, you're forcing your partner to be the one wearing the dress, meaning, if you operate more in your masculine, your partner will be more in his feminine. For most men, this feminine energy is difficult to maintain.

Even a sensitive man needs to be in touch with his masculinity. Men operating from the feminine become exhausted and depleted and thus will experience an urge to pull away or shut down.

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2. You send the message: "You're not needed."

Are you so independent, capable, and strong that it makes a man feel like he has nothing of value to offer?


Men need to feel needed. It helps enhance their esteem and makes them feel great when they can help you. If you send the message "I am perfectly capable of doing it all myself, thank you very much," you'll leave no room for your man to show his love and support. After being shut down, your partner may search outside of your relationship for a way to fill his deep-seated need to contribute.

3. You become unattractive.

Masculine women aren't attractive to men because opposites attract. A successful, healthy, masculine man will be searching for an authentic, feminine woman. Even if you are a beautiful woman, men will likely find you unattractive if you are living from your masculine energy.

True desirability has more to do with the way a person makes us feel than with how they look.

Real magnetic attraction is created when a person makes us feel wonderful. Men feel wonderful when they are in their authentic masculine energy. A feminine woman knows how to make her man feel like a man. This causes him to feel so good; he is drawn to her like a powerful magnetic force.


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4. You create competition.

Masculine energy is competitive. If you're vying for power in your relationship, you're killing the connection to love.

Competing with your man sends him a signal that you are opposing forces rather than a team. Happy, bonded relationships exist when each partner encourages and supports the other. If you're busy trying to gain the upper hand and control your man, he'll feel more like a servant than a partner, and your attraction to each other will wither away.

5. You lose touch with yourself.

Allowing your masculine side to dominate your life will rob you of your radiance.


It disconnects you from your essential feminine essence. You absolutely shine when you embody your unique feminine radiance! Connecting to your femininity is essential to nurturing your soul and connecting with your playful, sensual, authentic Self. From this joyful feminine energy, you become alluring to men who seek to love and adore you.

It's time to remove the blocks to love! Women possess a sparkling brilliance when we’re connected to our raw feminine power. Knowing the ways your masculine energy blocks love allows you to make conscious choices to embrace your femininity. This return to your divine, feminine energy will remove the blocks to love and open the doors to a juicy and fulfilling relationship.

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Sherri Nickols is an award-winning author, motivational speaker, and relationship/women's empowerment coach.