How A Man Acts In This Specific Situation Reveals If He’s Husband Material — 'Choose That Man Wisely'
“It’s not just about good morning texts and matching Halloween costumes.”
Nathan Cowley | Pexels When you’re deciding who you want to spend the rest of your life with and if a man is "husband material," there are a lot of things to consider. Unfortunately, many people tend to focus on the superficial. There’s a lot more to think about than just whether someone has a pretty face, though.
The person you choose to spend your life with will be there with you through countless hard times. Whether or not they really support you when you need it most has little to do with appearance. One man understood this well and gave some very poignant advice on choosing a husband.
A man is husband material if he can help you get through the death of your parents.
A TikToker named Davi, known as @ddp8792 on the app, shared some advice about finding the man you’re going to marry. While his advice will likely be hard for some to hear, it is nonetheless important and can really open your eyes to a new perspective. “Your husband will literally have to guide you through the death of both of your parents,” he said. “So choose that man wisely.”
“Okay, you’re out here picking based on who you think looks hot in a backwards hat,” he continued. “Meanwhile, the real test is, can you trust them to talk to your dad’s doctor when you’re feeling too overwhelmed to do it yourself, and to ask the right questions, remember what was said, understand it, and then help you through it?"
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Davi admitted that no one is perfect, and you’d be hard pressed to find someone who never lets you down. But that shouldn’t stop you from focusing on what’s most important and being picky about it. “Because one day, I promise you, life is gonna body slam you with grief, and the guy who only brings vibes is gonna fold like a lawn chair,” he argued. “If you find the man who can hold you up when you’re going through it, hold onto that for dear life.”
Experts backed up the claim that a man’s inner qualities matter the most.
Co-founder of Aspen Relationship Institute, Lori Kret, LCSW, BCC, addressed the importance of the person you’re considering choosing as your life partner having a strong foundation. “This doesn’t mean they have to be the most popular, rich, fit, and successful person,” she said. “But they have to be able to stand on their own in each aspect of life or be actively working on doing so.”
Additionally, a study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that there is a connection between empathy and relationship satisfaction. “High levels of empathy will strengthen the negative correlation between romantic relationship satisfaction and loneliness because individuals with high empathy tend to be more invested in a romantic relationship, show more attention and dependence on their partner, and have more involvement,” the study authors wrote.
The advice to choose support over looks struck a chord with other TikTok users.
Davi’s post currently has almost 30 million views and 5.6 million likes. Over 67,000 people left their thoughts in comments that showed the impact his words had. “Excuse me, you just changed my brain chemistry,” one person said. “Excellent advice! This man is going to be your emergency contact,” said another.
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Several shared personal stories that proved Davi’s point. “My husband was my rock through the loss of my parents, sister, and our son,” one person shared. Another added, “On the night I knew my mom was going to pass, I had to practically beg my ex-husband to be there. His looks were perfect, but he had such an ugly soul.”
Someone who’s attractive is great, but looks don’t really mean much if they aren’t kind and caring. When deciding if a man is husband material, you have to consider the fact that you will need him to be there for you during some of the lowest points of your life. Who he is on the inside matters much more.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor’s degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.
